Separation between romantic and sexual attraction

Yes, it is possible.

 

I know a girl who is so perfect for me, it's nuts. We have everything in common, she adores me, I love being around her...problem is? She's a girl and I'm not even remotely sexually attracted to her. But I could honestly see being "romantically attracted" to her. But I'm not asexual, and the sexual/intimate aspect of a relationship is important to me, so that relationship would never really be able to go very far.

It's definitely possible, but for most people, sexual and romantic attractions are intertwined, lines are blurred, and it's not easy to separate.

 

It is totally possible. In fact, it's somewhat common.

I think it's easier for men to do this, but I'm not sure. It would be something interesting to read up on.

 

Yes, obviously it's possible. What you personally experience in sexual and romantic terms isn't grounds for understanding what everyone else does. If people say they experience a separation between sexual and romantic attraction, then they do.

It isn't just for asexuals, you know. A pansexual person, for example, is also panromantic, and sometimes you get sexualities and romantic orientations that don't quite match up.

 

I think I'd consider myself bisexual homoromantic, meaning I'm sexually and romantically attracted to girls but only sexually attracted to guys. I'm still questioning though.

My point is, yes, it is possible.

 

Yeah, it's definitely possible.

Romantic compatibility and sexual attraction are two different things, though obviously it helps when you feel both of them towards the same person. Lol

 

Definitely possible. While sometimes romantic and sexual are quite intricately intertwined, they are quite separate things.

I say this because I'm fairly certain asexuals can feel romantic attraction, and aromantics can feel sexual attraction, just as an example. I don't know for sure but I'm pretty certain that is the case, so sexual and romantic attraction clearly aren't the same thing, nor are they always the same for everyone.

Also- some people have different sexual and romantic identities, and it really clarifies things for a lot of people.

I mean, I'm fairly certain my sexual and romantic orientation isn't completely identical, though I'm still figuring that out. Some people can see themselves romantically involved and dating, loving, and adoring certain genders but not having sex with some or all of those genders, and other people can see themselves sexually involved with certain genders but not necessarily happy to be emotionally and romantically intimate with them.

It's a funny thing to figure out but those two-sexual and romantic orientation/attraction-are different things, at least in my opinion and experience. Realizing that actually helped clarify quite a few things for myself.

 

Totally. Before I accepted my orientation, I did date a couple of guys. The last guy I dated meant a lot to me, felt like more than a friend for sure but I did not want to do anything sexual with him at all.

 

Surely romantic attraction is just platonic? I have a strong, platonic desire to hug my mother and be around her, which some people argue is what romantic attraction is... but obviously I'm not romantically attracted to her.

I care strongly for a lot of my friends, in the way that I think many here would describe as romantic attraction, but it is 100% platonic, there is no attraction there.

I believe people here are confusing positive platonic relationships with romantic attraction.

As far as I'm aware it's not possible unless you're asexual. I've not seen any reason to think otherwise other than a lot of opinions on here.

 

It's definitely possible. I think romance and sexuality are two very different things, actually. It's when they're combined that it equals mad, crazy love. At least in my opinion.

Example, I have a friend who I began to realize I cared greatly for in a romantic way. I wanted to take care of her... take her on dates... do all the cute, romantic things. However, I never really thought of her in a sexual way. I just had these very romantic feelings towards her.

 

I've noticed that the most with bisexual people their sexual and romantic attraction doesn't all add up there are a few 50/50 bisexuals but there are a lot that lean one way or the other either more to the straight side or the gay side or only having romantic attraction and sexual attraction to one side but only having sexual to one side .

---------- Post added 19th Oct 2014 at 10:57 AM ----------

I agree with this a lot of people are confusing romantic attraction with platonic and it's surely not the same thing .

 

That sounds like a sister, which is a platonic relationship?

 

Except it wasn't.

 

hello all you lovely people!
really interesting question. i can't say i know the answer, but from personal experience i don't really find i need a label for my relationships. it seems like there are no two people i have the same sort of relationship with. i have different boundaries and diffrenent experiences with them all, and as long as we are both in agreement about the way our relationship is playing out and i'm not making anyone uncomfortable it works for me.
i'm aware that i don't speak for everyone though, and i'm sure there are people who want to know what category their relationships fall under, but i think it's important to make your own definitions for your labels so that they work for you and your life. maybe for you a romantic relationship is cuddling, talking and kissing; maybe for another it's entirely emotional with nothing physical
take care!

 

It makes perfect sense to me.

One of my friends is a Bisexual Heteroromantic, meaning while he can and does feel Sexually attracted to both sexes he only feels romantic attraction for women.

I am a Demiromantic Pansexual.

I think most people have a romantic orientation that is fairly similar if not the same to their sexual orientation, thus why some people don't seem to see the need for a distinction.

 

Yes, It's possible.

I think romantic attraction is different than platonic....It's more heavy and passionate, even if it isn't always sexual. For example, some people may have sex with their friends (friends with benefits) and enjoy it. They may even share a platonic bond with these sex partners, but there's no romantic pull which is why a relationship would never work. I think of non-sexual romance to be like that on the opposite scale.

 

Oh right, thanks for pointing that out... I'll clarify, that relationship sounds like one between siblings or close friends, not a romantic one.

It sounds like you just suggested you can only have romantic relationships or family relationships, as if there is no such thing as platonic ones

---------- Post added 19th Oct 2014 at 10:24 PM ----------

Can you have passion with someone to whom you have zero sexual attraction?

 

I have a lot of people I am sexually attracted to but very, very few that I am romantically attracted to. I think it's important to know the difference