"I want a gay friend." ~my friends

One of my female co-workers is a fag hag, she prefers Gay friends over straight friends(Male or female)...She said that she made a lesbian friend once, but she broke off the friendship when she was "lured" into a lesbian bar...

 

This kind of mindset is soooooooo offensive ._. Like, what the hell ? Do you really want me to wear make up, skinny jeans, break my wrist and speak with a higher pitch just to fit your stereotypes ? ._.

Usually what girls seek in a gay friend is merely a male friend they can talk to who won't look at them with perverted eyes or try to go out with them. Even when I thought I was bi, girls were like: Oh him ? I know he wouldn't do anything, I trust him.

 

LMAO.

I had a friend in when I was in California, she was like "This is my GAY friend" everywhere we went.

It pissed me off, although I was not mad at her. I had to sit her down and explain it to her, that me liking men had nothing to do with the person I was or how people should perceive me.

I think she understood.

 

Also, they trust me more than my male co-workers...They ask me to give them a massage, hook-up their bra, and they feel comfortable wearing tight fitting tank tops in front of me, but they put on a sweater when they're with my male co-workers...

 

Honestly, I think that your friend who wants a gay friend might not be a bad person to come out to. At least you know that she is not homophobic.

 

I also have a friend who wanted me to be a stereotype of a gay male and it was super awkward when she found out that just because I came out to her, that I wouldn't suddenly shift gears. Poor confused souls. :lol:

 

My girl friend said:
"Having a gay friend is like having a chick with dick!"
I was quite flabbergasted then :dry:

 

Hmm, ironically those who are okay with someone of the opposite sex being gay are usually more bigoted towards those of the same sex... ie fag hags and sexist male douche bags.

 

You know, sometimes it makes me think if we are just being "trophy friends" for them. You know, like being that black friend when some people goes "I am not racist! I have a black friend!" and stuff. Here it would be "I am not homophobic! I have a gay friend!".

 

People like that piss me off. I'd tell her off.

 

Some people say that "I have a lot of gay friends!" to mean that they are not homophobic and they're genuine. I understand they don't mean anything bad but it really does sound annoying :bang:. At least it will give me the excuse to say "I have a lot of straight friends! We have so much in common now"

 

"Act like girls and dress like girls" LOL WTF?? Plus, I think statistics show that most men who do that are heterosexual, they're just more closeted about it.

I think this is a form of fetishization, both offensive to gay men and lesbians. Gay men because they are wanted as friends for stupid stereotypes, and lesbians because It's not safe to come out around them.

I feel the same about men who sexualize lesbians but want to kill gay guys. Disgusting.

 

I've known girls who say stuff like that before, it's really annoying. I understand if you want a gay male friend so that you can have a male friend that won't try to hit on you, but most of the time they just want them as trophies to parade around, and don't seem to understand that not all gay men are some walking stereotype for them to go shopping with.

Just like straight guys who love lesbian porn but hate gay guys, it's so annoying. Especially when these types of people think they're really open minded because of it.

 

Just realized I used "You Know" twice.... So embarrassing. I should go sleep.

In any case, OP's friend seems to have a lot of misconceptions, though it is unlikely that she is malicious in her intent of saying those things. It is just casual ignorance. It hurts, but can't really fault them.

 

This ^

I don't understand either. There are straight guys I know who are far more stereotypically gay then me. These kind of stereotypes really annoy me.

 

One of my friends is always saying how she wants a 'gay friend', and each time she says it I'm so close to saying, "you already have one." But I know what she actually means is she wants a stereotypical gay guy friend because she thinks they're 'so cute!' It really annoys me that half the girls in my year group hate lesbians, but adore gay guys, purely because of stereotypes. In my year group there is one openly bi guy, and one of my other friends who told me she is bi, and none of us are the least bit stereotypical.

 

Implication is that the fact that you are gay is a big part of why she's friends with you and now she can show you off like a trophy.. gross. No girl would get away with introducing me like this

 

Well even though i hate how they considre us pets but i for one need a female friend i like hanging out with them