The Awkward Questions

Haha. I'm not at the age where I have to answer all that seriously.

However, something really funny the other day happened. My cousin is a college student and writes for a newspaper. In one of her articles, she kinda bashed the family aspect of holidays. She talked about a gay cousin. However, her only other two cousins have boyfriends, so that kinda just leaves me.

I don't know what my family expects, but they're not about to bring it up. Hopefully!

I think I have a pretty accepting family, so it doesn't really matter if they find out. They just don't yet. I'm more than happy keeping it that way.

 

I've never really had this problem, thank goodness. I can only imagine how awkward that must be.
I'd just laugh and change the subject if I were in that position.

 

I don't really have this issue because my Mom is usually relieved that I don't date.

 

Yeah, my grandmother has definitely given me the "you'll meet a nice girl" comment before. "Oh, I don't know about that, grandma" is my usual response and she just kinda moves on to something else.

 

Thankfully I don't spend much time with family I'm not out to. They ask me basic questions and that's it.

 

"When are you getting a girlfriend?"
"You'll be the first to know!"

 

You know, I always find the 'When are you getting a girlfriend/boyfriend' question rude even if It's not heteronormative; it still assumes I want to be in a relationship when I might not even want to. It's nobody's business.

 

Ugh, I used to dread this part of the holidays so much. I have one aunt who I only see once or twice per year -- always on Christmas Eve -- who is just relentless asking if I have a girlfriend. It got to the point where I make sure I leave my phone in the car because if I touch it for a second I'll immediately get a "texting your girlfriend?"

This year I don't have to worry about that since her family moved to Atlanta this year. In a way I'm kind of disappointed though because is the first time that I've genuinely wanted to be out and at this point I don't even really care how it happens. If I get pushed over the edge, snap, and just let it slip out, fine. I don't know if having that provocation taken away is a good thing. =/

 

I'm going upstate tomorrow for Thanksgiving dinner/family reunion and I'm really not looking forward to it. Some of my family members are so homophobic/racist and it's going to be awful and filled with awkward situations, I just know it.

 

I used to be asked that every Sunday when I called home from school. Always just responded that I was more focused on my studies or that it wasn't currently a priority. Both true. Also argued that I might not want to settle down ever and just dote on my sister's kids (which she has said she does want some day).

 

Those kind of questions annoy me even when they are not heteronormative. It's just none of their damned business, and I usually say it in those terms (with just a little more tact) which never stops them from asking in the first place but it does succeed in ending that line of inquiry really quick.

 

It's none of their business. Tell them so.

 

Haha usually I just name one of my female friends
Oh man if I managed to get a boyfriend I'd just drag him over and rub it in their face though XD

 

Creepy homophobe uncle totally tried to set me up with a random girl he knows who is 19... wtf-- my uncle is like 60// and he was just going on that I'd find her attractive... <vomit>

How creepy does it get?

Happy Thanksgiving!

 

Heh, my family are awkward about discussing dating in general, don't even think about homosexuality. I can't imagine any of them asking me something like this

 

These types of questions take advance consideration of how you're going to respond. If outing yourself is not an option at this time, you just answer them vaguely or you could be more mysterious, if you like to keep people guessing and drop hints, and say, "What makes you think I want a GIRLfriend?"

---------- Post added 28th Nov 2014 at 10:35 AM ----------

This is like my grandmother before I was out. She never stopped asking about "the girls" or my "girlfriends" (as if I am supposed to have more than one) =/

 

I always smile and say: "I'm not interested in boys. Not prepared for that, you know?" Or something like that. And then I laugh and they start taking about how that's smart and how I'll be able to focus on school and what not without a man "weighing me down. "

---------- Post added 28th Nov 2014 at 12:26 PM ----------

Oh that's nasty. :O

 

We're having the entire family over (grandparents + both sisters & their families) this Christmas. I don't think the topic of my ongoing singleness will come up, but I will just brush it off if anyone does ask.

What will complicate things is that I plan to come out to my parents soon - maybe this weekend. So I'll have to tell everyone in my family before long.