You're too young to know

Fuck that bullshit.
I'm sure your mum is a nice person and all, but who is she to tell you that you can't know? She probably knew she was straight by 13.
I first knew I was bisexual when I was 7 - I remember telling my cousin, who angrily told me I was wrong. I forgot all about it, of course, until later on, but I still knew back then.
Age has nothing to do with it.

 

Hey, look I just came in so I haven't been able to follow and keep up on you WAYT thread but from what I've gathered so far you've received one of the classic parent responses to coming out, a response I also got as well as I'm sure many other people. In my opinion, I hate to hear those words even from my own parents because they are wrong. Age doesn't and shouldn't matter for us to know our own selves as human beings. If I were you I'd either give them some time before bringing up the matter and pressing harder that you aren't too young, that you have full capability of knowing your orientation, or even bring it up to them sooner that you disagree with what they said. Just don't give up your side of the argument, prove it to them that you aren't too young to know.

 

Sorry to hear it went that way. I hate when people generalize everyone and just make assumptions like this. You wont be 13 forever though, sooner or later she will realize the truth.

 

I think most people have a general idea. I certainly didn't know 100% when I was thirteen, as that's when I first got an inkling that I may not be straight, but I think other people are capable of knowing for sure at that age. Everyone is different. I'm sorry you had a bad experience.

 

You know when you know, it may be wise to wait a while but if you have a strong belief you are your old enough

 

I was always oblivious to my homosexuality. In retrospect, it was really REALLY obvious. Anyway I figured it out when I was 13. There was probably like a month of denial before I accepted it and I haven't questioned it since. So, you can definitely know at 13.

 

I knew that I was gay by the time I was 12. So I'm sure you know. I do have to say I was watching a commercial for some tv show that comes on nickelodeon and it was for younger kids who were coming out on oct 11. And when watching the commercial it was hard to believe some of these kids already knew even though there were about the same age I was when I found out. So I can understand how some people can find it hard to believe at such a young age.

 

I get the exact same thing! Up until this summer, my whole extended family treated me like a child! I mean, I may have been one, but you don't have to make it so obvious! It also annoys me when my older friends are talking, and I join the conversation, and they stop talking! If you're older than me and you read this, you need to not do this. *Sigh* Rant over. :icon_wink

 

I knew then. I wish I could have admitted it, even to myself. Ignore these people who say they they know your heart and mind better then yourself.

 

Stupid for one reason: no one EVER says it about heterosexuals. No one is ever "too young" to know they are heterosexual. So why would it be any different with non-heterosexuals?

 

I think when you know.. You know.. If you are questioning, then that is okay to do.. You can explore and think about it, yet if you know for sure.. It isn't up to anyone else to tell you that you can't be sure or you are too young.. I'm sorry that your mum feels that way, it is sad when people question you when you know you are one thing, yet if you were straight.. No one would say you are too young to know that.. That is the annoying thing.

 

That's the most valid point of that entire discussion. Regarding sexuality though I do think some people know earlier than others. I defiantly think though that you are likely to know if you're not 100% straight by the end of your sexual peak. Some people know at 5, some people know at 13, and some know at 40. It's different for every person. When ya know you know.

 

Realize that people are stupid, and you should take this fact into account. Just cut your mom some slack, you can't expect her to suddenly follow your own trail of thoughts on the matter, after all she hasn't had the time to fully assimilate this "change" into her idea of "normal".

Just don't push her, allow for the idea to sink into her head and when she is ready, she will talk to you on equal terms.

 

That's so silly. People can and do indeed develop romantic feelings well before puberty. And if these people have crushes on the opposite sex never will a parent say "oh you're too young to know you're not gay. You are probably gay." It's just ignorance and denial speaking, ignore it! The people who are educated are standing by you

 

I don't think she should have said flat out that you're too young, but I can see where she's concerned. Humanity wasn't brought up believing that LGBT people were normal equals. We've always been shunned or accused of sinning by one person or another, or alien. Being LGBT is normal, but in society, it's not "the norm." If it were, no one would hate us and no one would question us. So, by saying "Heterosexuals knew at that age, why not us?" I take it as viewing LGBTs as a normal in society, which we are not. Heterosexuality has always been around; and homosexuality has as well, but everyone knows less about it than heterosexuality. I can't find the words for what I'm trying to say, but straight people never had to "question" anything because of this norm we've put in everyone's heads. The LGBT people HAVE had to question themselves. That's why I think that argument is irrelevant. But what your mom said was quite adamant, which wasn't the best response. She could have said to be careful and not jump into things too quickly instead of completely denying you. That's my opinion on it.

 

It isn't about your age, it's a form of denial. Nothing to do with you really.

 

You know what you are RIGHT NOW; what she is saying, out of denial, is that you may feel differently at some point in the future, which may or may not turn out to be true, but it does not affect how you feel NOW. If you decide later that you are more gay than bi, or hetero enough to live the straight life side of bi, then that is how you will feel THEN. You have to ignore what other people are trying to tell you and go with what you feel at the present time, because that is when and where you have to live day by day; if they don't want to believe what you tell them, that is their problem to deal with, even if you end up feeling some consequences of their resistance.

 

Everyone develops differently. I'm 17 and only recently started questioning. If you have it sorted at 13, good for you man, and I'm sure your mum will be happy too once you give her some time to process it.

 

I'm fourteen, but i've known I was bi for at least two years. But i get the exact same thing from my parents 'you're too young'. This last year has been hell for me, okay, with all the tranny shit. Even if if it is just a phase (which it isn't) shouldn't they just give us the benefit of the doubt and give us some credit for knowing who we are?
~Gabe x