partner?

I always thought it seemed kind of impersonal as well, but it didn't bother me so much.

 

Maybe 'partner' is more common here in the UK than in other countries? It's a fairly common term to describe a significant other who you're in a long-term relationship with, but not married to. Both straight and gay couples might refer to their significant other as their partner.

I agree that it sounds a bit clinical and impersonal, but it's a term that's relatively free of baggage, I suppose.

 

It's used by lots of people. My mum called her husband her partner before they married.

---------- Post added 16th Aug 2014 at 10:42 PM ----------

beat me to that one! But I agree with you

 

You are far from alone...but I'm not with you.

Partner describes pretty exactly my relationship with my significant other. She is not a wife; there is no ownership here. She is not a girlfriend; after 28 years, we can safely say we're more than friends. We share everything, including our bed, including bringing in income, including the income we bring in, including household chores, including fantasies, dreams, and goals. Neither of us is "the dominant one"...we're partners. That sounds like it lacks intimacy to you? LOL, you don't know us!

 

I think adults sometimes might think girlfriend or boyfriend are high school terms and want something that sounds more grown up, more sophisticated.. I wouldn't wanna be in a same sex or hetro relationship at say say age 40 and be calling that person my girl or boyfriend, sounds too young and immature to me.

 

I also say "my boyfriend" or "the guy that I'm dating". I feel like partner is impersonal. A lab partner, partners in crime, partners in a group, those can be anyone. But your boyfriend/girlfriend is that one special person with whom you share a unique bond. For that reason, I don't like to use "partner" in reference to my significant other, in my opinion.

 

In my case it's a matter of preference. I'd rather call him a partner than boyfriend. I've never really liked the word boyfriend, partner sounds better for me.

 

This exactly. I use the word partner to describe my significant other of 16 years, not because I lack another word but because for me it describes how we are--partners, in everything. I occasionally use husband although frankly I have issues with the institution of marriage and would prefer not to use the term and boyfriend just seems silly: we're in our forties, have been together for 16 years and own a home together--I'm not crossing my fingers hoping he'll take me to the prom!:lol:

 

I'd prefer just to flat out say boyfriend rather than partner unless he also happens to be my partner as we clean up the gritty mean streets of my town of 120 or so people one high-speed chase at a time. I look forward to the day I get to say boyfriend so I'll be sure to use it.

 

Meh, I never liked the "partner" term, thats why I think the traditional girlfriend/boyfriend, fiance, wife/husband is more sufficient because if thats how you feel and see it, then thats how it will be.

 

No offense taken, friend! And I'm glad I've been able to help expand your thinking.

I think gf/bf works fine for a new relationship. If you don't have issues with the ownership/dominance-based institution of marriage (particularly mf marriage...but that's what same-sex marriage is based on), then wife/husband works, I guess.

But I think that when the relationship is egalitarian and long term, "partnership" (both for same-sex and hetero couples) can be a viable word to describe it. It's not business...it is an intimate partnership...but a partnership.

Lots of people have trouble with egalitarianism, though...they *want* a dominance notion in their relationship. To some people, business partnership *enforces* a kind of egalitarianism that doesn't feel natural to them, so they'd never want it in a personal relationship. But for some of us, it's just how our relationships go.

 

I feel the exact same way! I hate the term partner, it like you said it makes me think of two people who are in business together. I'm dating a girl and when I talk about her I call her my girlfriend, because that seems more intimate to me.

 

I tend to use 'partner' because, well, I have no idea who I'll wind up with. It's more of a placeholder really, and saves space. Of course, if I was with someone, it'd be a little more direct.

However, I like biAnnika's response about 'partner'. Maybe I'll keep on using it...

 

I prefer to be called partner or significant other as opposed to boyfriend because I'm not male, despite passing as it

 

Yeah, partner does sound kinda impersonal. To me, a 'partner' is someone you're working on your science fair project with...

But I see how the word is useful, since it's gender-neutral. It can be applied to non-binary people, and people in general when you're trying not to specify.

If I were dating a girl, I would call her my girlfriend... unless I didn't want someone to know I was with a girl, then I would use 'partner'.

 

it doesn't feel impersonal to me. *shrug*

whatever works for you and your significant other(s) or partner(s) or whatever