How has your dress sense/style changed since you came out? Has how you dress changed much, or is it pretty much the same? I always felt pressure to conform and dress like the straight girl I have tried to be. When I was a teenager, I wasn't really that bothered with my appearance, but it was my mum who tried to get me to dress in more girly, brighter clothes. She also got me to wear make up (and still does - even now at the age of 31!). You can see a picture of me as a teenager here: When I look at the picture now - in a way I think - how did I not know I wasn't straight! So, now I'm trying to get back to dressing more androgynously when I'm in the mood to do so, but in a way it feels quite contrived, almost as much as dressing overly girly to compensate. I just feel so self conscious! So today I blatantly look butch, because I just don't want to dress like a girl; I just don't feel girly.
Unfortunately your image seems to be broken. I am in the early stages of coming out still. I've been thinking about trying to change my look, but I'm not sure quite what to do with myself. Mainly because I have always been very lazy about my clothing and appearance and I want to try to start dressing a bit nicer, both to feel better about myself and to hopefully eventually find a girlfriend. I know nothing about fashion, though, nor do I have a lot of expendable income, so I'm at a bit of a loss. I don't feel I want to go "butch" as that's not really me, but I'm not sure high femininity is me, either. So I guess I'm in a similar position as you!
Well when I was a teen I didn't care much for my appearance but, I was going through depression , I also didn't want the guys I went to school with to notice me . As I'm starting to come out now ,I'm going back to the person I always was very feminine , I wear make up most of time , I don't wear dresses , but I want to as well as skirts ( I just hadn't had the time to go shopping for new ones ) Well I've just gotten more feminine and that's just the real me I'm not ashamed of intimidated to be my true self anymore . I can't see your picture either .
Yep! And that is pretty much how I still dress now, except I have long hair, and my shirts usually have something arty or nerdy on them. Today I'm covered in leaping jackalopes. I think you should dress how you feel most comfortable. And maybe when you're trying out a new style it'll feel a little odd at first, so perhaps it'll take some time to ease in? I wonder if there are any good "alt fashion" or even "lesbian fashion" blogs out there anyone could recommend?
Many have a natural sense of style... not what is sold as fashion but what fits their type etc. Its often what we feel comfortable in. You just might try out a few styles... elegant trousers, for example, combined with nice blouses... Style can be found with reasonable priced clothing, too... and sometimes its preferable not to have many, but a few good pieces. I bought a while second hand, one reason was they have been already washed and you know how it fits. I'd buy from really reputable sources though.
Yes - it does. Someone commented today (who is gay himself, and knows I've been leaning more towards women lately), said "so are you trying out the butch weekend look?" I felt so self conscious and muttered - "hmm just trying it out...". I'm thinking going back to what used to be a staple of mine before - shirt, jumper and jeans - but maybe upgrading it to be a bit classier like here. Need to find some good chinos...
Hm, good point. I think some inspiration could help me, though, as I have a hard time really knowing where to start. I am not really big on dress trousers, I prefer skirts or casual-ish dresses if I'm to "dress up." Is there something in between dress slacks and jeans I could try? I have a few skirts but I guess perhaps the problem is I'm picky as I don't find many I like. I have an odd body type to buy for, I'm very short but not particularly skinny. I find tops fairly easily, but bottoms are harder because I'm a "pear" shape and have wide hips. That might be one of the girlist paragraphs I've ever written :lol:. Maybe I'll try shopping second hand and see if I come upon anything that way, that is a good idea! We have a couple of thrift shops in town. Haha, nothing wrong with trying some different styles out. Did he like it? And how did you feel in it? Sorry, what is a jumper? I like that look you linked to, classy and masculine but not overly so.
I would recommend: Fit for a Femme (femme fashion) http://femmboy.tumblr.com/ (tomboy femme) The Androgynous Femme (androgynous femme) Qwear (androgynous butch) And various mixtures of gender expressions: dapperQ Queering Style Also look on pinterest for androgynous, tomboy, tomboi, lesbian, and queer style. ERm I may be a little obsessed with androgyny. I'm trying to figure out how to do it best while looking professional.
Thanks! I'm not sure what sort of style fits me just yet, so having this variety to look through is great.
As soon as I experienced same-sex attraction, I felt relief that I had an excuse not to be so femme; as a straight girl I felt the pressure to dress one way. I cut my hair like right away, and slowly embraced some more androgynous styles. That photo of you is adorable by the way. I used to have the same haircut when I was 10, before i got to middle school and tried to fit in. When I look at pictures from then, I have the same "how did i not know i was straight" reaction. Eventually your style will feel more comfortable. I'm still waiting to feel 100% comfortable and unselfconscious about what I'm wearing; but it's gotten easier. ---------- Post added 9th Aug 2014 at 02:39 PM ---------- You don't have to have one type of style either; instead of boxing yourself in you can have different styles for different occasions.
I've changed some, to a comfortable and don't care if I match thing. Would use to wear only name brand junk, but now im more of video game/band t-shirt attire. Black and neon.... o.o
Sometimes I feel like I dress too feminine, but I love fashion so much and I could never imagine myself dressing any other way.
Very good point. Some days I feel more masculine or more feminine, lazier or dressier, and so on. I don't necessarily want my dress to come off as "queer" or "butch" or "femme," I just need some ideas on where to start in terms of what's "current" in the fashion world, and your links are definitely helpful
