So a lot of times when people come across a gender/sexuality that they aren't very familiar with and they find a person who is that gender/sexuality, they ask that person a lot of questions. I see a lot of anger when this happens and queer people repeatedly saying that it isn't their duty to educate the uneducated, that people who don't know should seek other resources instead of burdening someone with having to teach about their gender and sexuality. And while I can understand how this can be tiring, I really don't understand this anger. Personally, I never get tired of explaining my gender and sexuality to people who don't know about them. I make sure to say that my experiences and feelings aren't like everyone else's and I always point them to some resources that can help them learn more (because it seems letting uneducated people loose to educate themselves could result in a whole lot of miseducation). I try to refrain from asking people about themselves (ie I don't ask my trans friends every single question about trans things), but there are some things that aren't just avaliable. For example, I was trying to learn more about aromanticism and the different subsections of it, and I only found a handful of websites that didn't teach me anything more than I already knew (if anyone is willing to offer assistance with that it would be appreciated). Can anybody offer some insight on any negative feelings toward people asking you to educate them about yourselves? Do you worry they might stumble on the wrong website and never really learn what it is? Am I just worrying too much about wanting everybody to understand everyone else?
It's a good thing if you feel up to educating people. The thing is, we shouldn't have to, and people shouldn't just assume we're okay with talking about it. Personally, I'd find it annoying I think... haven't encountered it yet, but well... if it's out of interest and someone close, sure, I can explain as much as I feel comfortable expaining, otherwise I'd prefer people to leave me be and let me try to live my life...
I hadn't considered the assumption that we're okay talking about it (I was raised in an open household and am a third generation lesbian, so it's hard for me to empathize with people who aren't comfortable talking about their queerness). I see how that's problematic and will certainly mention that the next time I am asked to explain something to a cishet.
I get asked a lot of questions for being vegetarian very often and it gets quite tiring since it kinda feels like I'm being attacked just because it differs from the norm. I know it's not the same but I can understand why people get frustrated because there's this feeling of being attacked. As LGBT I feel like we have a responsibility to make sure people are educated since our schools aren't good enough at it. So whenever it comes to LGBT issues, I'm always "on". If someone starts talking about anything related to it I will jump into the discussion. I want to change peoples opinion to the better and I feel like I have enough knowledge and solid arguments to at least tickle their mind a bit. With that said, it can get quite tiring to argue with someone that is convinced that their completely wrong idea is fact. So I understand that some LGBT will just "give up" because it's much more convenient to just not get involved, basically.
