Getting sick of being ask why am I single. - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

**EM68** · 16th Oct 2008, 04:18 PM

I started a new job about 2 weeks ago. With this job I am on the road with coworkers going out to clients. While in the car we have some small talk to kill the time. I am 40 and never been married. I keep on getting asked your 40 and never been married? or still single? I have said that I have not found the right person yet or I am right now just concentrating on my career. Frankly I am getting sick of these questions.

Since it is a new job I do not know them all that well so I do not want to come out to them yet. In addition, I am a 1099 (independent contractor) employee. So I do not want to risk not having my contract renewed after 90 days. Am I being too sensitive? What so you guys think? I know this is a bit of a rant.

16th Oct 2008, 04:28 PM

I've never really been asked, but I'd just be like why does it matter so much to you guys? There's no time limit to when you need to be with someone by.

epiphanies · 16th Oct 2008, 04:39 PM

I get asked all the time while I'm single too. Of course, there's a gap from 20 to 40, but still. I know it can be frustrating. I feel I get a lil sensitive about it sometimes, but try not to let it bother you so much. People are just making small talk. Small talk makes for small minds.

**Lexington** · 16th Oct 2008, 04:39 PM

You can always turn the tables. That'll get the heat off you. "Why so interested? Are you asking me out? Aren't you married?" That'll turn it into a big "ha ha" moment, and the topic should move along.

Lex

BlasttheCloset · 16th Oct 2008, 11:07 PM

EM68, you are being anything but too sensitive, you are being smart about needing a job in 90 days and knowing that discrimination exists. So just keep doing what you have been doing and you can let them know later if you want to, but just try not to let it get to you right now.

16th Oct 2008, 11:17 PM

I can related to that, of course its frustrating.
At work, every time a girl friend comes in to say hi, my co-workers are like "ooo, is that your girlfriend?" and I just roll my eyes and say no, but they keep nagging me on it, its VERY annoying. Sometimes i just wanna go "NO, I'M GAY, I LIKE MEN!!" but I want to keep my work and personal life separate.

ok455 · 17th Oct 2008, 04:41 AM

Oh that question is really annoying i get asked that all the time especially by my cousins i dont know why my sex/love life is so important to them i just lie and tell them im against sex and dating

16th Oct 2008, 04:18 PM	#1
EM68 Happily Married! :) EC Moderator Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out and about. Location: Stoughton, Massachusetts USA Age: 43 Posts: 4,288 Join Date: Jun 2008	Getting sick of being ask why am I single. I started a new job about 2 weeks ago. With this job I am on the road with coworkers going out to clients. While in the car we have some small talk to kill the time. I am 40 and never been married. I keep on getting asked your 40 and never been married? or still single? I have said that I have not found the right person yet or I am right now just concentrating on my career. Frankly I am getting sick of these questions. Since it is a new job I do not know them all that well so I do not want to come out to them yet. In addition, I am a 1099 (independent contractor) employee. So I do not want to risk not having my contract renewed after 90 days. Am I being too sensitive? What so you guys think? I know this is a bit of a rant.

16th Oct 2008, 04:28 PM	#2
Midnight Angel Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Getting sick of being ask why am I single. I've never really been asked, but I'd just be like why does it matter so much to you guys? There's no time limit to when you need to be with someone by.

16th Oct 2008, 04:39 PM	#3
epiphanies Well Known Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: More gay than bi Out Status: All important people. Do ask, Do tell. Location: VA Age: 24 Posts: 199 Join Date: Jul 2008	Re: Getting sick of being ask why am I single. I get asked all the time while I'm single too. Of course, there's a gap from 20 to 40, but still. I know it can be frustrating. I feel I get a lil sensitive about it sometimes, but try not to let it bother you so much. People are just making small talk. Small talk makes for small minds.

16th Oct 2008, 04:39 PM	#4
Lexington The gay gargoyle EC Advisor Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Colorado Age: 42 Posts: 12,371 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: Getting sick of being ask why am I single. You can always turn the tables. That'll get the heat off you. "Why so interested? Are you asking me out? Aren't you married?" That'll turn it into a big "ha ha" moment, and the topic should move along. Lex

16th Oct 2008, 11:07 PM	#5
BlasttheCloset Crazy!!! Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual - prefer women - Kinsey scale 4.5 Out Status: to everyone who asks, so not many people Location: Boulder, Colorado, USA Age: 20 Posts: 227 Join Date: Oct 2007	Re: Getting sick of being ask why am I single. EM68, you are being anything but too sensitive, you are being smart about needing a job in 90 days and knowing that discrimination exists. So just keep doing what you have been doing and you can let them know later if you want to, but just try not to let it get to you right now.

16th Oct 2008, 11:17 PM	#6
Myke Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Getting sick of being ask why am I single. I can related to that, of course its frustrating. At work, every time a girl friend comes in to say hi, my co-workers are like "ooo, is that your girlfriend?" and I just roll my eyes and say no, but they keep nagging me on it, its VERY annoying. Sometimes i just wanna go "NO, I'M GAY, I LIKE MEN!!" but I want to keep my work and personal life separate.

17th Oct 2008, 04:41 AM	#7
ok455 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: Can't tell L!O!L Age: 24 Posts: 437 Join Date: May 2005	Re: Getting sick of being ask why am I single. Oh that question is really annoying i get asked that all the time especially by my cousins i dont know why my sex/love life is so important to them i just lie and tell them im against sex and dating __________________ http://209.50.252.116/smile.gif

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