So last night was interesting...

Anyway, I've posted about what happened to me a couple weeks ago. To sum it up, a sexual predator used a false identity to lure me in and he violated and took advantage of me. We'll call him Catfish Eddie.

What followed was a rough week. I reported him anonymously to a national hotline (but was certain nothing had been done about it) Then it was a matter of just deciding where to go next from here.

I almost went on hiatus from EC as a matter of fact. But I'm here, lol.

Anyway, I met a guy who just might be the guy I've been looking for for a long time. And so I'm with someone now who I feel safe around, who I adore and who wants me for me so let me just say meeting Nick made a lot of things look up in my life.

But anyway. I figured, even though I haven't even known Nick that long, I could start leaving Catfish Eddie behind and feel like a part of me didn't have to stay in that hotel room anymore. Things were finally looking like they'd be okay for the first time in...hell, actually, forever. I was kind of weirded out, honestly, after I met him. "Gee, aren't I still supposed to be like, a neurotic wreck and everything? Why do I feel normal again around him?"

My family had no idea about what happened with Catfish Eddie. I had no intention of telling them. I figured, why would I? I wanted to forget it happened. I wanted to leave that hotel behind and I figured all my family would do is shame and blame me for it or worse, pity me.

Well... My old cellphone is back at my mom's house. I have a phone now, that old phone's basically a brick and she was going to give that phone to my sisters so they'd have a camera and games.

One of my old email accounts was on that phone. Now, a friend of mine had that old email and the night after I met Catfish Eddie, he helped compile a report for me. I didn't think to change my password, that email was basically defunct except for the fact that's the one a few of my friends have as my email address.

She happened to see that email, since it was the only one on there. And so she saw the report. Knew what happened to me.

Now that day, she came over to my place. I'd been out, hit Trader Joe's. Had no idea why she was over. But something felt off when I got in.

Mom asks me to talk with her. Alone. And I figure...oh shit. Something's up.

She asks me about what happened. I deny it at first but then she starts bringing up details and I realize- oh shit. She found out.

And so...she asks me about what happened. At first she doesn't 100% believe me because after it happened, I was able to hide what happened pretty well. And because, 'oh well, maybe she's making it up'

But I told her what happened. Reported it to police. An officer came over. Completely sympathetic to my case. Rape advocate came over, have resources. And they sent a guy down to that hotel.

My mom? She didn't blame me or shame me like I thought she would. And she's gonna support me through this.

I dunno. Weird as it sounds, this actually might be the turning point in our relationship. It had to take something like this but yeah...

 

Thanks, bro.

Yeah. I think I'll be okay.

 

Yeah, I was so afraid she wouldn't take it the right way or family would just shame me for being stupid.

I mean, I am kinda worried about her not accepting my boyfriend in light of this (even though he's very protective and supportive- I haven't told him all the details about what happened though) but you know, I needed her support. And I want to improve my relationship with her.

We're probably gonna see a new counselor- possibly together. I'm actually not too fond of my gender therapist as a matter of fact. And I think this highlights it. He hasn't really been addressing this at all after it happened.