Should i feel guilty?

I'm gay. I am also good looking, smart, charming, funny, and approachable. Now i know i must sound a bit vain, but i'm not. Anyway what i am trying to get at, is that girls like me. I have noticed this esspecially at work. I could be accused of leading the girls on by having lunch with them (seperatly) and somewhat flirting with them.
Because i work in such a big department store, not everyone knows i'm gay. I havn't told any of the girls because frankly, I enjoy the attention. In the past when this has happened i have been asked out on dates, i refuse, which makes the girls feel bad and then they stop talking to me. I do feel a tad guilty about this situation. Should I?

[jazzrawr]

Well, a bit. You flirted with them, and then turn around and say no when they ask you out because you like the attention, is that what you're saying?
If so, that's a bit mean to the girls.
I'm sure you don't mean to hurt them, but wouldnt you rahter be getting attention from guys, whom you're attracted to, not girls who you aren't?

Thanks Jazz. I suppose you are right. Oh and by the way i get plenty of attention from the boys.

[Trumpetplyer23]

Well...this situation is sorta similar to mine, but not really...if you get what I'm saying.

I feel that I am charming, smart, funny, articulate, and good looking. I reallly feel that way because I'm horribly confident, to the point of being cocky.

I'm very friendly and flirtatious with both genders. Sometimes, they flirt back, sometimes they just take it as a compliment.

Now, this is where we are different, you are gay. I'm bi. I don't mind getting attention from girls and guys because I'm attracted to both genders...but you're only attracted to guys.

What I suggest you do is, not flirt as heavily with the girls as the guys. So the girls think that you're being friendly, but you're actually flirting with the guys.

I hope that helps.

[Ben]

Next time a girl asks you on a date, you should just tell her you're gay. Then she won't get all upset and feel rejected.

It's okay to like attention and to flirt, but I don't think it's alright to lead girls on and give them false hope.

I don't try to lead them on. I'm just trying to be friendly.

Play with them,then crush their hopes!Just kiddingYou shouldn't feel a guilty 'cause it's not your fault after all.They choose what they get...You can be friendly,why not,but when they step over it just spit the one:"I'm gay".That's what I'd do,but I don't have those problems...

Yes i suppose that would be the best responce. I'v never actually come out to a girl that likes me.

[-Michael-]

I get this.

Just because im comfortable around girls and totally as confident as if ive knew them for years, they think im really into them...

...which im not.

I don't do anything about it but if someone asked me out id just tell them.

[Bryan90]

"Attention", something I believe almost all human beings want in some way. Well of course you should feel guilty about it... it shows that you have a strong sense of conscience..

Though sometimes, the endeavours to seek attention can cause devastating repercussions.. But since you're smart and wise.. I guess you'd have a better sense of judgment than to shatter a female's heart and perhaps cause her to commit suicide..

I don't shoot the girls down, I try and come up with an excuse (e.g I'm really busy. I don't want to ruin our friendship etc). I was asked out again last night though (but not for a date). And i used the gay excuse. She was supprised and a little dissapointed, but we laughed later.

I wont deny my sexuality to become PM. I'm going to be fully OUT.

Originally Posted by Tommy Price

I wont deny my sexuality to become PM. I'm going to be fully OUT.

I wish more people were like you.

Thank you. So do I.

When I was younger I was worried about coming out because I thought that it meant that I could never become PM.

I understand. I do hope that I will be questioned on policy and decision, rather than on my private life. However, looking at current media trends, it seems that private life is more sought after. And not just in NZ.