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Should we confess our feelings...

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by emc2, Sep 8, 2014.

  1. emc2

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    When we like someone, they would always be on our mind, right? Most occasions we wouldn't be able to think clearly, right? So, should we confess our feelings to them? I was wondering if confessing to them would sort of bring back clarity to a blurry mind. What do you think?
     
  2. Wilzyax

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    Tell her first about your own sexuality and see how she respond, does she support you or not. And from there you can decide if you want to confess your feeling.... My experience is that I might wouldn't have loosen my best friend if I have told him about my sexuality, because I assumed he shut me out because he thought I wouldn't understand if he struggled with his own feeling.
    For instance; if she does like (and think you're straight), than she probable will distance herself more and more for you, so she won't have to face rejection from you later. So she reject you instead so she can keep control of her feelings....
    But if she isn't gay, but you are a good friend, she would most likely appreciate your honesty, as long as you tell her that it does not have anything with her to do.
    So I think you should start with, "hey, since we are so good friends there is something I have to tell you." Tell her your gay, but make it sound like this is something you tell all your close friends, so she think that your just telling her because you trust her enough. That way you want face the awkwardness for her being afraid of you (if she is straight)...

    I know the thread is old, but hope it helps a little anyway :wink:
     
  3. shinji

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    Clarity... no. Should you confess though, yes... I mean, someone has to, eventually. Might as well be you.

    Do be warned though, to not "over-confess". And take note to see if the other person is receptive of your confession.
     
  4. biAnnika

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    My experience with such confessions is that you should only do it if you want/intend to move to a deeper stage of relationship...not just to gain clarity.

    You *can* gain clarity that way...but generally, if you *don't* intend to move to a deeper stage of relationship, the clearer vision is frequently along the lines of "oh shit...I just totally jeopardized our friendship, and it will almost certainly end within the year".
     
  5. Argentwing

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    When I first liked somebody so much that it basically tossed my brain in a blender, I was hardly in any shape to tell her. And I also wasn't mature enough to be able to plan out what I was going to say in advance. Suffice to say my pursuit of her didn't go well.
     
  6. heyguyswhatsup

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    You should, because it takes a weight off your shoulders.

    However, be conscious of how close you are to one another. You wouldn't tell an acquaintance you've walked past in the corridor five times this past week, that you're gay/into them.

    Best method is to ease into it/take things slowly. Make them aware of your sexuality and watch how they react. If they're into you, their eyes are going to sparkle at the words anyone/they are afraid to confess to.
     
  7. kageshiro

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    Everything would be alot easier this way for sure. But if there's a risk of hurting someone I wont do it
     
  8. mbanema

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    This is one of the few areas where I'm always pretty assertive (not that this is a frequently-occurring situation). I don't really know what I hope to accomplish since I'm not out, but I don't think I've ever really liked someone and not let them know it. It puts yourself in an incredibly vulnerable position, but I'd rather deal with the potential pain of being completely shot down than to just wonder endlessly and eventually look back with regret that you never took a chance.