Something I've noticed since entering school was my tendency to remember boys, whether they be classmates, friends, or acquaintances. It's not like I made a conscious effort to, either, and it's not like I surrounded myself with boys, since I was a loner, more-or-less. It's just that if you were to ask me about my experiences, more of them would pop up for some reason or another. So I've wondered what reasons this could be, and if others might be able to relate. Is it attraction? A few members have commented how they mistook attraction for admiration, and certainly, there were plenty of boys I thought were awesome to the tenth power. Still, nothing romantic or sexual came up - a curiosity at most, but it's still worth considering, I think, considering how much of my attention was focused on them while everyone else was chasing girls. Perhaps it was something related to patriarchy? The guys might have seemed more "valuable" and "worthy", while the girls were left to the side: ignored and unimportant. There are plenty of studies out there showing that teachers, both male and female, tend to pay more attention to male students, as well as take them more serious. The same rules might very well apply here, too. Or it could be a lot simpler: fear of the unknown. Contrary to popular stereotype, plenty of gay and bisexual men and women feel awkward or uncomfortable around members of the opposite sex, for a variety of reasons, so again, this could be one explanation, especially for someone who already suffers from social awkwardness and anxiety! In fact, almost all my female friends and girlfriends made the first move, otherwise, I probably could have gone on without giving them a second thought, as it was way out of my comfort zone. As ridiculous as it might sound, I've always thought girl classmates were a lot more "uniform" - looking and acting similar, while keeping to themselves, or it seemed that way from my perspective. The guys were prone to act out, differentiate themselves, so it might be worth taking into consideration. It's totally different online - we get all sorts of whacky personalities, perspectives, and expressions! It's probably not worth spending as much time thinking over, but since it was one of the first thoughts that came to mind after waking up today, I decided why not? This is something I've wondered about from time-to-time, and decided to get to the bottom of it once and for all (or at least learn something new in the process). Anyway, looking forward to your responses.
I too can remember faces of girls I met once and names more than i do guys . this is what happens to me in real life I'll meet a girl again or saw and who told me her name , my straight mom might forget her and I'll so that isn't her her face was more like such and such . Now the same thing would happen to a guy which happens to me a lot they come up to me and said Hi Stocking how you . I'll be like "Who are again ?" the guy " I'm Tod we we met at the bookstore , or math class and we talked about how you blah blah " "sorry don't remember you " walks off . I can not count how many times that has happen and I made some men actually get sad that I forgot about them
I will say that I remember most of the guys from my high school more than girls, but I was also around them more often. I played on the baseball team and took stats and was the manager for the basketball team. I had to look away often because I would get too turned on, and I think I remember having to cover my pants with the clipboard a few times. I'll never forget the one time when the hottest guy in school showed me his scar on his thigh at halftime. It wasn't even that but just to see the skin...
Is it possible that you simply remember them because you tag them with the label male? His name was "Jeremy" and he was a dude. This is usually why people remember names and faces- they remember asymmetries of their appearance or they remember details about them like their job or their height or hair colour. You may just remember them because they were male
Interesting thread. I think it can be a combination of things that you have already mentioned above. It could also be because you identified more strongly with the male gender and boyhood so-to-speak then you seeked out other males to group yourself with. I also think that society does a lot to make it seem like girls and boys are so different. I was actually picking out cards today for my friends' childrens' birthday party and I already noticed how variant "boys" and "girls" cards were. For the girls, a card with a truck or some thing mechanical was a "no-no-no" and the same could be said about boys and pretty flower cards for example. It's a bit strange actually when you think about it. That's why I'm kind of not surprised that with this trend of separate socialization boys and girls may have an easier time dissociating themselves from each other. Oh...and I must say that I do spend more time noticing and remembering the gaze, touch and otherwise attention of an attractive woman...so it might also be attraction
