look at me go, being a nerd about psychology again but HEAR ME OUT OK this is actually really cool and it has impacted my life a lot this past year! Check out this neat TED talk! That's it. That's all there is. You just have to fake it. testimonial time yeehaw: Okay so once upon a time (my sophomore year) I used to be very shy. And had been for several years, if not my whole life. It was because of a problem that I think every LGBT individual can identify with: the whole process of questioning yourself and being in the closet. That's why it's so important, I think, to post this here for you. I had already come out as transgender, so my main concern at the time (at ALL times, still) was passing. I'm gonna level with you, I am 5'4" (about 1.63 meters) with a childlike face and I was just beginning to kick my "baggy clothes" phase. So yeah that was not working very well for me. I always wished I could be more confident like my friends. I wanted to be more friendly and outgoing. But most of all, I was sick of being left out when people had parties and stuff. Cut to around the beginning of 2nd semester this last year, I saw this video for the first time. Now as you can probably tell, I am very interested in human behavior so I decided HEY, why not give it a shot? So I did. I started out with just sitting differently. I started taking up more space than before. And then I followed with standing with my feet farther apart. Then, instead of watching the floor while I walked, I looked just above peoples' heads. Strangely enough, that's when I noticed the change. Instead of nearly being run over five times daily, people simply walked around me. They gave me more space. And, as a rather small person in a school with small hallways, that makes a monumental difference. I am no longer jostled or shoved by accident. And then, a bit afterward, it started happening. I started hearing "Andy" more often, and I started hearing "he" and "him" and even "sir." And THAT, my friends, is when I started passing. So yeah I totally recommend this. Try it yourself. Tell me what you think. GET EXCITED.
This is an awesome talk. “Fake it till you become it” I loved that phrase. I completely agree with that. I my opinion that how as if you were the confident person you want to become and, in the end, you will get there for real. There are just so many people that drown their potential in negativity...
this is very cool. This is the first time I've seen this, but for years I've thought that all you have to do so act like who you want to be, and it will happen. Act confident and you'll feel confident. My sister really needs to see this, she has self esteem issues and studies psychology. Conversely I think it's sort of a warning to not try and pretend to be someone just to impress people or fit in (being mean, making fun of people and other things) as you'll probably become like it (Mean Girls anyone? Random thought there, but it makes my point).
My problem with the "fake it till you become it" thing is that I never have enough confidence for the faking it. But I think I may try to do this and see how it goes.
^ yeah this is like my favorite one too! It's just super cool how small things can make a huge difference.
I saw this a while ago. It's pretty good. I had a strange turning point, very specifically on my last birthday. I dyed my hair green that day. That may have had something to do with it. But I suddenly felt incredibly confident, and all the shitty things that had held me back no longer did so. And I no longer had to pretend to be confident. I'll just say this; you might feel like you don't have enough confidence to pretend, but it isn't true. You don't need any confidence at all. The action takes a certain amount of will, and you can find it within yourself. Eventually, the confidence will come, and it will feel effortless.
