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If you've ever been someone's "experiment", I would love your input!

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by PtsBrdsOnThngs, Nov 7, 2014.

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  1. PtsBrdsOnThngs

    PtsBrdsOnThngs
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    Location:
    Moorhead, MN
    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I recently went through a really rough situation with someone, where I was basically their guinea pig/experiment for them to try to figure out what they like (this "experiment" in particular spanned several weeks, so by no means just a quick hookup), and as I was venting my frustrations with the situation to a friend of mine, who also identifies as LGBTQ and has had similar experiences, they had a great idea of writing a collaborative article for our school paper on the issue.

    The article is aimed at shedding light on the emotional impacts felt by those on the other end of the experiment, specifically under romantic contexts (as opposed to sexual context, when the intentions are upfront and purely physical with little to no emotional attachment), or when a person is sought after solely for the novelty of having that experience (this being particularly prominent with young women).

    I am by no means saying that experimenting with your sexuality is bad, because it really isn't. My main goal here is to hear anyone's stories and thoughts on the topic, and to create some dialogue surrounding it to help me understand some alternative perspectives and experiences. My experience as a cis man can/will differ greatly from those of lesbian women, trans*, or non-binary individuals.
     
    #1 PtsBrdsOnThngs, Nov 7, 2014
  2. White Knight

    White Knight
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    Probably this is comes from not defining borders of relationship very well. To me if someone is experimenting they are mostly into sex. Experimenting with emotions sounds all wrong and cruel to other side.

    Most gay guys I know couldn't seperate emotional and physical relationship very well as we need that human touch. Being accepted as who you are can be addicting. Especially if you are in closet and can't access places like this forums, it is very easy to think world hate you, no one ever love you. For that acceptance, even it is fake, temporary or out right an illusion, the things we could do is terrifying.

    Been there done that. Tho our relationship were never an experiment. I loved him, he loved sex... story of my relationships... If you give in too much that thing changes you... barely for good.

    I think this is why angry, lonely and bitter gay elder concept is common in countries with little acceptance of gay indivudals. In some morbid sense, reaching that point is a privilage as most end their lives way before their twilight years.

    I don't know if this is the answer you are looking for or could be any help.
     
    #2 White Knight, Nov 7, 2014
  3. Yayo

    Yayo Guest

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    One time yes but not in a long time. Though every once in a blue moon I'll have a guy pop up who its obvious is just looking for something a little "kinky" and I always end it right there. A lot of guys learn from porn to see transsexuals as a " novelty item"...female with a little sumthin extra. And they see us as objects to be fucked used and forgotten and forget that we're real, living breathing people with thoughts, feelings and emotions.

    I'm lucky to have gotten very little if that and had mostly positive experiences with guys, who see me abd treat me just like any other girl...so I'm fortunate
     
    #3 Yayo, Nov 7, 2014
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