I'm devastated, heartbroken, and hurt. I had like this girl for 3 years, I never have the guts to tell her how I feel. I'm ugly. And fat. Maybe its just the way I see myself, my friend all say im not fat. But I know she will never want me, despite how much I need her. I think she just see's me as a good friend, that's all. My attraction towards her grew much more this year, because she became closer to me, we flirt ALOT. I thought she might like me too, but one day when she suspected I like her she avoided me and it hurts alot. But we are okay now, and I know there's another person she like in school. She graduated. They didn't hang out outside, other than after school, but when she came back to take her testimonial, they hang out afterwards. My crush's twitter, blog, and whenever she felt like writing her feelings down is always about her. Like how she wants to see her, how she miss her. Even there's no name implied, i just know its about her. It hurts. It really sucks to see the person you like, like someone else. I have no idea if she is straight or not, but the person she like is also a girl, but is "handsome". I can't stop thinking about her, I can't sleep I can't do much else because she's always always on my mind. But what makes it hurt so much more is that we always have a great time together, and whenever I'm away from her I want to be with her. (we are in the same class). I think I'm falling for someone that I can't have, and every time I see her I like her more and more. I have tried moving on from her but it is just impossible. Really. I see her almost everyday. I cant talk to her about this, it will get awkward. Advices?
I am really sorry to hear that.. ~hugs~ Honestly, and I don't want to sound mean or hypocritical or anything, but I honestly think if you say you have tried.. You haven't really tried hard enough. I think I have and several other people have given you some really sound and kind advice and I don't know what else to say really other then repeating myself over and over again to be totally honest here. You need to give it time and you need to distance yourself.. Yes you might see her in school, but you need to just limit your time around her and distract yourself with other things and focus on school. If you don't want to talk to her and tell her what is going on, them I don't really think there is anything you can do apart from let her go and move on. It is going to take time though and it is going to be hard and tough for a while, but you need to let yourself reach that first step and jump over the first hurdle. I know it's hard.. I have been there and although It was made easier for me by the fact we weren't in the same country, I still felt it hard to avoid her facebook and her tumblr accounts and Skype etc and force myself to not think of her.. But I slowly began to realize it was affecting my life.. It was affecting my concentration at work and it was really affecting my family as well, so I really think it is your best interest to do what you can to move on.
Really thank you for what you have said. I have asked this kind of question several times, i guess its really time for me to move on. Today in class we didn't talk, it really hurts but I guess I can get used to it.
You are welcome and I think you will eventually get used to it and be able to move on.. Like I said, focus on other areas of your life and what you can do to make your life feel more fulfilled.. You are only young so chances are.. You will find what you are looking for when you are ready to.. And it might be another girl or it could be a guy.. But just let your heart recover and let yourself just move. It really hurts me when my unrequited crush I met online doesn't speak to me, but I have learnt to just let it roll off me now and just concentrate on the people who do care for me. She might care for you as a friend, and that is wonderful, but as long as you are close to her, you aren't going to allow yourself to move on as you will be still hopeful of something happening. We are all here for you ~hugs~
Thank you so much. There's only two weeks left of school, until i get to see her next year when school starts. I think I should cut off all social media least I get reminded and get hurt all over again. But what if the next few days she get close to me again? What should I do?
Again, you are welcome.. Cutting off social media for now is good I think.. And I also think if she tries to be close again, just let her know you need some space at the moment and you just can't spend time with her right now.. Be strong with it and if she knows you like her, maybe explain that you need time to be able to move on and let go so it doesn't ruin your friendship.
This may be hard, but the best thing to do would be move on. Why waste your time on someone that's probably going to love you the same way back? Find someone that will! You shouldn't have to put in energy towards a lost cause, basically. I'd stray away from social media sites (or at least blogs and stuff that she writes) so that you don't get down in the dumps again. I too have been in this situation and I know that it must be hard for you. Go find someone that will make you as happy as you make them. That's the best advice I can give you
Thank you. Its kinda hard. Those that i know now does not make me feel the same way like she does. But i'll try
Just think about it this way.. You deserve to have someone feel that way towards you like the way you do towards that girl as well, you may no think it or believe it, but you do deserve it. It sounds like she might use your feelings towards her as an advantage cause she knows you will come running when she is lonely and is in need for a pick me up and no one else is around, but that is not good cause then she leaves you hanging again when she has others to spend time with. Be with someone who can love you and care for you as much as you do that person. Like I said.. You are 14, so you will find those feelings with someone else again, this isn't your only shot at love.
I get the idea of what you are saying, she will replace me with others, but right now there is no one else that got my attention, so maybe later on in life i might find someone else. But right now she is all I think about I tried to distance myself away from her today but its so hard though
I know it's hard, but it does get easier.. You just need to stick to your guns and just keep distancing yourself from here and concentrate on other things.. You are only 14 so does someone really need to get your attention right now? Do you really need to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend right now in this point in your life? Can you just be happy being friends with people for now? I know this age is hard as a lot of girls are experimenting with having boyfriends, but really.. I didn't have a boyfriend or anything in school and I got a long fine with just having platonic friends in my life. I think you need to really think about what you feel is missing in your life, which I think are some good solid friendships with girls or guys you can just hang with and spend time with. You have your whole life ahead of you to search for that perfect person.. If she was the one.. She would be feeling the same for to as well.
