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What Feeling Do You Know Best?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Kaiser, Oct 5, 2014.

  1. Kaiser

    Kaiser Guest

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    I seem to be on a roll with these topics, and that is okay. I like making them, and I enjoy reading over the responses.

    The objective of this thread is, like the others, pretty straight forward. What feeling do you know best? For example, do you experience/know depression, anger, or happiness? Do you experience two feelings, about evenly?

    The primary reason I ask this is, because I struggle with two particular feelings, almost daily. I wanted to know if anybody else, seemed to be on a first name basis with any particular emotion/feeling/mood.
     
  2. Argentwing

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    A combination of happiness for others' achievements and gloom/anger at myself for not quite getting there. It's something that dogs me frequently.

    Other than that, the feeling I have most is thankfulness for what I do have. On the grand scheme of things, I have been extraordinarily lucky.
     
  3. TigerInATophat

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    Amusement. I seem to have daily bouts of finding little silly things funny. Even if it's just a recollection of something that made me laugh before so sometimes I'll be going about grinning to myself. I'm waiting for some stranger to ask 'What are you smiling about?' just so that I can say 'They'll never guess where I've hidden those Humbold penguins!' or something to that effect.

    Apathy. Contrary to my cheerfulness I also find it difficult to get through doing anything. This is made worse in some ways by being physically tired due to health problems, responsibilities etc but truth be told I actually struggled with it even as a teenager when I had the energy. I get bored too easily and used to be tempted to do stupid things just to keep myself entertained, fortunately I have enough self preservation instinct that I never went through with anything particularly inadvisable. I still find it difficult to deal with people socially and life though, I had hoped this would get a bit better as I got older but I still find myself frustrated by the monotony that most people my age appear to naturally settle into. On the other hand I know in truth I would not like to be a sheep just going along with things without questioning the point, so I wouldn't want to change at that cost.
     
  4. Blossom85

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    Your topics are always really amazing and make me think about my answers.

    I usually go through feeling happy/thankful to sad/lonely all the time, to the point where one moment I could be really happy and accepting of myself and thankful of what I have and where I am to the next moment being in tears cause I feel sad and lonely and why don't I have someone to share my life with yet.
     
  5. Hexagon

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    Depression, probably.
     
  6. Quem

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    Happiness and joy without a doubt. :icon_bigg
     
  7. Nikky DoUrden

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    I haven't calculated but I want to promote the happy feelings, thus i'll say that mostly when hanging/talking with friends im mostly happy, and usually I laugh about a lot of things in life so theres that as well !

    And all bad feelings not worth mentioning!
     
  8. alwaysforever

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    This is such a tough question! My work requires me to be in touch with my emotions on a regular basis. I try and explore as many facets of what I feel as I can. It's so hard to pinpoint which emotions I know best. I am very familiar with loneliness. She and I have become almost the same face at times. At the same time though, I have known happiness and joy as well. Fear and I are on a first name basis, and sadness was all too familiar to me as a young adult.
     
  9. redneck

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    Loneliness oh how I know thee. You torment me constantly causing depression and apathy.

    The other emotion I'm on a first name basis with is anger. There is a full blown rage monster hiding just below the surface and I can feel him seething even when I'm in a good mood. I do the best i can to keep him at bay. He lashes out quite frequently though and on occasions that he fully escapes I'm usually left looking around at the destruction he caused not knowing what really happened.
     
  10. SeaSalt

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    Without trying to sound too miserable probably Despair.

    Im either super happy with a great big stupid grin on my face or I am like I am now with pasty white skin and despair in my heart. Sadly I spend most of my time like this however it is normally preceded by moments of incredible clarity where I know exactly what I want to do with my life and I get these huge illusions of grandeur. I think it could be put down to a fear of living a normal life.
     
  11. ChloeKiss

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    Anxiety, Anger and Happiness. Some days it's one over the other.
     
  12. Alder

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    Anxiety and determination, mostly
     
  13. tulipinacup

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    Feelings I know best are usually the ones who react first in a given situation. I hate to admit it but the feeling of getting nervous is something I always struggle with. I get nervous easily and what I dislike most about it is that people can tell just by looking at my face but what makes it interesting is that in a rare occasion it helps me to sort of manipulate people without trying even the ones who are difficult to work with. It's not something I like at all.
     
  14. Kaiser

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    There are a few feelings and moods, that come and go, but two, through everything, have remained with me...

    The first of which is:




    A N G E R
    [​IMG]




    Anger is was my means of energy. It is was my primary driving force, because it provided me a tremendous amount of energy, in such a ridiculously short amount of time. Anger allows allowed me to feel as if I have life, but not in the same way as passion or responsibility does. It gives gave me life, in the sense, of allowing me to believe my own hype -- that I am entitled to whatever I want. If I cannot get it through calm and soothing means, anger is was more willing to step in, and show me that nothing else worked; or should even be attempted. If I got angry enough, my opposition would either back down and submit what I sought, or they would be utterly broken, to the point, I didn't need what I sought anymore -- I already had their misery to feast upon, and that was a fair trade.

    Anger blinded me to the damage I am was doing, to others and to myself. It justified this, by giving me a constant warmth, constant results, and constant bouts of invincibility. Each time I would lash out, life seemed to bow to me, and after a few times of this, it seemed pretty clear (to me):

    Get mad enough, and anything is your's. If somebody decides to step up, let them -- knocking them on their ass, is just what you need. It'll show, it is futile to stand against you, and that it is better to just give when ordered to do so.

    Though I do a much better job at checking my anger, now, it still exists. I feel it lurking around, deep within, and it usually radiates, in each and every word or act I do, in varying degrees. Some confuse this with conviction or speaking with confidence, when it is really, the anger leaving the confines of my soul. It is easy to make this mistake, but it isn't a wise one.

    Why did/do I have this anger?

    Life, in general.
    My sexuality, with the gender identity on top.
    The past, the present, and the future; thoughts, regrets, and so on.
    Struggling between what comes naturally to me, vs. what I can do very well.

    When I was younger, it stemmed from a desire to, never again, be placed in a situation akin to being bullied. It stemmed from a determination to, never again, be laughed at for the sheer amusement of some worthless cretins. It stemmed from a desperation to, never again, be thought of as 'just another victim/tally mark/piece of shit nobody'. I would rather destroy another person, than take a shot at my ego/self-worth, and if that meant digging myself in deeper emotional debt, so be it. I'd be the last one standing, and that is all that mattered, because those who can still stand, can still be.

    I know anger remarkably well. I know it's pros, it's cons; it's tricks, it's techniques. I know how it can make you believe, you are 'large and in charge', that you can do anything. And you can do anything, if you're willing to lose everything and everyone you know, because anger will burn them. It will even, if you allow it, take them. Anger only cares about feeding itself, to survive, so that it may continue to linger at the expense of something else -- be it your friends, your family, anything you love, or even your own well being and sense of self. It will gnaw away at you, and you won't know it, because you're too busy feeling this glorious sensation of raw power, of absolute godliness, to notice.

    Why give any concern to the loss of humanity, you've undergone? You're a god (in your anger-clouded mind) now, and caring only gets in the way of results. It is a small price to pay, you tell yourself, but the interest you accumulate from this purchase, is not, you will realize.




    Next Time: Apathy!




     
    #14 Kaiser, Oct 6, 2014
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2014
  15. Starfleet

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    Rage. Anger + shame = rage.

    When you have no ground to stand on, when everything you do is wrong - I even eat cereal wrong! - when you never know why people hate you, why you feel ugly, why trying harder doesn't get you anything but misery...

    Then you get rage. Turn rage inwards, and it's depression. Turn it towards others, and it's an addiction. I loved feeling powerful. I loved seeing people back away from me. I loved giving people that "don't fuck with me" look.

    But loving being angry didn't make anyone love me.
     
  16. topgear109

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    Depression mostly
     
  17. Candace

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    Happiness when I achieve something or when someone that I care about does, along with feeling vexed by people who lack either common sense or manners.
     
  18. One Man Army

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    Frustration, with myself.

    I judge myself way too harshly.
     
  19. Ouzo

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  20. Kriskluwe

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    Best: anger