Another question. I know, I'm on a roll. I was thinking about this last night, when I was at an individual's house. He had a few people over, a few of them with their significant others, and I was observing my surroundings. I noticed some lap-sitting, some random caresses, and some quick little kisses, seemed to be the specialties for the night. Naturally, this stimulated, both, loneliness and a bit of anger. But once I let those two things subside, I got to thinking about different ways of showing someone, you care. So, how do you show someone you care? Do you provide them a listening ear? Do you give the best hugs in the world? Do you give them gifts? Do you pick them up, spin them around, and tell them how wonderful they are? Or is it something else?
Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiies! You've done a marvelous job, Hexagon, at least with me. You provide me good conversation, a listening ear, and a respectfully kind demeanor. I don't think you could be any further from 'bad'. I know that you definitely care. (*hug*)
Well on this board, it is usually by providing some support and advice to anyone needing it and even just by a simple thinking good thoughts and big hugs (virtually) or course lol. I am a fairly good listener and even if I can't give advice, I always just take it in and let that person know I have heard them.. That goes for online and offline as well with family and friends as well.. I try to be objective and side with one or the other if for example my parents are having an argument. My parents are pretty much the same, I just listen to them if they have had a bad day and kind of empathize with them I guess, my Dad and I have a really close bond.. I am close with both Mum and Dad, but my dad began this thing when I was little and in hospital of lightly tickling my back, shoulders and arms when I was recovering from surgery. More specifically as I was coming out of the anesthetic. I am 29 and my Dad and I still tickle each other's backs and shoulders as a way of showing we care. I also have Daddy/Daughter moments with him when we watch a movie or show together and I do the same with Mum as well. With my My niece, it is simply basically letting her boss me around and doing things she wants to do, cause well she is two and a half years old. With all of my family as well, I try to say I love you as much as I can and give hugs when they are needed as well.
I am unfortunately not that good at physical forms of affection except with very close family. However, I use what gifts I do have to make a person feel special. This can include just being consistent in my friendliness, reading their emotions to know when they're upset or happy, listening to their concerns (a lot of people seem to naturally confide in me) without gossiping, remembering shared events to repeat it years, decades later, sending them some cool news article or tidbit I think they'll be interested in.
I like your threads, Kaiser. If I actually seem concerned about you, I care. If I listen to your ranting, I care. I don't often do that with people I don't care about.
It is pretty simple with me, with how I show somebody I care. It, usually, happens one of three ways. The first is, if I give you any of my time. Being a mortal, who is subjected to the concept of time and death, I will wither away and die, one day. To give up something as precious as a single second, to anybody other than myself, is a very high honor. At least to me. I believe the same with others, too, when they give me, even a single fraction of their time. The second is, if I have the means, I'll do what I can to help another, reach some sort of goal. Even if it is something as simple as, them being hungry and wanting a meal, I'll provide the ride and finances, for them to eat. If it is something a little more, well, profound, then I'll do what I can, be it providing resources or just encouragement. When people feel they are loved, and know they are believed-in by others, you can really begin to see somebody's potential shimmering. I want others to achieve something, if I find them 'worthy'. The third is just ideal, as I have yet to really do this. But, ideally, if I did care about you, I'd want to just be there for you. Whether it be to dry some tears, give a hug, or tickle you until you stop self-deprecating yourself; just providing a presence is meaningful. Not only are you getting my time, and the means, but you are also getting my core, which can be potentially vulnerable. If I actually open up, remarkably so, well, you know that I care, or I am beginning to care.
First and most important thing is respect. Then kisses, hugs, holding hands, defending them, listening to them. Always being there for them, even if you have a whole lot stuff to do. Do not judge, just listen and help as much as I can. And srsly, you have to truly care, how you show it has a second place here.
You're right, I do care about you. Problem isn't that I don't provide good conversation, or don't listen. I just do that for anyone.