Epic Failure

So I haven't been around much, not that anyone would realise seeing as how I'm not that well know. But I thought I'd post this because it's amusing to me.

To date I've never had a *bad experience* with anyone due to my sexuality, but today I got a text:

Anonymous Weirdo-
haha ur a fagget

Me-
No, it's spelled faggot. And even then you're wrong, because I'm neither a meatball nor am I a bundle of sticks.
(Yes I know, *how original of me* but the same could be said to Mr. Anonymous Weirdo)

Anonymous Weirdo-
so fuckin wat. haha lol ur a social retard.

Me-
Yeppers, hopefully you get that that's a joke. As in "lulz I r awkward round ppl"
maybe you can understand it in that context. It's nice to know you can at least read.

Me-
Hmm....Now I'm intrigued, where exactly did you read me calling myself a "social retard"? Because I think that was on my myspace at some point but I don't think it is nowadays.

So apparently I have a time traveling aquaitence/firend of a friend(?) who cared enough to take the time to message me.
I can't be sure, but the number seems familiar.

Mr Anonymous Weirdo must have gone back to trolling the interwebz because he/she/it never replied.

It obviously had to be either someone I know or a friend of a friend, because how else did they see my myspace(?) and get my number?

Btw Epic Failure is the name of my guild in WoW, just thought I'd put that out there.

So how has everyone been? <3

[Tim]

Haha, epic failure... I think there's a guild by that on the server I play on <_<;

I see you popping in every now and then, never actually talked to you though =P

Sorry you had to go through that... if you really wanna find out who it is, maybe ask your friends if they know who's number it is?

[davo-man]

Haha, good on you mate He sounded like an utter tosser...what a mofo, but you did good

[tashyyy]

i hate people like that
hes obviously looking for trouble, or wants to make you worried
dont let him get to you
how are you doing?
<3

[ArcaneVerse]

what an ass, why do people insist on going out of there way to inform people of there own sexuality (& misspell it) its quite pointless. I'm glad you didn't let Mr.anon get to you.

anyways if some one wants to insult me that's fine they don't have to like me but at least say it to my face I hate it when people hide behind a phone or computer.

[Bunny]

It's depressing that morons like that will never realize how stupid they really are.

Ok so Mr Anonymous Weirdo never replied back, apparently I fried their brain with my sheer awesomeness.
Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut now I have a new friend!

New Friend -
Hi dog.

Me -
Wow another new friend, I'm popular these last few days. I can't believe I've been so lucky as to have so many people taking the time of day to message me. I <3 you from the bottom of my heart.

New Friend -
"I'm happy for you fuckface : p" yes?

Me -
I'm sorry but did I miss part of this conversation? The quotation marks throw me off, also why is that a question?

New Friend -
I'm happy for you fuckface : p

New Friend -
Wooga booga booga you hairy twat.

Me -
Well aren't you just one hell of an intelligent being? And thanks for noticing I have body hair, it's a bit odd that you can see beneath my clothing though. <3

New Friend -
Yeh bro, I fully have x ray vision.

Me -
Nice, so did you get a good look at my wang then?

New Friend -
Don't you mean your vagina? VAGINA BOY.!!

Me -
You just get more intelligent by the minute, don't you? How am I a boy if I have a vagina, oxymoron much?

New Friend -
VAGINA BOY much.

Me -
Yep clearly I both have a vagina and am interested in them. That's convenient I guess I'll never have to worry about dating!

New Friend -
Cause I'm sure you have trouble with dating anyway.

Me -
Wow your sarcasm just boarded the fail train, you just complemented me foolio. Well I think we should hook up, there's definitely some chemistry between us.

New Friend -
Ew..uhm, give me the urge to vomit much.

Me -
See what I mean? Our bond is so strong that you get sick when I'm not around to comfort and caress you! But don't fret for upon our next meet I shall serenade you with the language of love, known only by me!

And that's it so far.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuut, if anyone read the last text fiasco thread I posted you know a tiny bit about my (ex) friend Joel, he has text me a few time since with such things as "bitch" and "dickhead" then even asked if I wanted to go out drinking with him on the weekend.

I'm not interested ineven talking to him anymore but I did reply to this message he sent me today.

Joel -
you look like a derro today, I felt like projectile vomiting when I saw your face.

Me -
Thanks, that's the exact look I was going for! =D It's nice to see that I have such a strong effect on you. But I think you should maybe go see someone about this weird infatuation you seem to have with me. It's nice to know you care so much, but it's actually getting kinda creepy. Also I'd like to thank you for dumbing down my vocabulary with yet another bogan word. <3

My messages are as great as I'd usually make them, but I got less than two hours sleep last night and then played frisbee for hours today. I got the message in the afternoon while on the bus home.

I know that the two other people texting me are Joel's friends and that they got my number from him, but I don't know who they are. lol
Joel's the same person who wanted me to cheat on my boyfriend with him, he's actually a pretty bad person now that I've taken a step back and truly look at him.

I'm a little confused as to why Joel's friend keep texting me, especially when Joel himself knows that I find stupidity like this highly entertaining.


Soooooooo sleeeepy, lol. I wish they had text tomorrow. I was falling asleep half the time hahaha.

Myzou
I just checked and apparently there are a number of guilds going by that name. =(
Oh well I'm leaving the guild anywho, the GM is a douche. And the very few people who I liked in the guild have left already.

tashyyy
Apart from the chronic fatigue I'm great! And yourself?
Things and people like this don't make me the slighted bit worried. I lol'ed when Joel threatened me over the internet one time. It made my day.
Hahaha as stated above things like this hardly get to me, they make me happy!
I only post them here for those who share the same sense of humour as my own.
<3

I don't mind not knowing who they are, if they're too scared to say something like that to ME of all people then clearly they're as pitiful as I imagine them to be.

Sleepy, oh so sleepy.But it's only 5:41pm so I mustn't sleep now or I'll become nocturnal again.
<3

[davo-man]

Haha you and your texts make me laugh...The second one is just as douche as the first, if not more...Good job on making them look like fools

[thephailboat]

Wow.
Your responses are very mature as they barely or not at all contain vulgar language.
I agree with tashyyy, don't let it get to you.
Props to you.
:]

[Tim]

Wow, maybe you should consider changing the number? o.O

If they have your number, then they have to be a friend or a friend of a friend... as I hate to say that <_<

And apparently the epic failure on alleria was disbanded :S lol

[George]

*applauds you*

Myzou
I now know that these people are indeed friends of Joel, I walked past him on the street today and one of the people he was with was like "is that him".
Reeeeeeeeeal discreet, my friends and I just lol'ed.

I'm not going to change my number, first of all idiotic messages like those are entertaining and also why should I change my number because just because I'm not liked by someone? :P

Also, I play on Gorgonnash (a.k.a. Gonnacrash)

George
*bows*

[George]

*yells out from crowd* ENCORE!

George
Hahaha, well apparently you may get your wish.
They've now taken to calling me, I just got a call from yet another person. It consisted of "I'll burn your house down (ugly cackling/screeching laughs) I'll burn/rape your house down" It's hard to tell if they're sating rape of burn the second time. =S

Apparently they don't realise that you can record calls, I've already recorded a few similar calls.
I'm thinking maybe I'll threaten calling the police and see how they react to that lol, not that I will be it's bound to cause a humorous reaction on their part.

[davo-man]

Eurgh, I know it must not be fun...but "rape your house"...Well, too bad if they get splinters I'm all for you recording and going to police I think that's a good idea...Or even just threatening to

davo-man
Well if they make similar threats against my house and/or family again I will definitely consider it.
It's fine for them to try and harass me but I do not appreciate them making threats against my family.
And the thing is I can't be entirely sure whether they were joking or not, they aren't the most mentally sound of people and the fact that they're borderline alcoholics doesn't help matters.

[George]

If it's being going on for this long I doubt it's a joke. ENCORE! ENCORE! Raep their minds!