The Dumbest Thing You've Said...

I said I was born in the year 1898, in a serious appointment :lol: by accident of course, well she laughed anyway.

 

When I was younger, but not young enough to get away with this stupidity, I raced my shadow (...Yes my shadow). Anyway, I gained some speed and then forgot to stop when I reached my front door and while I was looking back at my shadow I smacked straight into the door causing me to fall backwards into a plant pot.

Not my brightest moment.

Edit: just read the title again, dumbest thing you said. If it helps I was commentating the race as it went along until it came to a sudden stop.

 

Somebody asked me what my name was, but I couldn't hear him, and I thought he asked what time it was, so I said 2:30

 

My grandma was drunk and didn't look pretty and I was like grandma u look so old! It was funny to me but not to everyone else in the car

 

While staying in a hotel with my brother and friend, my friend started to talk in his sleep. He said " You can just move the building." to which I replied in my sleep. " Ok. Where?"

 

My friends keep swearing they'll record me when I'm tired because basically, I act drunk and I say really stupid shit.

"I should get a sheep. I'll name him BAAAAAAAAAWB"

"What if EVERYTHING was made of candy? That'd be so cool, guys. But then...ants. And that's not cool."

 

Dumbest thing I've said...hmm basically anything that comes out of my mouth that might affect me...

 

I'm wandering through Europe in 1982 and end up one evening in Brussels, Belgium.

I know they speak either Flemish or French...I go to see a movie, I think I'm all cool, like I know the place, and I ask, is the movie in Flemish or in French? I'll never forget the look on the cashier's face...

The title of the movie is Mel Brooks' Silent Movie.

 

"TWISTED SISTER IS SO LOUD ITS MAKING YOU SAY DICKS!" -Krazy

 

When my mom was telling me that one of her friends was a germaphobe when I was about 8, I stopped talking to my mom for a couple of days and she couldn't figure out why until she had my little brother ask me and I responded with, "I don't want to talk to someone that is scared of Germans for no reason"

 

One time I asked my dad what day of the week Saturday was...

 

I say stupid things all the time, it's hard to pin down a specific incident!

I remember asking a woman a few hours before her husband's funeral how she was doing in a very cheerful tone.

 

Sitting around a table at dinner one night a friend across the table that I had a huge crush had been teasing me... Instead of the typical teasing " don't make me come over there and kick you ass"... I blurted out "don't make me come over there and kiss you..". I turned many shades of red and my friends still remind me of that story..

 

Hmm...where to begin? :lol:

But seriously, I say dumb things EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. -_-

 

grocery store checkout dude that looked stoned as hell : did you know they changed the tony pizza guy?
me, tired as hell: uhh they did?
dude: yeah *pulls pizza box out of bag and points*

i am a loser and tired-laughed really hard for like ten seconds and finally managed to say "he looks like a dork"


Now I dont go to that grocery store, out of shame.

 

the amount of stupid things i say in a day is unbelievable...

but the one my sister won't let me forget was when i was twelve and asked her if danishes were from germany. she laughed for a really long time, and then when she realized i was serious, stared at me and asked my question back to me.i still didn't get it. i had to ask my dad. :icon_redf

 

When I was younger I asked my mom "what does gay mean?" She pointed to a gay friend of ours and I said to him "hi Mr.Gay!" He turned a dark shade of red

 

OChem chemistry lecture. 8AM.

The professor asks a random question of "what are some of the uses of potassium chloride."

I blurt out: lethal injections.

The whole lecture hall turned to look at me. I don't know why I said it, but given that I was tired and cranky, I probably had bad thoughts in my head and wished I could execute whoever came up with college class at 8 o'clock in the morning :lol:.

 

Oh, here's one. When I was a kid, my mom explained the birds and the bees but I didn't have a concept of what sperm was. So as she was explaining how the penis went into the vagina, I cried out, in horror, "YOU MEAN HE PEES INSIDE HER??"

She just laughed, said yes, and I had no idea sperm was a thing until I discovered the internet.