Am I bad person for not wanting to date a guy with a STD?

Um well I don't think it's bad so I would say no. I don't think I would date someone with STD's tbh.

 

Date:maybe not a bad person, but is that really a reason not to date somebody?
Have sex with:absolutely not.

 

Nope. I'd never even touch someone with an STD. That's a major deal breaker.

 

Nope...

 

Most STDs/STIs can be controlled and managed by medical treatment and safe sex. So yeah, I'd date somebody with an STD as long as they were consistently careful not to risk infecting me.

 

I'd totally date them, if I liked them. I wouldn't have sex with them though.

 

No, you are not a bad person for not wanting to date someone with a STD, I wouldn't. Most STD's are curable though so once they are cured you might want to give them a chance though, especially if you like them.

 

If they are in the uncured stage for gonorrhea, syphilis, etc., I would not have any type of play with them. Some people are cool with being someone who is HIV+, but I am not sold on PrEP. We don't know the long term effects of it yet. Even when wearing a condom, you are playing Russian roulette. So you are not a bad person at all.

 

Most people don't even know they have STDs unless they make a regular habit of getting checked up. Chlamydia doesn't often have any symptoms and even HIV can take years before it starts affecting your health seriously.

So... you could be dating someone with an STD who might think they don't have one, but do :eek: Safe sex always.

 

I totally agree with this. It can be managed just make sure you're not at risk of contracting it. Even though it is not the greatest thing having an STD, don't reject them because you don't really know them. For all you know they could be the one for you, and you're not giving them a chance.

 

Being careful does not make you a bad person.

 

No, you aren't a bad person! We all have our preferences.

I'd probably say no as well, because I'd worry about how he got it. That being said....there's also plenty of guys out there who have STD's and don't know about it and they keep shoving it in places it shouldn't be going. If a guy was honest about it and said he was getting treatment, etc...I'd be more open.

 

That's your decision. Personally, I think it's a bit mean, if the individual isn't/wasn't whoring themselves out -- and that is how they became infected. But it's your life, and you make the calls for it. If you wouldn't feel comfortable in that relationship, there is no need to bring that kind of conflict into their lives. I'm quite confident their condition already does a fine enough job. Save the two of you unnecessary trouble, too.

As for myself...

I suspect they wouldn't tell me immediately, so I wouldn't know, unless they let it slip, or I found some of their medication laying around. So, date, sure. Provided I had some kind of chemistry with them.

Now, long-term, I would like to think this topic would come up. Despite being a virgin, I would like to go get tested, to show support and in good faith, with my partner. Surely we'd discover something then; and if they are hesitant, well, I now have a reason to wonder.

I wouldn't turn somebody away for just having a STD. Unless they're just so self-destructive, they go out and bang everything, then I would most likely decline, because that is just asking for trouble. If they obtained it in some other manner, like being young and careless once, I might be inclined to take more pity on them. I also cannot, in good faith, turn somebody away who makes a mistake, but is trying to amend for it, because it's too similar to myself.

To condense it:

I doubt I'd know they had anything in the earlier stages, so dating is fine. If we were going to get physical, I'd want to know. We would both get tested. If we got along well, despite their condition, then I'd do what I could. But we'd have to definitely play it safe.

 

Nope, not at all.


Transmittable diseases are something I stay away from. I don't care how nice you are, I don't care if rainbows come out of your ears and sunshine out of your butt.......

I cannot take the chance of having a contagious disease.

 

I'd date a person either way. I'd have sex with a person once they had it out of their system. If it can't be cured, then I'm not taking a chance. Herpes is forever!

 

No I don't blame you I wouldn't want to date someone with an std...you have to protect Yourself

 

Hypothetical question - if you ended up with a STD would you not be offended if someone refused to date you because of it? Even if you had got to know this person and had a real connection to them before admitting it? Bearing in mind my previous point, most of the common ones are easily cured and the ones that can't be cured can be controlled through medication and safe sex.

 

I'd like to be nice and say I'd educate myself and see if it was really still risky with precautions. But, I am a bit of a hypochondriac, so it wouldn't be the best for me. It would be a huge negative.