"You wait ages for a bus to come, and two show up at the same time."

It's beginning to happen to me lol. Earlier, no guys were interested in my at all but now since I'm passively pursuing someone, quite a few guys seem to be flocking towards me. Unfortunately, they'll be left disappointed as I don't like to talk to or actively pursue multiple guys at once.

But yea, this is happening to me right now.

 

Been absolutely flabbergasted at the copious amount of guys flocking to me.

 

Yeah, it's happened to me quite a few times and I have a few theories.

* You gain a certain kind of confidence when you get into a relationship which guys find attractive.

* You tend to relax a lot more, stop trying to impress others and generally become more open when you're in a relationship. Basically because (for a while at least) you're with the only person who's opinion matters.
Relaxed people are a lot more approachable than tense ones.

* You legitimately stop caring what everyone else thinks.

* Some guys show interest when you're single, but they're either really subtle about it and/or you're completely oblivious to it because they don't want to appear desperate or inapprorpriate.
When you start to show signs that you're "going off the market", they must - out of some kind of subconscious desperation - make their attraction to you more obvious.

There's also a few old tedious things that couples always tell you:
* You always find what you're looking for when you stop looking for it
* You get what you want when you stop wanting it

And the law of attraction thing (if you believe in it):
* When you get stuck in the whole wanting/needing/looking/wishing mindset - the universe just gives you more wanting/needing/looking/wishing.
* When you get stuck in the "I have", "I've already won" kind of mindset, then that's what the universe keeps providing - more of the things that you've already got.

 

Just like that...

Yes. Didn't end up well.

 

There's also a decent amount of behavioral study that suggests people actually produce different, subliminally-detectable pheromones depending on their relationship status, intensity of pursuit towards a potential partner, and especially sexual activity.

Supposedly, the more frequently a person is able to engage in sexual activity, the more attractive they become to others on a physiological level, due to elevated pheromones.

Aside from the psychological benefits, even the body responds in a perceivable way to being desired. What weird little machines we pilot.

 

I am not buying all this pheromone stuff. I had quite a bit of casual sex with my friend with benefits in jr. high and high school; no one else pursued me. Although, I realize we had a closeted relationship. If this idea of pheromones was true, I would have had more people into me.

 

Since I'm new, I'm not entirely sure about the rules for posting links to articles or journals, but I promise that if you do some preliminary searching on the topics of 'pheromone production' and 'sexual attraction,' you'll find a great deal of academic debate on the subject, and numerous medical research projects dedicated to tracing potential causes and related influences on human sexual behavior. The primary conclusion that both sides seem to agree upon is that unconscious physiological senses, especially smell, have a clear and proven effect on sexual attraction.

However, there's a big difference between noticing factors that contribute to potential attractiveness and metaphorically spraying oneself with an olfactory love spell, especially when one's sexuality is non-normative. The idea is that things like pheromones help the process along; they're not responsible for it.

 

Yes, I know what you're talking about. When I didn't have my gf nobody noticed me while I desperately wanted a bf! Now that I'm in a relationship, there are some guys who think I'm pretty and stuff like this. It can be a funny thing. xD

---------- Post added 26th May 2015 at 09:25 AM ----------

Completely agree. Couldn't expain it better.

 

It's obviously because it's springtime!