Should One's Sexuality Be Known Around The Workplace?

You should not have to hide who you love where you work. Some would argue that "professionalism" is not talking about your private life, but whenever someone is talking about their trophy husband/wife and flaunting them around the office, I feel like there would be a hypocritical double standard if they were to say your orientation should be a secret.

This is also another reason why ENDA either needs to be passed through the house (which John "it's pronounced" Boehner won't let through) or Obama needs to have the courage to stand up for what's right and make an executive order for the well being of the nation.

 

If the subject comes up then, if you're out anyway, lying doesn't make sense. There's nothing wrong with coworkers knowing... it's just a random fact about you. At least, it should be that way.

This is really only if the question comes up though. If people didn't ask, you shouldn't flaunt it in their faces.

 

Only if it comes up. Sexuality is just one part of you; why make a big deal about it?

 

I don't really see a reason why your co-workers should know. My advice would be not to bring it up. If they ask, go ahead and tell them, you don't have to hide it if you don't want to.

Now, don't go around the place yelling "LOOK AT ME IM GAY" and throwing around pink confetti. That's just silly.

As An Gentleman said, don't make it a big deal.

 

That's an individual choice. If someone asks do you have a girlfriend just say no.

 

I guess it's up to each individual. There shouldn't be any harm in people knowing but that can depend on where you are. Where I am, there is an openly gay person and everyone gets on well with no issues at all.

Happy days

 

Those who ask me the right questions at work get an honest response. Then they know. And I'm sure quite a few others know after that.

 

Unless you work in an environment sterile of personal home details (maybe in the government's clandestine service :lol, tidbits of personal information, including who you are dating or seeing, will pop up casually from time to time. One should be able to discuss such personal information to the degree that one is comfortable with or that the company's culture is comfortable with (whichever is lower). However, this assumes that the firm one is employed by does not have any de facto or de jure discriminatory policies against LGBT.

 

With my work it came up at a few points. Firstly a guy i work with was asking me which girl looked hotter over an after-work pint, i was just like "dunno im gay" after a couple of times deflecting. Another time my bar manager was trying to set me up with girls, so it came out, and that went badly at the time Third instance there was a rumour i was sleeping with one of the girls at work, so she ended up shouting it out infront of all my workmates. After that everyone knows

I just feel like im being dishonest if i dont say sometimes. Like someone asks why i dont have a gf? Then why dont i have a gf? Then do i want to be set up with a gf? Its just easier to say nah, im gay

 

I reckon only mention it if someone brings it up!

 

In an ideal world you wouldn't need to hide it, in reality it could be a bad idea. I used to work at a place that was full of homophobes. Maybe young people would be more accepting, the older generation isn't.

 

I'm fully out to my boss and coworkers at my current job, meaning I routinely talk about my partner and what is going on in our lives just as my coworkers routinely talk about their spouses and significant others and what is going on in their lives. He's met them on numerous occasions including going with me to the holiday party and such. If anything, my partner is more out then I am in this regard with his work.

Basically the same situation has applied at every place I've worked for the last 15yrs or so.

If someone at my work didn't know for some reason, I'm certainly not going to hide or deflect or whatever about the issue. It's nothing to be ashamed of nor is it unprofessional for people to know any more than it is for me to know they're straight and have an opposite sex spouse or whatever.

Todd

 

I've been out at my places of employment since I came out about 20 years ago. It's never been an issue. As to people who say it's not professional--they don't realize how often it comes up, especially when you have a partner. My coworkers don't just know about my partner, they know my partner. People who say you shouldn't talk about your sex life at work--and I generally agree with that in theory--always apply that standard unevenly. If my male coworker says he went to a new restaurant with his wife last night that's not "about his sex life." Yet somehow when I say my partner and I went to the opera last night many will say that is me talking about my sex life. That's bullshit--with one notable partial exception:lol: we don't have sex at the opera either. In my opinion if your coworkers don't know you will have to lie to them--I'm not willing to do that. Clients or customers can be another matter. It doesn't come up as often--but when it does I'm open. I work principally with older wealthy clients and sometimes I get a bit of nerves when it comes up--but I'm good at my job and my clients like me. I've never had a problem. I remember one of the first times in my present position that it came up with a client. It was an older lady and I honestly didn't know how she would absorb the news--I made a reference to my partner and then followed it up with the correct pronoun later on in the anecdote (I try not to be ambiguous--I think people find it irritating and frankly that it damages their trust in you). She took it in stride; we finished her business and she left my office. Several minutes later she came back in, leaned in rather close to me and said: "what you shared with me earlier--I want you to know that it means a lot to me that you would share that about yourself. It makes me feel even closer to your. And I just wanted you to know that I appreciate it." Then she left.

Give people a chance. In my experience they rise to the occasion.

 

As I'm still single, I don't think it's anyone's business, however if I was in a relationship with another man, I would use male pronouns when describing him.

 

I don't think it needs to be hidden or flaunted. I only tell people that I trust or am genuinely interested in as a person/friend. I don't tell gossipy people that need to know or want to know everyone's business. They don't add anything useful.

 

In my case the last place I worked it was completely irrelevant plus alot of my coworkers were heavily religious and coming out to a negative response would have created lots of problems for me so I never bothered.

Ideally I think you'd want to be around people who know/don't care for a lifelong career tho

 

That hits the nail on the head.