I've literally never been in a position to be able to reject someone, but I'm pretty sure I'd just tell them... Ignoring them seems cruel...
Ignoring someone is either going to offend the person, or make them try harder, doesn't seem like a good option.
Yes. I've had a problem saying no before. One guy in particular, at university over the summer, wanted me in a really pathetic way, tried getting me drunk and making out with me, kept me up later than I intended "watching a movie," I probably had to tell him fifteen times that I'm done, I have to get some sleep, we can go out for coffee tomorrow, before he left me alone. Of course, when tomorrow actually came, I realized how offended I was, and I just stayed away from the apartment all day, I was absolutely furious. I should have just told him I wasn't interested the first time. Instead I wasted an OK night with an overgrown whining boy that I didn't even like, and wasted a nice day being angry and evasive. Okay so that's a little more than just ignoring someone, that's a serious avoidance problem I've got.
After men hit on me, I tend to give off an aura of "I'm not interested, go away" and they stop pestering me.
I'd say ignoring the fact someone likes you is a less offensive way of turning them down than telling them you're not attracted to them, especially if they haven't explicitly said they like you. Depending on the person it might make them try harder. I've had a couple of girls being progressively less subtle in trying to let me know they like me, thinking I didn't already get it. Then a couple of times if I've seemed disinterested in girls that I think like me they've quickly given up. Telling girls I'm gay is the nicest way to turn them down though because it's no reflection on them if you don't like them. I've been able to do that a couple of times recently. Haven't had the problem of having to turn down a guy yet though.
People rejected me before that way. Its REALLY REALLY cruel, i think. Saying "no" would hurt, but a lot less.
Yeh that's for sure you have to lie and tell a guy you have a boyfriend to get him to back off even if your lesbian or straight woman
Yeah, a lot of guys don't back of until they know that another guy has the woman claimed. They don't respect a woman's refusal unless it's a violation of another man's "property." :dry: -- Ignoring someone's approaches isn't universally cruel. It's often necessary when someone just doesn't get the hint. There's a girl who likes me and has been persistent for months, despite the fact that she knows I'm gay. There's no point in continuing to emphasise that after a while, so pretending I'm oblivious to her is a better tactic.
I did that with a guy that stalks me and he actually got fed up and left . he 'll always come out of no where and starts chatting me up and I would kept saying I'm not interested , and he would say things like I have hope one day , I'll get ya , it's only when I out right ignored and acted oblivious him and didn't care what he had to say he gave up and left .
I'm usually oblivious to anyone's advances, not by choice. I don't expect people to be attracted to me, so their flirting is usually only seen as friendliness. But if someone was interested in me, and made it very clear but the feeling isn't mutual, then I'd act oblivious and/or ignore their advances. If they're very persistent though I'll break their hearts by just being honest with them and telling them I'm flattered but not interested in a relationship with them
There's no pretending involved. I'm not very good at picking up when someone's flirting with me unless they're REALLY obvious. For some reason, a lot of the men who try to chat me up are utter sleazeballs. I was out at a hen night the other day and some fella ran up to me half-pissed and stroked my arm. This is more or less how the conversation unfolded: [Random guy]: "I WANNA GET LAID!" *Dopey grin* [Me]: "Good for you, mate." *Backs off* [Random guy]: "No, you don't understand! I want to have sex." [Me]: "Maybe you should try that club?" *Indicates* [Random guy]: *Leans close, smirks nervously* [Me]: *Leans back* [One of the other hens]: "She's not interested, why don't you take a look in the queue for the club?" [All of us]: *Moving on quickly* *Me* - very bloody grateful to my fellow hen. I'm not assuming all men are like that at all, I just seem to have a talent for attracting guys like that. Sad thing is, most women assume I'm straight by first appearances. That or they're so blood subtle in how they flirt that I never pick up on it.
With women I do tend to say outright "I don't like boobs. I don't even like my own boobs" or something similar. I think it's one of the better forms of rejection because, as people have said, it's nothing to do with them personally. With men it's more difficult. I went through a phase of wanting to be single for a while so I'd wear a ring on my wedding finger when I went on nights out and point to it when people came over with the look on their face. I have some hearing problems in crowded places so I can't always communicate properly in clubs and the likes. In everyday situations I tend to use body language when someone starts getting amorous - turning away, not replying properly, fiddling on my phone, being generally distant. If they keep pushing I'll generally come up with something to spare their feelings, or if they're especially annoying I'll start talking about my '6"7 cage fighting husband". The only time I've ever felt really bad turning someone down was this really sweet, awesome guy at a party. He was great, but I had just broken up with someone literally the day before, and I needed some time. I told him so and he was really supportive without trying to be a 'nice guy'. I still wish I hadn't said no to him.
No, but someone did that to me. First she was very enthusiastic about everything and then began ignoring me, never even said hi anymore. It did hurt (more so than if she had said no) and it also made her look very bad and childish. Especially when after 2 months she began talking to me again, as if nothing had happenned.
