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"In a gay relationship who's the man and who's the woman?"

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by edy, Jan 23, 2015.

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  1. edy

    edy
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    I know some of you are bothered by this question but I'm not :roflmao: I really like being treated like a girl in a gay relationship :lol::lol:

    I know Ellen Degeneres famously said something about it but see, some of us don't dislike these questions at all
     
    #1 edy, Jan 23, 2015
  2. Quem

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    Well, if one asked me that question, I would find it odd. Neither Kabuki nor me is a woman, so "who's the woman" makes no sense, literally. In other ways, I guess it basically means either something sexual (in that case we're both a man and a woman) or it means something based on stereotypes of a specific culture. I prefer a direct question, not such an indirect question with multiple meanings.
     
    #2 Quem, Jan 23, 2015
  3. Fallingdown7

    Fallingdown7 Guest

    I just find the question confusing as heck because there are two people of the same sex in a relationship...sooo....

    And even straight couples have different gender roles; there are plenty of dominant women dating submissive men.
     
    #3 Fallingdown7, Jan 23, 2015
  4. Tohru-Chan

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    I'm just going to leave this here..

    [YOUTUBE]c-2KKHOXnY4[/YOUTUBE]
     
    #4 Tohru-Chan, Jan 23, 2015
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2015
  5. HM03

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    If I ever get asked that in the future, I'm responding with: "which chopstick is the fork?" :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #5 HM03, Jan 23, 2015
  6. NingyoBroken

    NingyoBroken Guest

    I'm the "man in the relationship" because I'm dominant.

    But there are females who 'wear the pants" in the relationship too, and guys who are submissive
     
    #6 NingyoBroken, Jan 23, 2015
  7. xylaz

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    If you mean who's the bottom(woman) or who's the man(top), you're inviting stereotypes. Many masculine men prefer to bottom because the anus might be their most erogenous zone(most sensitive area). They might even like the pain and I've heard guys say bottoms are the "true men" in that case because not everyone can deal with it.
    Personality-wise, that's more complicated because personality is one thing that should never be defined, but if you're into being such, then that's cool too.
    I am masculine and versatile, so I am both? No problems with that:icon_bigg....I like being feminine once in a while because girls have such attractive personalities.
     
    #7 xylaz, Jan 23, 2015
  8. Fallingdown7

    Fallingdown7 Guest

    ^ This

    I even know some straight couples who equally penetrate one another (With the man's penis and the woman's strap-on) so there are vers heterosexual couples as well. And these men are still straight and masculine.
     
    #8 Fallingdown7, Jan 23, 2015
  9. ANewDawn

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    Lol that's what Ellen said.
    It doesn't bother me yet because no ones ever said it to me but I get why it's offensive. Ppl think that being a gem gay man makes you a girl and being a butch lesbian makes you a boy. I'd probably just say really slowly "there is no man and woman in my relationship. That's what gay means" and make them feel stupid."
     
    #9 ANewDawn, Jan 23, 2015
  10. davidguitar20

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    id like to be in a manly gay relationship where we both act like men
     
    #10 davidguitar20, Jan 23, 2015
  11. AlamoCity

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    My boyfriend would wear the pants in the relationship; that's because I almost always wear shorts :lol:
     
    #11 AlamoCity, Jan 23, 2015
  12. Jonathan

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    [​IMG]
     
    #12 Jonathan, Jan 23, 2015
  13. resu

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    It basically assumes masculinity and femininity are mutually exclusive and that there must be a man to a woman, which is a false dichotomy. Now, I do understand yin-yang and that sometimes opposites attract, but there is plenty of research suggesting those who are more similar in personality are more likely to have less stressful and confrontational relationships.
     
    #13 resu, Jan 23, 2015
  14. Tightrope

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    Clever.

    If anyone treated me like the subservient party, I would be heading toward the door.

    ---------- Post added 23rd Jan 2015 at 05:51 PM ----------
    I agree with you on this one.

    It doesn't matter on the genders, either. Many people have made relationships with a power balance work.
     
    #14 Tightrope, Jan 23, 2015
  15. catsarecute

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    I'm Normally The Man So Mabye It'd Be Nice To Be The Girl? Idk Btw The Queston Doesn't Really Bother Me Either :slight_smile:
     
    #15 catsarecute, Jan 23, 2015
  16. TheStormInside

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    Whenever I hear that sort of question, or "Which one is the man?" All I can think is "Neither, isn't that kind of the point?"
     
    #16 TheStormInside, Jan 23, 2015
  17. Pret Allez

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    The one who takes it in the ass most regularly is the girl in the relationship. The one who licks the most vulva is the man.


    Snarkily, Adrienne
     
    #17 Pret Allez, Jan 23, 2015
  18. Gen

    Gen
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    You don't want to be the woman. You want to be submissive. You want to feel protected and watched over. You want to be the only feminine one. You want a knight and shinning armor. I truly hope that you are able to find a partner fitting that description. Best of luck!

    But this has got to stop. I don't know how many times people on this site have taken the time to explain away this simpleminded view of women and femininity that you continue to reinforce time and time again. It is sexist. It is harmful. It needs to end. There are many places to blindly accept ignorance and remain set in one's insulting and detrimental ways on the internet. This is not one of them.
     
    #18 Gen, Jan 23, 2015
  19. ForNarnia

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    Among my friendship group, we don't say 'Who's the man and who's the woman?'
    We say 'Who's the Dom and who's the Sub?'
    Or 'Which of you is the Seme and which is the Uke?'
    But that's just my weirdo friends haha :wink:

    I was talking to my lesbian friend about it, and someone asked her who 'wore the trousers' out of her and her girlfriend, and we both just went "Both, obviously! No-one's walking around naked, here!"
    They're all just stupid questions in the end.
     
    #19 ForNarnia, Jan 23, 2015
  20. CandyKing

    CandyKing
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    I am neither I am a magical magician that can do several magic treats with my tongue and my lips I would show you guys put it is not rated PG-13.
     
    #20 CandyKing, Jan 23, 2015
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