Is it normal to be called "gay"?

I've only been called "gay" a few times in my entire 1st-12th career and never by relatives; it was mostly as a way to jerk each other's chain.

Either you live with people who like to go fishing (i.e. trawl for answers) or there may have been some tick or trait that may have been perceived as "suspect."

 

Yes, we live in heteropatriarchal society. Bigotry based on gender and sexuality is common.

Also, everybody knows that if you call someone else a fag, that like, makes you super cool or something.

 

I'd call it more than annoying. For me, it was deeply hurtful. That peer abuse is something I still haven't gotten over, and my revenge complex is probably insurmountable.

 

"Honestly bro that's mad gay you're such a fag honestly yo" - How to be "cool."

---------- Post added 9th May 2014 at 09:54 PM ----------

They don't understand it. It's a shame. When a straight person is called "gay" they don't take offense to it that much. Calling someone who isn't open "gay" as an insult is so hurtful deep down & you have to cover it up, ugh, I know how you feel.

 

That is a really really weird thing to say to family. 0_0

 

When I was a kid, you'd throw it around before you knew what it meant. My brother's friends threw it around non-stop. My little sister said some snot at daycare called her gay. Learning to recognize homosexuality as a social taboo seems to be part of growing up. Hopefully, that crap will dwindle to nothing soon.

 

Nobody ever told me. People judge all those who are different. You told it yourself, "you're not the manliest man out there", so people will call you gay for that. Nice? Not at all!

It's society. Anyone who doesn't fit in is the victim. You can be called a freak, a fat person, an ugly person, etc.. It happens unfortunately.

My parents subtly say "when you have a girlfriend - or boyfriend", but I don't mind, since I'm bisexual. :roflmao: But I never told them (they never asked me), so they simply guessed it right? Perhaps it has something to do with our point of view, who knows, but I wouldn't care that much about it if I were you. (*hug*)

 

It was common for me, I got called a bunch of things like that

 

It could also help to explain why you are struggling so much with your orientation. To hear all of this crap during childhood, especially from people who should love and nurture you is extremely damaging. It creates a level of internalised homophobia and self loathing that can be so difficult to overcome, but I do believe you will get there in the end. I know you can't see the light right now, but hang in there and keep talking/venting.

 

I don't recall ever being called gay as a young person--certainly not by family.

 

This has been part of my daily life since I was 5. I also couldn't understand why, was it my voice(effeminate), uptick(which I still have) or was it something else I did?
Anyway, I had to endure all those years the constant names and actions they did to make me feel like trash. It also didn't help knowing deep inside that somewhere in there I liked guys, which made it harder because they said gay or fag(in the spanish variant) as if being that is something wrong, so it caused more self hatred and other things.

My siblings also called me gay and other members of my family. Kind of sick if you ask me, I had to endure being called gay/fag on school and now even at my house, no wonder my mom says I'm a cold person, this made me into what I am now. I'm trying to change things, like becoming more of what I was before all of that made me completely close myself from others. It's hard, but I guess all is possible with the love of God(in those that believe) and the support from people you love.

So hang in there confuseduser99 because even if by coming out we proof them right, it doesn't mean they had the right to make us feel bad and bully us. We are not gay because our voice is effeminate, or has an uptick, or because we have mannerism, etc. We are gay because we love other guys, and there is nothing wrong with loving. (*hug*)

 

My nephew was called gay once he just said thank you I'm very happy. I was surprised that he knew that the old fashioned word for gay means happy.

To awnser your question it's very normal unless it's used in a derogatory way.

 

I don't think its normal or right to get called gay. I dont hear ppl being addressed to as "straight".

 

I think that it is sad that it is normal, be creative and stop insulting people with things that are not offensive society. I have been directly asked about my sexuality multiple times by my family, they never meant it in an offensive way I think.