Do you have to be good looking to find someone?

Wait, you literally say in the same sentence that you don't like that people are picky, but you say you're picky.

No, you don't have to be, but you can't a) expect it to come to you, or b) be picky on physical traits. You don't have to say yes to everyone, just don't go for only modelesque people, especially if you don't have the traits you're asking for.

 

yes! Absolutely, haven't you heard that looks are everything lately /sarcasm

On a more serious note, you don't have to be good looking at all. In my opinion, good looking is a subjective trait and there's really no way to judge who is good-looking and who isn't. Obviously, you can subject yourself to society's standards of good-looking. But those are extraordinarily high standards and somewwhat impossible to do as you can't please everyone. If you can find yourself good-looking then, in my opinion, you are good-looking.

 

Well being gay is already difficult, have in mind that 96 or 97 percent of the world's population is straight so even if you are good looking indeed you will have a hard time trying to date

So yeah it helps but being gay is already a huge handicap

 

you honestly don't think your attractive?? what do you think about your voice? your macho-ness? your weight? are you confident in those?

 

YES, it is important if you want a superficial relationship with a shallow boyfriend.

 

Of course you don't have to be traditionally attractive to find a partner or partners.

There's a lot to be said about people having different ideas of what is attractive. There's even more to be said about the difference feeling good about yourself makes in how others perceive you.

Also, keeping a more open mind about who you're considering as a person you might want to date. The person doesn't have to be the most attractive person in the world when you first see them to be attractive to you. Talk to people, get to know them, and sometimes someone who looked plain or just okay at first might come to be the most gorgeous person you've seen because knowing them makes you literally see them differently. Of course initial physical attractiveness is helpful, but it doesn't sustain a romantic relationship all on its own.

 

I actually tried to date some guys that I really found attractive, although they could be considered ugly by many others, still they said no thank you lol!

 

WhaT??!!! I HAd a lover (well not 100% we kinda date just he is kinda straight so we broke up)
most people think he is so short and ugly
but i always find him cute and hot
but he didn't feel as strong as i did and he rejected me and called me names and told me to stop talking to him he was bi i know but he just doesn't like what he used to feel
after time we talked to each other again as friends like nothing ever happened
the point is don't be shallow and don't choose someone who only likes you on the outside thats not love thats just attraction toward your body not your soul

 

In general, no you don't have to be really good looking to date someone when it clicks, it just clicks.

^ To me I don't really agree with that; yes I am super picky.

 

Yes to this :icon_bigg ! I've had it where this girl that I've felt romantic attraction towards was really funny, so that made her quite attractive in my eyes. And I've had it where I've been around a guy who was a 10, and another guy who was about a 7, but in my eyes I would rather be with the guy who was a 7.

And OP, you're attractive, so you won't have any problems finding attractive men. Just keep an open mind and put more emphasis on their personality.

 

Looks are subjective and fade- it'll for sure happen one day. Hey. It happened to me. It will happen to you one of these days.

 

You only need to be good looking if your standards are for a good looking person. But if that's a picture of you in your avatar, you look fine, maybe a bit better than average. You're by no means ugly. I don't plan on being fat for long, I barely eat any food any more, and by my facial features I'll look very good when I lose weight. But even if I look good, I won't exclude people from dating me just because they look worse than me. I have my standards of course, but those are in other aspects of the person.

 

I sometimes feel a little bit sorry for the "beautiful" people in the world, because their looks will eventually fade.

For their younger years, their looks define their worth, and when they lose that - if they haven't worked on their inner beauty - it can be very very difficult.

But if they DO have inner beauty - it can be an amazingly enlightening experience.

 

Be open about it. Say hi, be a little flirty, compliment (but keep decent boundaries until you're 120% sure they're up for flirting). This isn't the 60s; most queer men don't have to give surreptitious handkerchief signals and careful eye movements now - you really need to be open about your intentions for others to be open about theirs.

You can instigate. It's almost a necessity. I hate to use such a cliché phrase, but it takes two to tango.

 

Not really. When it comes to looks your cute

 

First, I second happydavid.

Second, flirting. There is no magic formula, and don't try to follow any set of rules. Flirting must be genuine, simple, and appropriate. For example, you meet a guy, you talk to him. Ask him about his interests, strike common ground. It's best if you meet someone at a bar or somewhere like that to talk about something immediate; the music, the drinks, the people, anything relevant to the situation. If you meet a guy in a class, speak to him about that class. Then move on to speaking to him about him. Listen as much as you can, and insert good questions and comments (polite, not too personal etc.) which indicate that you're following him. Of course, it has to be natural; flirting doesn't run as an interview and you don't get to take notes. Flirting is a conversation involving learning about someone a little, and giving a few compliments. There really isn't any convention, just do what's natural - it's easy to tell when someone is being awkward. If anything, aim to be someone's friend before someone's sexual/romantic partner. It's nice being able to chat to someone who seems genuinely interested.

That's assuming you're after a somewhat romantic relationship in the long run. If you just want sex, you can probably go to a venue where that sort of behaviour is appropriate (like a nightclub), chat for a few minutes, throw in open compliments, and see where that gets you. You'll most likely be rejected one or two times, but if you're trying to make lovers out of strangers, that's bound to happen.

Being a novice isn't a bad thing; you might be able to play the "cute-awkward" card, though that tends to be actually well-delivered acting.

 

I'm no perfect ten, and have had several someones.

I also have little experience, terrible social skills, and suffer from anxiety, but somehow seem to draw people in, just by being... me.

Besides, they'd be fools to judge me by appearance alone and miss out on a potentially great time!