Has this ever happened to anyone else?

Uh, how is that type of person " friendly " or even decent ? And my advice always when it comes to that s&*#t (holy types) stay the F away b c usually in my experience they're far from " nice " . Just my opinion man .

 

There are some otherwise nice people who are homophobic, usually because they don't understand it and we're taught that it's wrong. I generally try to stay away from them, because you can't really argue with them. The fact that they're nice but still homophobic shows that they're pretty cemented in that.

 

I think sometimes we underestimate people.. Even if that person is homophobic, it could be simply cause it's a learned thing from parents or other family.. And they don't wanna be seen to be going against their families beliefs as their family might believe them to be gay. They might just not understand and that I think is where the root of all fear lies.. From the unknown. It would be hard forming a friendship with someone being scared they will reject you if you tell them who you really are and it's up to you to decide if it's worth it to lose a potential friend or hide yourself away.

 

yea

 

I agree with Blossom's comments about how homophobia can be a 'learnt' thing from family without ever really facing or considering the possibilities of it being presented to them in their life.

Sometimes people change their viewpoints and realise something very astute when they come face-to-face with it. In the same way you say this person is great but homophobic; they could turn around and think a similar thing about you - and it could be a catalyst to get them re-thinking their opinions and views.

I have had equal measures of friends and acquaintances in college, flatmates, etc where I have made the decision to not bring up sexuality or engage in conversations about homosexuality because we would reach an impasse.

 

Not really to be honest. I have some friendly religious friends who are uncomfortable with aspects of homosexuality (they're against same-sex marriage...ergh) but if I came out to them they wouldn't really care/it wouldn't change our friendship. If someone I met was outright horrible concerning LGBT people I wouldn't really see them as "friendly" but more "two-faced" or fake

 

Yeah, that's something I've come across before. Sometimes I'm even on the way to becoming good friends with them, having never mentioned politics or religion, when they'll suddenly say something racist/homophobic/extremely religious and kind of shock me with their unexpected blast of intolerance.

I'll admit, it's harder for me to like them after that. Usually I back away from the friendship and consider trying again in a year or two, in hope that they'll calm down or have a change of heart. I know a lot of really intolerant high schoolers who softened waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay up in college. Total 180s. So... it can happen. They just need a new perspective.

 

My best friend of seven years turned out to be a mega-homophobe. I still haven't come out to her, but I understand how you feel. I don't think there is anything you can really- she doesn't sound like the type of person to listen to reason.
Sorry, bro.

 

Yeah, there was this one time that one person in my school that I thought might have been a halfway decent person that I might have ended up being on decent terms with. That was until I heard him go on a rant claiming that not only same sex relationships are sinful but included interracial relationships in the mix. Seems that anyone can be a religious wingnut these days...