So the gay bar in town opens up to all ages from 5 to 9pm and I was thinking of going to it. I just was wondering if you guys have any advice. You see I'm going for the prospect of meeting some people and maybe a guy. So any tips?
You won't meet "the one" in a gay bar, you could... but chances are pretty low. It's just not worth the risk. People go to gay bars (notice, i'm speaking from the viewpoint of someone from Europe) with the idea of hooking up for the night, casual stuff... Generally, the atmosphere in a bar (be it gay or not) does not allow for a strong bond to form. It's a terrible place to hold up a conversation with someone, to get to know a person, etc... Plus... all the risks and stuff.
If one is a confident, good-looking person, I think going alone would be ok, but otherwise I do agree with this advice, based upon my own personal experience. There are good and bad folks everywhere, even in gay clubs, and I got picked on a few times by groups of guys...it was very demoralizing and put me off. I did have a bit of fun as well, but the pain outweighed the fun, in the end, and in any case I hardly even got to speak with anyone, so how could I get to know someone? Of course if you are pretty or handsome you will probably do much better than I did. I just recalled that once or twice, there were some guys who showed interest in me, but they were kind of 'big, strong, masculine types' and I did not feel particularly drawn to any of them...well ok there was one who was nice, but still soo much taller than me, kind of scared me off a bit...also, I prefer to get to know someone a little, before being sort of embraced by them in a way that suggested they wanted to have sex, and without either of us knowing each other at all...
Going alone is fine, just make sure there are others around when you leave and that you park in a well-lit place. I wouldn't be concerned while in the bar.
If you go with the expectation you are going to meet someone to date you will almost surely be disappointed. On the other hand I have found gay bars--and I've been to a lot of them in a lot of different places--to be a wonderful place to make friends. In fact my sort of core group of friends when I came out were my bar friends. I actually have several friends that I am still close with over twenty years later that I literally met the first time I went to a gay bar. I would not say that experience is typical, but it is not at all outside the scope of possibility if you are genuine and up front with people. As far as "the risks", well, I've been to a lot of gay bars and I honestly can say I've never been to one where I felt more at risk than any woman in any straight bar. Oh and just to throw one more wrench in the works, I met my partner of seventeen years in a gay bar...
