Jealousy Does it hurt or help couples?

Well, a small bit of jealousy is fine as long as it is nothing serious-- Too much jealous is not good, however.

 

I am not a relationship expert only can talk from my point of view... If there is need for jealousy that means I lost my trust in that person so that relationship is on its final stages.

I am very loyal or very blunt about my affection to my partner and I expect the same. I know some people like to test if their partner is jealous which I find stupid. In that case relationship ends as well. If they like to play their stupid games, they can find equally stupid partner to themselves.

 

I agree with White Knight.

Also, your poll makes no sense. It is a "this or that" question, but the options are "yes and no"....

 

It depends on both partners, also there is a difference between being emotionally or sexually jealous.
To me it doesn't help, and it's a major turn off, but to each their own, as long as you don't hurt anyone.

 

I picked depends a little jealousy I would say is fine and in ways helps people to talk to one another but the nasty controlling aspects would kill any relationships .

 

More often than not, it's disastrous to a relationship. Jealous people are very insecure and lack self esteem and when all of this comes to the surface in a relationship it does not bode well. Imagine how you would feel to be checked up on or given the third degree by the person who is supposed to love you. At its most extreme, jealousy becomes obsessive and controlling and there is nothing healthy about it at all.

Jealous people need to examine themselves and work on their issues, rather than bringing it all to a relationship.

 

The question in the poll is not well formulated because you are basically asking two very different questions at the same time (Does jealousy helps couples?/Does jealousy hurts couples?) and I don't know which one I'm answering with the options. Alternatively, the options could have been "It helps," "It hurst," "Depends."

Anyway, jealousy is toxic, period. I don't think it necessarily means that the relationship is over... Yet, but it is a sign that things are well on their way there.

 

This is not a black and white issue.

If someone is somewhat jealous over me It's an 'aw cute they care and I feel wanted' sort of thing.

If you're so possessive you can't trust me to talk to anyone, look at erotic things, etc, we have a problem.

 

Well, I've never heard of it helping couples. If anything, it's usually something that drives people apart. I used to find it adorable, but at the same time, because I was insecure, too, and received validation from it. Now I'd rather someone be secure enough to not be easily threatened by me speaking to someone else, or going out with friends.

Trust is the key word here.

 

Hurt. Hurt hurt hurt. Never seen or felt or experienced anything worse than posessive entitled jealousy in a relationship. Borderline abusive.

 

I believe a tiny amount is fine, but no more. Because jealousy does instill a sense of passion, but like with most anything in life, too much and it becomes problematic. Of course, not many can control the amount of jealousy they feel, or begin to feel, and so it becomes, well, problematic.

There's a difference in 'I'd like to be with you' and 'I MUST be with you' -- and that is the key.

That established, I'd like to say I'm not a jealous person. This is half true. I can be jealous, but it's human nature. However, unlike many, I don't sit around and do nothing about it. I'll really reflect and come to understand why I feel this way, and then start to do something about it. For example, if somebody is doing better at something, and I really want to be better, instead of focusing all that energy on disliking somebody, I'll take that energy and make it my motivation to improving myself.

How one handles their insecurities, including jealousy, tells me a lot about a person. Probably more than just being around them, listening and observing what they say and do.

 

I believe jealousy is bad and toxic, period.
No good will ever come of it.

 

This exactly...
Dude, get out of my mind already.

 

I would say it definitely depends. I think every human being should have some level of jealousy when it comes to their significant other. I believe it's natural and a sign of how much you care. However, excessive amounts of jealousy DO NOT mean you care more.

I feel like jealousy is good so long as you feel it, but don't act in unfair ways because of it. (Don't be controlling, don't accuse your partner, don't try to control who they can be with, etc.) It's an emotion that you can't help feeling if you care enough, I believe, but must be controlled with logic and reason.
Kind of like how sometimes we feel sad and cry even though nothing particularly bad happened, it just really hit us, or sometimes we are in a great mood even though nothing all that great happened.

Sometimes I may feel jealous that my boyfriend lives in a co-ed dorm far away from me, and will worry stupidly he will cheat. It's a feeling i can't help because I love him and don't want to lose him, but in reality, I know he wouldn't ever cheat and I feel no need to bring it up with him because I know it's not actually a problem. Similarly, since I like girls more than guys, I know he worries when I hang out with my female friends (a lot of whom are lesbians) but he'd never try to ask me not to hang out with him, because even though he gets jealous, he knows it's just an emotion, and not supported by logic. Personally, I like to know he gets jealous, because he cares enough for it to matter. Me and him both truly trust each other, we just can't help but illogically worry or feel this pang of jealousy in certain situations. But we both are happy and comfortable with each other, it in no way hurts our relationship.

It's fine so long as there is trust and people are aware of what is unreasonable/illogical jealousy.

 

Definitely hurts couples, for the most part.

 

I've always been single, but my gut tells me that jealousy in just the right dose can be beneficial to the well-being of a relationship.

 

A teensy bit of jealousy is ok. I'd be worried if there wasn't any jealousy in a relationship. Jealousy usually means that the person means a lot to you, and you don't want to share him/her with anyone else in a romantic/sexual sense.

However, too much jealousy is unhealthy, and definitely hurts the relationship. If you get jealous to the point of starting to distrust your partner, or to the point where you become obsessed and possessive then I say that's definitely NOT healthy or good.