Can you be incapable of love?

Have you considered that you were aromantic?

Aromantic people just don't feel romantic attraction, but it doesn't mean they're incapable of love! I have an aromantic friend and she says she loves her friends - just platonically. :lol:

But, it's possible that you just haven't met the right person yet.

I don't really believe the "to love, you must first love yourself" saying because a lot of people on here probably have the shittiest self esteem, but they still love others very, very much.

Don't worry too much about it. You've lived through two decades and a year, sure, but that's still very young. Take your time. It'll be okay. (*hug*)

 

basically

I personally find awkwardness pretty cute, even though I'm awkward as hell myself. Sometimes you can try telling them the truth - that you feel a bit awkward and that you aren't sure of what to say.

And you've experienced many things in your years. It's not too late to do something with your life now, especially since you have a bit more freedom, being a legal adult and all.

 

sure

 

The "social life" is not for everyone, some do not enjoy it that much. Some prefer few good friends rather than a bunch of friends. Don't worry about that.

I honestly don't believe you're incapable of love, I think you're just a little shy/anxious.

I do think, however, that one can be incapable of love, but I don't think that's the case for you.

 

I feel the same way. I am a very social person, but I've never dated anyone, or kissed anyone (and also a virgin).

I struggle with flirting with people or asking people out.

 

Problems connecting with people, or no interest in romance, doesn't suggest an inability to love. The ability to love and the state of being in a relationship are completely different things. Relationships don't always come around when you want them.

 

I think it's almost impossible to even think about entering into a relationship before coming out to yourself. If you only achieved that a few months ago, I wouldn't worry not having found love yet. Do you desire to be in a relationship? Do you want someone close to you, to love you in that way? If so, I wouldn't worry about being incapable of love.

I didn't start to come to terms with myself until I was maybe 23/24. In high school I might as well have been asexual. I didn't have conscious sexual or romantic thoughts. In reality, I was very attracted to other guys, I just didn't have the ability to recognize what was going on. These feelings started really manifesting themselves in college, when I really started yearning for someone to be close to me, but I had to come out before I could truly make a connection and form a relationship.

Bottom line, I would just give yourself some more time. I don't think there's any cause for concern yet.

 

I agree with Hexagon, here.

I'd like to add, unless you're naturally a bad person, then you probably aren't incapable of love. I'm beginning to see, that love, it isn't for me. So, yes, it might be possible, when it comes to being incapable of love, but not for you, confuseduser99. But only if you have little to no love to give, would I start worrying. The fact you want it, is a good first sign that, you are capable of love.

 

I think there is something in the comment about needing to love yourself, but I don't think that's all there is to it.

I'm not sure if anybody is incapable of love, but you've got to want it.. to really desire it and feel/feed that desire and when you finally have love you need to nurture it. I certainly think some people are too self centred for love.

Some people need their independence and freedom before they feel comfortable enough to go 'looking' for love. There is no doubt that living at home with parents cramps your style and I wonder if that may be part of the problem for you confuseduser99? What do you think?

 

I believe i am quite incapable.

 

Yes, you can.

 

This is pretty much my life, too.

I think it is difficult for people who have spent much of their teenage and early adult life in the closet, because you've missed out on the subtleties and rules of dating the same sex. It's hard, but if you want to find love, then you can't say you're incapable of it

 

Yes, but it doesn't sound like that fits you. Sounds more like social anxiety

 

Yes.

I believe there are many reasons why this can happen.

While it doesn't affect all that many people, there are some people who just don't fall in love. It is what it is. Some people worry about it and some people don't. For some, not being able to be intimate is stressful. For others, they value being connected to people as friends and putting together a support system that way.

 

I don't really like relationships. I don't really want a partner, nor do I want friends, nor do I love my family. I couldn't care less of everyone died, I just like being alone [This has obviously been caused by a mental disorder].
Yet, I don't consider you can really be "incapable of love". I love objects, like stuffed animals and my computer(I even name them and talk to them).
You probably love your family and friends, and you want to be in a relationship, you just haven't found the "right person".
Are we incapable of loving someone as a partner? Yes. Are we incapable of loving another human being? Yes. Are we incapable of loving? I don't think so. There's always someone or something, the "ability to love" is part of the human being(if any of this doesn't really make sense, it's because it's 07:30 and I haven't slept all night(Sleeping Pattern Disorder))

P.S: I'm aware it all sounds kinda creepy

 

Possibly. You could be asexual/aromantic, ya know...