Hello guys Just wanted to discuss about something. I used to know of a guy who used to mention that he will wait until he is in a relationship to experience sex. (He was a virgin.) I remember he used to be very hardcore about it that he is like an "advocate" about having sex within a relationship. But recently, I saw in his blog that he has started to hook up with guys (one night stands ). I was quite surprised. Its not that I am saying he is wrong. But I am shocked that his views has changed drastically in a short span of time. (from relationship sex to hook-up sex) Is it possible for a person's views to change? (I mean the views used to be strong ones)
Yes. That occurs with people who think (without considering interferences on weak minded people), and are always testing their point of view. That's a good thing.
The more you live and the more you learn, you change. When you change your views also change... or when your views change you change for better or worse.
Its sometimes when people are going to extremes they repress something. In this case he might have repressed his wishes, then going to the other extreme. A more moderate approach would be helpful imo.
My views have changed dramatically over the past 2 years it comes down to experience and outside influence
Yes, our views and opinions can change a lot and we should be more open to the idea that it can/will happen. If you are open to new ideas and ways of thinking and doing things it can make life more interesting and exciting.
Well, when it comes to sex (or any other powerful impulse, such as fear) resolutions don't often put up an insurmountable barrier... The rabbis in the Talmud would say that "no one can guarantee the sexual behaviour of another" (for example, in a court of law or a legal document)...they had an unusually keen and honest understanding of human nature...
Thanks for your replies guys I thought this quote might be appropriate here "The only thing that does not change, is change itself" - Leo Veness
It depends. Some people never change, some people take time to change, and some people change like traffic lights. I am a person that takes forever to change - I'm just now opening up to medical marijuana, and I've had close friends who have smoked for years (I just had a conversation with one of those friends about this last night, so that's why I thought it was a great topic to mention!) With the guy the OP mentioned, maybe he just realized he needed to explore and live life. I probably sound just like him at times, when what I'm really thinking is "actually, that'd be fun!" Sometimes it's just a lifelong belief, or it could be something that you feel is wrong but really want to do. Or he could have just been a liar - I've had that before, too. Lol
Depends on the person. But yes. Let them face death at least a few times. That fear where there life flashes before their eyes may change their views about doing stupid dangerous crap.
Yeah, people can change their views quickly, especially if they weren't as committed to them as they seemed. Also, people give into temptation easily sometimes. It's like people I've met who say they're straight-edge, they end up not being so straight-edge after a few years...your mindset changes and you almost can't even imagine the way you used to think, because it seems so foreign and long ago.
Yes. If there is a reason to change. Sometimes it comes from experiencing life, and seeing what works and what does not. And other times, it may come in the form of shame or humility, depending on how kind life wishes to be. Many individuals will continue to do the same thing they always have, if nothing significant, or at all, challenges them. Just as many individuals will rely on the same thing that has worked, even if just once because it has "been proven"; believing they have the right method but the wrong target. This isn't just in opinions or ideas, but in mannerisms as well, such as in dating or friendship approaches... but these are another topic for another day... It is said that people do not like change. And I have observed that the most profound change is within oneself. It's easier to deal with changes that are distant, because they have seldom bearing on your life. It's a little harder to deal with changes from family, because they have some bearing on your life. It can be difficult to deal with changes from close friends or loved ones, because they have great bearing on your life. But when it comes to the individual, this can be frightening, stressful, even vulnerable-inducing -- and not too many folks are tickled about any of those three. People tend to resist, so long as there is even a trickle of room to fall back to, instead of tackling something so humbling as change within. The path of least resistance, as it has been said. I remember noticing this about people, peers and adults alike, growing up, and discovering it made people fairly predictable -- because you knew where they'd go, what they'd do; resist anything that made them look bad, feel uncomfortable, or exposed themselves... ... and I could talk about exploiting flaws all day, but again, that is another topic for another day. I will say this though, to truly change, two ingredients are necessary: - A genuine intention. - A desire to persist. How one gets to this point may differ, but however that occurs, unless somebody is genuinely serious and has the will to see it through, then any "changes" are temporary at best. Within the first few moments of warding off obstacles, that lethargic familiarity will settle in and, once again, lifestyle habit has returned. There is comfort in ignorance, just as there is in routine, because we do not want to risk our time spent, being revealed as wasted or pointless. Simplicity allows one to 'accept what is' so that they may simply live, and for several individuals, hatred or bigotry is how they give existence meaning. Think of it like this: You spend a minute on a project, it's whatever. You spend one hour on a project, it becomes a little more difficult to accept failure. Now increase this to years and decades. Imagine spending all your time and energy on this project until, one day, you're told it isn't necessary anymore. It isn't needed, and you wasted time you will never get back. Now replace "project" with, say, religion, a bias, or how one lives their life, and you can begin to understand just why it is so difficult for others to let go, even when something seems toxic or outlandish. This is why it is so hard for myself to let go of anger. But I am working on it, and I have made tremendous strides. I just needed a good slap from reality and a goal, and the process to changing myself was possible. I still fuck up here and there, but it's easier to get back up, just like I suspect it is easier for anybody, who truly wishes to change, to also do, because I've done it so many times now; it is my new lifestyle habit. I was feeling particularly insightful and philosophical tonight. So, in short: Yes, I do believe it is possible for one to change, including their views. But it won't last long, or mean much of anything, unless they are authentic in their intent.
My grandpa was a very conservative Christian fundamentalist kind of guy. In the last year of his life, as his health was declining, I remember him reacting to a news story about the controversy over gay marriage in an unexpected way. He said, "What's the point? Why can't they just let those people be?" A far cry from the usual stuff I heard around his house, up until that point I just assumed he shared all the same views as my uncle. I think as he was on his last legs he must have realized more clearly just how unnecessary bigotry is in this limited life. So yeah, even deeply held beliefs can change.
