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Do lots of people go through a phase during their teens?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Ryujin, Sep 19, 2014.

  1. Ryujin

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    When I came out to my dad, one of the things he said was that lots of teens have go through a phase if thinking they are not straight. Is there any truth to this and if so, how long would the phase last?

    If you have any answers, thanks in advance for posting.
     
  2. Fallingdown7

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    I think It's mostly bullshit and is mostly used to invalidate someone's sexual orientation. To some extent, It's true that a lot of teens go through curious/questioning phases, but this can include heterosexuality as well. I went through a phase of being straight/bisexual until I learned otherwise at 19
     
  3. HM03

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    I too think it's mostly bs.

    Nobody I know has ever mentioned or talked about a phase. Maybe it's just me, but wouldn't most people going through a phase be too scared to say anything, and when it passed be like thank god :lol:?
     
  4. AKTodd

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    Nope, it's not a phase. The idea that it is is based on a desperate desire not to accept it.

    If you want to answer the question of how long this 'phase' will last - figure it will last as long as you live.

    Give your dad time and hopefully he'll come around.

    Todd
     
  5. NobodyKnowsHer

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    I think it's kinda dumb for people to think it's just a phase. If people can go through phases where they think they're gay, does that mean they can go through phases where they think they're straight, too?
     
  6. June Cleaver

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    it's no phase, now I understand young teen boys will Jack off together etc like children playing Dr. I always knew I was female, told I was gay,etc to find out I really a female half way body wise but 100% female in spirit! if I conformed I would have destroyed some lovely lady's life by marrying and putting us both in divorce. I knew what I am and always have, at 42 I still am a female though at 5 my parents explained I was like dad not mom. only you know your spirit! June
     
  7. Michael

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    He is not accepting it, probably because he is scared. I won't insist on it, seeing he is not receptive about what/how you feel.

    If you are asking at what age you'll definitely know who and what you are... That depends on you and your circumstances. You can be sure at 13, and then you hit your 20s and make a discovery about yourself.

    When I hit puberty I knew exactly how I felt about my sexual orientation, and that hasn't changed much. Then at 23-24 I made an amazing discovery that prevented me from becoming sexually frustrated. And now, at 30, I'm dealing with my gender...

    Everybody is different, and things change as you change. The best you can do is try to be honest about how you feel in every moment, with every idea it comes to your mind, and give yourself time to process and explore everything.
     
  8. Blossom85

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    I do believe it is a way for people to invalidate someone's sexuality or a way for them to be in denial about their child etc coming out as being gay.. They tell themselves it will be okay in the end as they will eventually go back to being straight and 'normal' in their opinion.. It is BS in my eyes as well..
     
  9. alwaysforever

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    I think it's B.S. to call it a phase. Attraction is not a phase. Calling it so is mostly a way of invalidating what someone is experiencing. It makes people doubt themselves and does a lot of damage.
     
  10. Kaiser

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    I think there are isolated incidents, at best. But as a whole, no, not in the context established here.

    Now, in terms of rebellion, or just challenging authority in some manner, that might have a little more weight. When it comes to sexuality, there isn't really enough, in my opinion, to warrant upon it the phase label.
     
  11. stocking

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    I went through a phase when I was a teenager I call it denial.:lol:
     
  12. Wuggums47

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    "Dad, my doctor said I have a diabetes"
    "Don't worry son, you're just going through a phase"
     
  13. ccdd

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    I've never met a straight person of my age (30) or thereabouts who claims to have had a gay phase as a teenager and who now identities as completely straight.

    I know some bi people (myself included) who thought it was a phase, but then later realised it was a very long one, or realised it wasn't after they had same-sex attraction again after a long-term straight relationship broke up.

    And every single gay or bi or non-straight person I know in real life was told it was probably a phase and/or believed themselves it was a phase when they were a teenager.

    Therefore I think it can be true, but that it's less true than everyone would have us believe. I clinged to that idea for dear life as a teenager.

    I think the poster above who mentioned 'isolated cases' is probably true. I do wonder though how many people with these 'isolated cases' find that the question rears its head again when they are 30, 40, or 70.

    Also: If anything, I had a straight phase, as my longest straight crush happened as a teenager lol.
     
  14. Hexagon

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    It's a stupid idea. Phases of fashion, sure, but sexuality is pretty much biological. Your body doesn't just decide to go through a rebellious teenage phase of liking a different gender.
     
  15. Browncoat

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    I'm inclined to believe that any "straight" person that tells me they went through a "gay phase" as a kid isn't actually straight. :wink:
     
  16. ScatteredEarth

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    I don't believe that phases DON'T exist, because there are cases in which people can and have experienced weird attractions to things at random, and then never thought like that again.

    But for the most part, whenever someone tells you you're just in a phase, they are potentially trying to put you in a phase themselves, the phase called denial.