I'm visiting India for my cousin's wedding. Almost my entire extended family lives here. Both my parents are the only ones out of their respective families that moved to America. The cousin that is getting married is 3 years younger than me (she's 21, yea they get married really early here for some ridiculous reason). Now everyone's talking about what's going to happen when I get married (there is no if for them, it's when) and talking about finding me a guy in America. It's all a little overwhelming. Every time the subject comes up, which is a lot b/c I have 34 immediate cousins in total, (not counting all my dad's cousin's kids who live in the same complex as his brothers) I get really worried about what's going to happen in the future, and if this army of relatives will be accepting of me if I came out. I guess there's not real question her, just needed to get this out. Thanks for reading.
I'm in a situation very similar to you, in a way. My family is having weddings left and right. And I'm almost first in line to find a girl. I'm from gypsy (Roma) heritage. And we get married extra extra early (as young as 15-16). I'm lucky my family waits a little longer.
My parents are from India, but I have a lot of relatives in the US (actually in the same city) Don't listen to your Indian relatives. They are stuck in the old mindset that the only respectable decision is to get a job, an arranged marriage, have kids, etc. That's how they define success. In my case, I just say point blank, I want to make my own decisions and I don't want anyone to be "looking out" for people. Actually, it really annoyed me, and I knew afterward I will try my hardest to get out of the bubble and become independent.
I can totally relate. I'm the third of 4 sisters who are all close in age. In my religious circle the kids get married in order so I'm expected to be next. It's gonna be a problem when my younger sister is ready to get married and people are still waiting for me.
Totally kind of get how you must be feeling. My family's indian too. But I guess the pressure on a girl for marriage is much greater at the age you are at. Best thing to do is...smile at them and change the convo. Don't let it rain on your parade or ruin your enjoyment of the wedding you're at 34 immediate cousins is a lot!! Do you think any of them would be accepting?
Yeah, I hate that my mom, who I already came out to, was thinking this will affect my cousins on her side of the family because I'm the oldest. She keeps saying the next oldest, a girl who only graduated dental school in the past year, needs to get married soon so she can have babies. :rolle:
Sorry, that was a typo, I have 24 cousins, which is still a lot. I actually almost told one of them, but I got too scared. She's coming to here in March, so maybe I'll have the courage to tell her then. @Resu: She's a dentist too, and she's coming here to take some exam to be able to practice here or something.
