Has coming out of the closet become romanticized?

In my opinion, it hasn't. I don't think most pepole (whether straight or part of the LGBT) community still recognize the difficulties and struggles that people are often faced with when coming out of the closet.
I'm sure there are people out there who have an idealized view of how life will be perfect and it will be liberating after someone comes out of the closet, but I doubt that the majority have "romanticized" the notion of coming out.

 

I'm not sure I understand this YouTuber's point. What does he/she consider is romanticized about coming out? We romanticize it the same way a slave would romanticize freedom. There's nothing wrong with either scenario seeing that we are speaking about something that shouldn't be a privilege but rather the norm. So, what's his/her point exactly? What is he/she trying to get at?

 

Ok, well yeah, I agree. I don't think it's really a point worth reiterating though. I mean, everyone that is and has been in the closet knows that the very reason why you are there in the first place is because of fear. Why would anyone stay there if they thought "Diana Ross is not going to play in the background, family isn't always going to be accepting immediately, and a sexy boyfriend isnt going to come by." ? She speaks the truth, I'm just saying that everyone still in the closet are there precisely because they understand (and fear) this.

The "romanticizing" she is talking about is wishful thinking at best on our part, and I don't think any substantial amount of people is deluded enough to realistically expect that to be their coming out experience. Not when society still tries it's darnest to show us otherwise (for anyone that it's in the loop).

tl;dr: I still think it's a little pointless to reiterate something we all know to be true (because we live it).

 

For me, it was like..

Me: Mum, I'm gay
Mum: I know, you don't delete your browser history.

And that's all she wrote.

 

I bet you still don't :roflmao:

 

You're right!

 

Not really romanticized but I feel it is a bit forced maybe?

I know and realize the sense of freedom it brings. How relieved and happy people after coming out. However I feel it is... hmmm... injustice done to us.

Straight men/women doesn't feel like need to come out so why should us? I don't have problems with myself so I should ask for your permision to be myself. I don't have to warn them because I might make them uncomfortable with my boyfriend whom I would totally be way too much comfortable...

At the end it is totally personal preference for me... if you want to come out, come out no matter what your reason is.

 

I'm not sure it's so much romanticism as it is simplifying life. I think the "it gets better" campaign might have had an effect. I feel a lot of gay people put too much value on coming out. Coming out is just another way of saying being honest with yourself and others, and leading openly the life you want to live. But this mentality applies to every aspect of your life: your friendships, your vocation, your family, your romantic relationships, your interests, your persona etc. In my experience people tend to lose track of these things when they are in the closet (or newly out) because being out has been built up to mean so much.

Let's be real here, if you're an unemployed drug addict who's been disowned by his family, coming out doesn't necessarily mean "it gets better."

 

Well, it certainly doesn't solve all your problems. Don't expect your parents to change their minds if they are negative before you do your "big come out". Don't expect people to call them and say, "Bigots, you need to change." Despite their inaction, some people may still think that in their minds. Conversely, don't expect a dozen people to call them to bitch about your sexuality either. You are not in a bad Lifetime movie.

 

Hmm...I think the idea is more romanticized to people just coming to the realization that they are queer/gay/etc..Personally, I never felt the need to "come out" because it's just not a big deal to me. Most of the people I know that are out do romanticize it to a large degree but ultimately it is their prerogative~

 

Lol. That's why I use Incognito mode in Chrome

 

Yeah, I would say so. When I came out to my friends I'm not sure what I expected, the reaction was extremely positive and supportive (I wrote them a message online) but the next time I saw them it was as though nothing had happened. I of course thanked them for their responses and acknowledged it, but that was it, we didn't really even discuss it. And really, it's what I wanted, to not be treated any differently than I had been before. For me in my head it was like parade floats and confetti, but for them it was really no big deal, and I think it's important to remind ourselves of that :lol: .Life just goes on.

 

Now I see many people acting like it's not a big deal and one man told me that my parents are ok with it because lesbian sex is hot.
I have met many that take it as a big deal which it still is because many of us still get disowned and thrown out

 

There is not a damned thing romantic about coming out. It's a long hard process, and, for those of us who've been married, it's even more difficult. What you hope to do is survive for a year or two. Even if you're young and have supportive parents, who is there that has gone through what you're going though. It's similar to being the deaf child of hearing parents. No, romantic is the last thing I'd call it.

 

That's odd, because when I came out, Dianna Ross played in the background, live, my family was immediately accepting, and a sexy boyfriend appeared in my bed that evening. The only bad part was that I find Dianna Ross annoying, and she refused to leave my room that entire night.

 

No

 

Maybe more so to other people, if that makes sense? For example, I came out to my mom two nights via text message. I didn't plan to do it then at all, just she was getting pissed off that I didn't want a relationship with this guy she thought was perfect for me, so I just came out and told her it's not him, Im just not into any guys. This morning I found out she was mad because I told her via text message (not that I told her I'm gay, but how I told her), and that its "not a good coming out story to tell". So I guess maybe to other people in a way, who expect to be told our coming out stories in these elaborate ways, not realizing that it's hard for us to even come out and say it.

 

I don't think it's romanticized. For me, it was 100% a success, but for many others it isn't. When I told my mom and dad they were like "we kind of already knew but we're glad you told us".