Closeted folks, how much do you fear being outed accidentally or intentionally?

I said "A little," but really I would just be nervous; I would love if someone outed me to my school, it would be so much easier to come out. I'm in a position where I want them to know but I am not coming out to them yet because I have to make sure these trans feelings are genuine and not some kind of phase. All in all, I would like it if I was outed to the school.

 

I'm hoping I get "outed" because the fact that I love men shouldn't be a special occasion or a circus show rude spectators gawk at. I don't believe in coming out because homosexuality/bisexuality is something I want to treat as normal. This is how I dealt with my orientation; it's normal. My opinions are otherwise unpopular(mainly the coming out aspect of it) because if I want to date a guy, I believe I should have the right to just do it.

I flirt with both guys and girls unabashedly. I've joked that I go "both ways", said I could be Bi, and said I love jocky-masculine, sweaty jerks on occasions lol. No one has seriously asked me interestingly enough. I think it's because I appear so comfortable with my sexuality, that I look like a "straight" dude who is super open-minded. Maybe people don't take me seriously because I treat it as such.
Don't know, but that's why I state in my "About Me" that some people may know. I just asked my longtime girl-friend out. So that may be harder now more than ever.

 

I worry about accidentally outing myself. I'm always super worried about a faux pas when I'm talking to someone who doesn't know

 

A lot, though it kinda fluctuates.

In general, I'm pretty paranoid about anyone finding out or catching me 'looking', but I feel a bit more relaxed when I'm out and about and around people I don't know.

As for family, frickin' terrified.

 

I'm not scared of people knowing, really. I only truly worry about my parents finding out, because I have to face them everyday.
I am a free spirit and I really don't care what people think of me, or at least don't let their opinions stop me from being me.
The only reason I haven't opened 100% is because I've never been in a relationship with someone before, so I don't wholeheartedly know enough about myself to settle and come out...

 

I'm scared that the people I've told will tell people.

 

That is so true. It seems rude to me, because they're taking away your chance to tell them yourself, and not being able to do that yourself damages trust. It's very sad and unfortunate that things turn out that way sometimes...
I really hope the same doesn't happen to you!

 

Being outed means being disowned for me. It's something I fear very much.

 

It depends...A lot to my dad, and a little to my (male)co-workers...I actually fear being outed to Straight guys because they're all homophobes...With females, either they automatically know I'm Gay, or, on rare ocassions, I tell them...

 

If someone were to out me to my family, I'd actually like that, because that would take the pressure of coming out off me.

I'm very scared about being outed to my co-workers though, because I'm sure that would get me fired.

 

Seeing as my mom already knows (huge denial) I don't worry too much about it getting back to her. The few I've told have promised to keep quiet. I guess if she did find out that I told more people it would result in a huge fight which would result in two days of silent treatment on her part. Then she would just go back to denial again. It's a cycle I've been through many times. I think because I haven't been proactive in meeting gay people and having a girlfriend, it's easier for her to think that I'm not really gay.

However if any of my co-workers found out I would have cause to worry. No one is really out at work, to my knowledge at least. I'm very well-liked there and if people were intolerant and mean about it, I would feel embarrassed and saddened.

 

If it got back to my dad I'd be a mess. Unless by some miracle he doesn't react badly and then I'd be super grateful to whoever outed me.

Due to the current attitude here in Japan, it's 40/60 chance I'd lose my job (and with it my home and visa) if I got outed at work. And that would suck.

 

None at all.

I think at this age I can deal whatever those "normal" people can throw at me.

However on case of intentionally outing... well I will hurt that people... very much. I can't think any sane person who knows me, my stand in life would blurt out my orientation with a good intention at heart.

 

It's like 50/50. I'm out to a lot of people. But when it comes to family and friend's who know my family, the possibility of them finding out and/or telling my family bothers me. It stresses me out. I like to think that it wouldn't bother me much but it would, especially since I'm not completely independent. I don't know what would happen if they were to find out.

 

Zero fear.

When I was about 14, I had one girl tell people, but I'm sure they've forgotten because we haven't spoke in years. Same situation with a few others I have told, whom I don't talk to anymore either. If they've remembered, they haven't done anything. Same with others who might know that I'm unaware of, so I'm not worried.

Unless caught out physically, in which I'd be very careful of in the first place, I can generally lie or laugh it off to get out of it and not speak of it again. I've hid it long enough to be confident in not accidentally blurting it out.

 

This was my number one fear for awhile, but I'm starting to care less. I don't want it to get back to my parents because I would like it to come from me, not hearsay. And I'm still terrified of actually coming out to them. But I worry less about being accidentally outed to other people. I have this attitude lately that, I'm going to tell people eventually, so if they find out, they find out (with the exception of my parents, anyway).

 

I'm in the same boat, except that I'm in South Korea.

 

I put "a lot" but I've only recently been accidentally outted for the first time. The funny thing is it was my fault that it happened and there was sort of of an elation as I'd been trying to tell the people I was outted to for a long while... And weirdly I sorta wanted it to spread more.... I wanted to be outted to more people cause it was so freeing! Buuuuuut I'm still terrified... I can't help it, I was picked on a LOT as a kid and it gave me a bit of a complex...

I'm always scared I'm going to get made fun of... Or worse, doubted, and told I'm wrong... Funny enough my most common reaction I get is a quick acceptance along with a few questions, and me getting excited and wanting to spill and explain everything! I try to remember that nobody really wants my life story but god it's hard waiting for them to ask the right questions sometimes! :lol: I haven't gotten any backlash from coming out yet which is good but I keep worrying something bad will happen eventually...

 

the last thing i want is all the year 7-9s asking really personal questions.