Parody the stereotypes!!! Of LGBT people "ooooo, look at those sandles *clicks tounge* they're FABULOUS *clicks toungue* now I'm going to walk down the street in my 2006 Armani dress shoes and watch the Wizard of Oz whilst I knit a tea cozy.....
A Day in the Life of a Stereotypical Lesbian Ok, so I'm awake now *yawn* I'm going to the bathroom.... Oh look, scales. I guess I need to weigh myself again. Oh, look, I'm still a ton. Ah well, I wear huge flannel shirts anyway, so at least they'll still fit. I look in the mirror and admire my mullet. Mullets, fuck yeah. Oh, look, it's nearly time for work... time to put on my birkenstocks and get in my pickup truck. Dum de dum.... driving to work.... ohhhh Melissa Etheridge is on the radio; I happen to know all the words to her songs. Come to think of it, I know her personally. Ok, I'm at work; doing my job. Something to do with building, or cars, or some other male dominated work. Because of course I'm practically a man anyway. Work is over now so I'm going shopping now to spend my hard earned cash. Maybe I could buy some more flannel shirts? Or maybe some boots? How about some power tools? OMFG LKHDFIHVCYIFCIYF POWER TOOLS OMFG FUCK YEAH POWER TOOLS. Right, I've updated my power tool collection. To celebrate, I'm going to a lesbian bar, because men are the devil. I'm much more manly than any man. So at the lesbian bar are the 2 girls 1 cup girls doing kinky shit in the corner. I buy a beer, the manliest beer they have, and I see two girls scissoring in the corner, as well as some straight guy who comes in and asks two random girls who don't even know each other to threesome with him. Of course they accept, they are lesbians after all. I get home to find my partner watching Ellen. I have all her episodes on tape, you know. Come to think of it, I know her personally. After watching Ellen I go upstairs with my partner to make love. Of course being lesbians, I merely lick her out and scissor, because there is no other possible way of lesbians having sex. Now, time for sleep. I dream of... mullets. And flannel shirts. And scissoring. And power tools. FUCK YEAH POWER TOOLS!
i no rite! armani was sooooooo last year. but i love WoO to PIECES!!!! i could just eat it up! nom nom nom! luvz! Ugh, I'm glad I don't sound like that.
Okay. So here I am, I'm 'bisexual'. But everyone knows I'm just a whore who's confused. Yep. I called my boyfriend and then ran into my girlfriend at the club. But, it's okay, because they're fine with threesomes. I just keep my boyfriend around so I don't have to admit I'm really gay, but don't tell him that. And I check out every human being I see. No matter what gender. I just enjoy being a total horndog and never committing to anything.
I'm a muscly, butchy, manly whore who looks more like a man than masculine men and would never even think of being seen in any of the following: A dress, stilettos, pink, anything with defining shape, and anything with flower patterns on it. I only like girls because I'm a lonely reject that all the men, er, rejected, and I got tired of being lonely so I chose to become a lesbian so my love life would look a bit better. I fucked guys anyway of course, but only in 3somes, and just to be cool. I absolutely despise anything creative and spend all my time running around the track and playing soccer and I'm even in the boys' team because there is no girls' one and the school doesn't even think I'm a girl anyway. I don't shop or cook. Those are my mistresses' jobs. I have ten of them. As in, mistresses. Just to make me look cool, of course. I scissor them five times each per day because I'm a lesbian f**king whore with no life. I'm going to die early because God hates lesbians so one day I'm going to be visited by the Devil who will burn me alive...yippee...
To model pirateninja's version... A day in the life of a stereotypical gay man: I wake up, stretch while simultaneously saying "FFFABULOUSSS." I spring out of bed, and gently poke my one night stand to wake him up. I ask him to leave, it was kind of awkward... I forgot his name again. OOPS! I pirouette across my room and open my pink dresser. From there I dress myself all in designer fashion, of the hot pink variety. I drape my sweater around my back and prance down the hall. My sex slave serves me breakfast in his leather harness. But, I can't eat what he made, I'm vegan, DUH! In an effort to preserve my twinkish figure, I skip breakfast. I go and get ready for work, 2 hours later, I'm ready! I walk outside and hop into my hot pink convertible. Looks like I already have a new fuckbuddy waiting in my car. Fabulous, I can get a quickie in before work. So after having unprotected anal sex in public, I feel as though I've done my part to continue the A.I.D.S. epidemic and continue to work. I arrive at Fabulous Fashion Boutique and Salon, where I not only style people's hair and nails, but give them complete wardrobe make-overs too! Life is fabulous. After a hard days work of 3 hours, I go home with a new guy, who I just met on the street. We have wild unprotected sex. So, after I kick him out of my house, I go out to the local gay bar. I just want to dance anyways. I get my glow in the dark rainbow beads and glowstick necklaces and head out. While dancing to the latest Kylie Minogue song, I can't help myself but to have a threesome with two random guys I was just dry humping during the song. We go to the bathroom stalls and have more wild unprotected sex. I get home fairly early, the sun hasn't even rose yet, after a night of sex drugs and more sex. The only thing that could finish the day off perfectly is to finish my 10th pack of cigarettes today... and to have more sex with the five guys I picked up tonight. Anyways, g'night diary, you're the only one who truly understands me. XoXoXoXo
Sorry, I can't come up with a stereotype. I'm much to busy pushing for unfair rights to be given to gay people, corrupting the sanctity of marriage and breaking down the nuclear family. If there's time, I might try and get "Gay Studies" a recognised subject taught from pre-school so I can recruit children for my many debauched parties. Phew. Breaking down Western Civilisation is pretty stressful work. I'd better take care or I'll get worry lines.
Bisexuality Text Adventure You awaken nude, atop an orgiastic bevy of nekkid mens and womens, after a night of rampant promiscuity. >Inventory Sex toy Sex toy a lack of condoms a midget sex toy latex gloves vasoline a multitude of phallic-shaped vegatables > Change clothes You put on your clothes, making sure to avoid underwear. >North Next door is skeazy club. A Bisexual girl is here. >Grope bisexual girl. The bisexual girl does not exist. >Grope bisexual girl. Did you mean, "Grope the lesbian?" >Grope the BISEXUAL GIRL. You grope the transitional lesbian. You enter the club, fondling other girls along the way in hopes that it will attract the attention of straight men. > Laud polygamy whilst simultaneously making out with a man, a woman, a herd of cattle, and a sensual plant. 10 pts. have been added to your score! Graphics have been activated as a reward!
I'm bisexual of course. I woke up this morning next to my girlfriend. Or was it boyfriend? Both maybe? Bah I can never remember, so forget that. In any case the person I was seeing recently asked me to marry them. I of course ran screaming. Commitment? That's of course a four letter word to us bisexuals. You might as well douse us with holy water. Oh well. Today's a hot day. I would go to the beach but I might die from hotness overload seeing as anything that moves could potentially turn me on. Maybe I'll just go find a man and woman to take home. We can't be happy with one person, naturally we need both to be satisfied. This entire description is actually a figment of your imagination, everyone knows bisexuality doesn't exist. It's just a step closer to gayness, or a confused state in which the person will eventually go back to being straight.
Well, I'm bisexual, which of course means I'm actually gay but don't want to admit it, and also means that I'm a sex-crazed maniac that isn't satisfied with just one sex. I have a girlfriend and boyfriend, since I'm confused and can't decide on just one, and of course I also have multiple other sex-partners to help spread AIDS and other diseases to straight people, which of course is entirely the fault of "promiscous" people like myself.
