How Did Ypu Accept Your Bisexuality?

Realized at 29. I accepted it at 30, but now I am still struggling with it again. Going back and forth with it. I love it and hate it. Mostly because it's threatening everything I know and love atm.

 

I realized last summer. I was confused since at the time I had a crush on a girl from my class. Acceptance came naturally I guess. I don't question it anymore. It's part of me now.

 

"I like girls. And guys."

*Pause*

"This is pretty fuckin' awesome."

*Accepted*​

Not exactly what happened, but it may as well have been. It was fairly easy to accept. Of course, that's just with me, individually. There's still society, but when it came to me, eh, it wasn't a big deal. Honestly, I really like it, because it potentially increases my dating/romantic pool. I don't see any real drawbacks to it, except maybe society's perspective on it; it doesn't exist, and so on.

But fuck them. They're just mad I have more options! LOL.

 

Pretty much this xD (!)

 

I never had to

 

It was very easy for me, too. That feeling of something just being true. I wouldn't even say I went through a questioning phase. It was just... there.
And I think it's pretty awesome, really, so accepting it was rather easy.

 

Realized it when I was 12/13
Found out the name when I was 20.
Never needed to 'accept' it, I just was, similar to my atheism.

 

Well I realized I wasn't straight several years ago when I was 15 or 16. I thought I was a lesbian at first (for like a year?) but then realized even though I prefer girls by a long shot I'm still into guys, too.
I have no problem with being bi, I just wasn't sure what I was and that's what bothered me.

Of course that's just the internal stuff. Not always being fully accepted by straight or gay people is a whole 'nother can of worms.

 

Personally, I think it might have been easier to be either completely gay or completely straight... Being somewhere in the middle confused the hell out of me... It's the constant second guessing... Do I like guys or do I like girls? Am I really gay but in denial? If I am bi, can I choose whom I fall in love with? Do I need to have relationships with both to be happy? Can I be monogamous?

It doesn't help that a lot of people see being bi as being indecisive, or someone that's in denial about their true sexual orientation. Or my worst pet hate being seen as someone that cannot be monogamous or trusted in a relationship. All those preconceptions are all false, but still we get judged quite easily by both the straight and gay communities... Guess we are a minority in a minority group...

In the end, for me, it came down to acknowledging that I wasn't straight and then trying to embrace being gay. After a while I realised that my attraction to some women didn't go away and that it wasn't a case of being confused, I was really attracted to both guys and girls. I then decided to not try and conform to a label and become something that I'm not.

I have my values and try to live my life accordingly. For me that means a monogamous relationship with someone whom I fall in love with... That person can be a man or a woman, doesn't matter as long as he or she is my soulmate.

 

I just "found out" last summer. I'd known subconsciously for some time tho, one of my first crushes was actually a boy (I've always known this, yet never questioned it ). For me, joining here and seeing the word written "Bisexual" was vital. It took the questions out of my head a bit and let me distance myself from it, stop fighting it and just let it be. Maybe that sounds weird, but it's really true. I still feel conflicted about it, but I'm beginning to actually look upon it as a positive thing, like Kaiser said, we don't have to limit ourselves in who we are attracted to ^^

 

"Man, guys are really hot."

ten minutes later

"Man, girls are really hot."

"Oh, wait... ah f*ck it I guess everyone's hot."




Really though I always accepted it. Always realized it. Just did my best to pretend to be completely asexual during the ten years I was in a hellish social conservative village of 4000 people.

 

I thought I was gay, then realised I like only guys who look like women, then realised I like (at least sexually) women too.

 

It just takes a lot of time to get over the shame sometimes.

I learned I was bisexual when I was 14. I didn't come out until 16, and I didn't really start to love being bisexual (now I really, really love it) until 22.

 

It was hard at first but then I realized that how I felt was more important than a label.

 

Umm, was completely unaware of it for a few months, while reading up on bisexuality/fanfiction including bisexuality, and then it just clicked one day, that yeah, everyone is f*cking hot. Well, not everyone, but you get what I mean.

 

"Why does everyone think I'm gay? It couldn't possibly be because I have in depth conversations about how cute girls in movies are, right? I mean, I comment on cute guys too... Wait a second... Do I think both guys and girls are cute? Yeah... Do I feel attraction to them both? Yeah... Oh."
And that is the short version of my thought process on the matter

 

There was a lot of self-loathing through my teens and twenties. Back in the 90's, it seemed like it was a thing a lot of stars did to get attention. I only knew one person who was bi in my high school, and she certainly didn't broadcast it(it was a Christian school) and left after a year. I knew by the time I was in college that it was not just a passing phase. It never worked out for me to pursue a guy at work because I am NOT that guy to do work relationships. In 2013, when I was released from my job, it gave me a lot of time to reflect. The bitter cold winter last year gave me more time, and I was deeply depressed. I realized that part of my depression was from keeping my sexuality so private as I am not a private person and quite open mostly(esp. with the right group of people).

I still struggle with it even after coming out. It's mainly from church people judging me still and saying I am not a Christian. I feel torn between the two communities, but reading about the Gay Christian Network out there yesterday encouraged me a lot.

 

So I realized I'm emotionally and sexually attracted to women and then sexually attracted o men, but not emotionally attracted. So I have NO IDEA what that means lol.