Why do people think Pansexuals hate Bisexuals?

I found myself in a very similar position to you.. I heard of the term pansexual when I first began questioning and thought perhaps it was me, but didn't know enough of it.. So Identified as bisexual for a long time, for almost two years and then being here made me realize that pansexual does fit me more perfectly then any other label. It feels right and I am comfortable with it as well, however as I identified as bisexual for two years.. I could never hate bisexuals.. I understand bisexuality and I don't see anyone as being bisexual any different to myself.. I don't know why there is so much hate within the LGBTQ community. I can't think of any reasons as to why we have to hate anyone unless they have done something to deserve to be hated and having a different label then our own is certainly not one of them.

 

I've never heard of pansexuals hating bisexuals actually. =)

I do think pansexual describes me better than bisexual, but I'm not comfortable with the label (yet). I feel that it creates an unnecessary struggle.

But you are right, bisexuality and pansexuality are closely related. =)

 

I usually say "I don't care about the gender". :icon_bigg I don't specify the label. If I do specify it, I say bisexual, but I explain I don't care about the gender. :lol:

 

Maybe because some bisexuals are transphobic?


I had a bisexual "friend", with whom I came out as a non-binary person, and one day I asked him:

- "Since you're bisexual, have you ever been in love or in a relationship with a trans person or with a non-binary person?"

- "Absolutely not! I have to stay with a true man or a true woman. I don't like artificial people."


Of course, he broke my heart. So, I don't hate bisexuals but I'm afraid that another bisexual can think this way and break my heart again.

Maybe this is the reason why pansexual don't like some bisexuals.

 

Do people think this? I don't think this. Granted, I don't actually know any pansexuals. But I wouldn't assume they hate bisexuals. Why would I? Why would anyone? That just doesn't make sense...

 

That's strange, I don't hate bisexuals

In fact, many people don't know what pansexual is so if I have to say it, I say I'm bisexual

 

I think asking "Why do people think Pansexuals hate Bisexuals" is like asking "Why do Catholics molest children?" Sure, both things happen, but this is not even close to a universal phenomenon. *People* don't think pansexuals hate bisexuals...*people* aren't even aware that either group exists! It's just some people (probably some vocal people) who draw attention...just like *certain* priests (or hopefully ex-priests) draw attention to other issues.

Look, there are assholes of every stripe. A bisexual is no more like to think that than a straight or gay person (and actually, I've heard the sentiment of [transitioned] transpeople as "not true" or "artificial" from the mouths of avowed pansexuals, too).

All bisexual *means* is that we sexually prefer the gender binary. Personally, on a gender scale of 0-10 (with 0 being fully stereotypically male, 10 being fully stereotypically female, and 5 being absolutely androgynous), my preferences tend to be for men in the 2-4 range and women in the 6-9 range, with preferences growing as the numbers increase. I don't rule out falling for a 5 any more than I rule out falling for a 0, 1, or 9, nor do I rule out falling for a 6+ male or a 4- female...but those aren't the people I'm drawn to. That quirk of me is what tells me I'm bisexual, rather than pansexual.

But I need to be clear: when I say man in the 2-4 range, that *includes* transmen; when I say women in the 6-9 range, that *includes* transwomen.

So yes, I am a creature of the gender binary. But that doesn't mean I'm transphobic...those are two different things. What I am, perhaps, is somewhat put off by incongruity.

My question is why you would have thought that a bisexual person *should* be attracted to non-binary people...it kind of goes against our definition. But just because we're less attracted doesn't mean we think of them any less as people, or we deny their struggles. Only the assholes do that.

 

Alright, so I'm not technically pansexual I'm panromantic but I certainly don't hate anyone, hate doesn't do any good and takes up to much energy. I personally don't care what people identify as, I love basically everyone regardless of such things.

 

On further reflection I need to modify this (and correct one typo).

I'm not more attracted simply as the numbers increase...it's more like my attraction increases the closer you get to 7.5 (from either direction).

Also, I meant to say "0, 1, or 10" above, rather than "0, 1, or 9".

Neither correction was critical for the purposes of my overall message...but I don't like saying things I don't mean.

 

I asked if he was in a relationship with a trans person or a non-binary person just for curiosity. I didn't say "since you're bisex you must to like trans folks".

I don't bother if a person asks me: "Since you're gynesexual, have you ever been in a relationship with a trans woman?".

There's a possibility that I like transwomen, since I'm gynesexual, but this doesn't mean that I MUST absolutely be attracted by them.

I don't know if what I'm saying is clear.

However, I know that LGTB people can be as stupid and homo/transphobic as straight people are. But I think it's more a serious thing if a LGTB person has prejudices, are you agree with me?

 

I have not met with a pansexual person who disliked all bisexual people, but I have met people who identified as bisexual because they choose to only acknowledge the gender binary. I can see this bothering people who acknowledge the spectrum. That is not my reasoning to identify as bisexual, but I do know people to whom that is their reasoning ( We choose to agree to disagree).

 

I feel hated by some pansexuals. They've defined my sexuality for me and said it was cissexist. That's an act of hatred.

 

Not all bisexuals are like that , I've known many that dated trans people .

So let me get this straight the only difference between a bisexual and a pansexual
is pansexuals date trans people and bisexuals don't ?

 

No, that's not true at all. I'm a bisexual, and I'll date trans people, on or off the binary...

 

I acutally found this offensive and I have seen many pansexuals saying how bisexuals were cissexist and even some saying bisexuals were below them and that they were better than bisexuals because they loved all genders
I use to believe that pansexual and bisexual were different but my feels have changed since I have met bisexuals that also date trans folks .

I think the whole bisexuals only date cis genders is such a silly statement .

---------- Post added 8th Nov 2014 at 10:35 AM ----------

Your right about that , this whole pansexuals vs bisexual thing as I see feels very biphobic to me with how bisexuals are transphobic .

 

I'm bisexual and I have a pansexual who likes me so not all pansexuals are like that of course then again maybe im pansexual because i had a virtual sex rp session with a horse person and i think trans bodys are as beautiful as there cis counter parts :icon_redf -jumps back into my furrever alone box-

 

I wasn't referring to how you phrased the question...just the basis/motivation of it. If someone is a bisexual, asking them if they've been with someone non-binary strikes me as similar to asking a straight person if they've been with someone of the same sex. Just for curiosity? Ok. But an odd question nonetheless.

However, his bigoted response was completely unwarranted, and I'm completely with you on the fact that such bigotry is more serious/less expected coming from within the LGBT community.

I'm sorry you had that experience.

---------- Post added 8th Nov 2014 at 01:39 PM ----------

Nope. There are straight, gay, lesbian, and bisexual people, who also date transpeople.

My first reply above might clarify the difference between bisexuals and pansexuals for you somewhat.

 

Some bisexuals say so but I don't really understand why.


Transmen are men and transwomen are women.

Bisexuals like both men and women.


So, why some of them don't want to date trans people? Or exclude that one day they will fall in love with a trans person?


You cannot control your feelings, so I find a little cissexist excluding with absolute certainty that they won't never fall in love with a trans person one day.

For example, I like cisgender women very much but I don't exclude that one day I can fall in love with a transwoman.

Don't get me wrong guys, I hope you have understood my line of argument.