what makes someone 'look' gay?

Nothing makes you look gay. People are just so keen on pissing their shit everywhere.

If you're outwardly male, people will start calling gay if you:

- have long hair
- have a feminine face
- have a high voice
- wear tight clothes
- like 'girly' things
- walk 'like a woman'

(ugh....)

If you're outwardly female:

- have short hair
- have a masculine face
- have a low voice
- wear baggy clothes
- like 'boyish' things
- walk 'like a man'

Do you see the pattern?

Of course, this is all stupid stereotypes.

I'm sorry you're targeted. You mentioned someone threatening to kill you? Can you report that to the police the next time it happens?

 

There is no one universal set of guidelines for what is considered gay. It's just that we have ideals where "guys should dress/act like this" and "girls should dress/act like this". If we fall out of these constructs or *gasp* act differently than the "norm" of our respected gender, then people quickly assume that we're gay or just plain weird. It's terrible, I know.

Please tell the police about what happened. That's really not cool at all!

 

For a guy....

Perfection

 

For a guy, when he's passionately kissing another guy.

Seriously though, I'm sorry for the harassment you've experienced. That is inhumane.

When I see people, men and women, I think some of them might be gay just by their looks and or mannerisms. I think generally it's when guys dress fashionably and look sharp and neat, but unfortunately too many straight guys do that too. For women I think short hair and sturdy bodies make me consider they might be lesbians. That's the best I can explain why I think some people might be gay just on first impressions. Of course I know those are stereotypes and they often prove not to be true. There is a great variety to how we look and that is good because my type probably isn't your type so we all can find the right one for us.

 

I have the same problem too. People sometimes ask me if im a boy or girl also. I guess the thing is that if you aren't fully gender conforming than people assume you must be somewhereon the lgbt+ spectrum

 

It's a stereotype but wearing fitted clothes even if you're not buff. I'm actually guilty of that, but it's part of the "East Asian Hipster style."

This is why I call it a stupid stereotype because a third of the guys at my school wear that kind of style and if people think that's gay, then that's pretty cool. A third of the guys at my school must be gay, right?

 

Haha! I'm guilty of that stereotype too. Many straight guys however dress this way. I shop a lot at A&F, AE, and Hollister, and they're clothes are rather tight. It's a terrible stereotype, but hey, guys look better in tight clothing

Also, I too have been targeted. Even when I was deeply closeted (and homophobic) and pretended to act as "straight" as possible, people thought that I was gay. I don't get it. Maybe my mannerisms? Again, a stereotype, but I apparently play into that one as well.

 

For me, mostly other gay or bi people seem to think of me as gay, even at the time I was closeted and repressed.
It's probably because of certain stereotypes (some of which can be true for some people and some not for others) which mainly circle around gender roles and stereotypes and all the gender coding that goes on (which means boys do this and girls do that).

Maybe you should ask a friend who knows about you why he thinks that is. I remember a lesbian friend of mine, telling me I was so butch, she was surprised I could like cute stuff (and I do have long hair). I'd never thought of me like that.
So maybe ask someone.
Other than that, threats like that are no laughing matter. Keep safe.

 

In my experience, most of the gay guys I've seen act very flamboyantly and feminine. I'm not saying that this is a correct way of telling whether a guy is gay or not, it's just how it's always turned out for me.

 

that is flawed though. most masculine guys i have encountered are actually gay. i have noticed this especially at my gym. tons of closeted gay very macho-like gays. i know this because apparently i've been told by a few people that i am quite attractive (i am masculine myself) and i find myself being starred at quite often by these "macho" guys. it's a feeling i get that i am being starred at rather than just looking at someone. most of the time as i glace around i find these guys just starring which they obviously quickly look away when they see they were noticed looking. this has happened countless times to me.

if i had to guess there are TONS more masculine macho-like acting guys that are gay than there are feminine gay. for every gay fem guy you see, there are probably 3-5 macho-like guys in the background

 

Based on what I've experienced: If a man has an effeminate voice and/or effeminate mannerisms.

With me, I've been accused of being gay for being a "female" who happened to be tomboyish.

 

I don't think you can normally tell.

However I do think some more femme guys have a facial "posture" that can lead people to think they are more feminine, and then going off stereotypes deduce they are gay. I don't think this is a genetic thing, just assumed expressions and body language perhaps adopted by subconsciously mimicking female friends?

An example. In this photo actor Andrew Rannels has more of a neutral facial expression. I wouldn't know if he was gay or straight based on seeing him there.

However in this photo to me he looks more feminine, probably from the highly arched brows, fully open eyes, full flash of teeth. Its kind of a very surprised look, and I think women tend to be a bit more expressive with their whole face hence why we infer femininity.

Its just one of those things, like posture, how people walk, talk, accents etc. I think these things tend to be just something people pick up from people around you. Nothing wrong with it. We all have our differences.

 

Does it mean if you trip someone else's gaydar you're probably at least bi?
Could it be, you unconsciously try to appeal to the same sex?
(Unconciously if you're closeted or in denial.)

 

No one thinks I'm anything but straight, so XD

And I apparently have no gaydar?

 

Bigots make people "look gay"

 

Getting with someone of the same gender.

 

While not all gay people fall into certain stereotypes, or exhibit any typical "gay traits", I sure do. Chip is 100% right. Acting straight, or "manning up" isn't worth it. It has only caused me stress, loneliness, and regret. I should have accepted myself sooner. I would have been MUCH happier than I am now.

 

"Looking gay" solely depends on cultral views.

What "looks gay" in one country looks straight in another.