Last night, I was Googling some of my old friends to see what they're up to now. I used to live in MN, I moved there when I was in 2nd grade then moved to MA when I was in 4th grade. There was a girl who was in my 3rd and 4th grade classes and I remembered her because her first name was also one of my middle names. I typed her name in the search bar and the first thing that popped up was her name and the name of the city I used to live in when I lived in MN. I thought, "oh she must have a Twitter or she must put herself out there a lot, that's pretty cool". Not even close; I clicked on it and all these memorial and obituary sites come up. It turns out that she died in 2012 when she was just 12. She was riding her bike along the highway on the way to school just a block away from her house and she got hit by a car. I was really surprised and it kind of ruined my night. We were pretty good friends when I lived in MN, and she was just a month older than me. I remember watching a docudrama about Columbine and a survivor who was interviewed said, "When you're young, you think you're indestructible and life goes on forever. It was kind of a wake up call for me, a realization that that isn't actually true." I think in a way, he was spot on. I sometimes say how I'm waiting for my life to really begin, meaning I'm waiting to turn 18, to get job, and all that. But really, my life is here and it's being played out. And it can be cut off at any time. And that's what I don't like about death. It's so unpredictable. You don't know if you're going to die in 70 years or if you will die tomorrow. I doubt the people who lost their lives on 9/11 or in Columbine knew they were going to die that day. I doubt my friend went on that bike ride knowing it would be her last. You can't even prepare yourself, it just happens. You don't know if it's instant and if you'll be gone just like that, or if you'll suffer slowly and get the chance to say bye to everyone you love. And you don't know how you will die either. It's all so random and uncalled for. I'm the type of person who likes to know things ahead of time so I can prepare and be organized, so maybe that's why I'm so put off by it. And then there's the whole conversation about what happens after death; is that just it? Is there an afterlife? Are you reincarnated? Of course that goes into religion and personal beliefs, but how can we be sure what we believe is actually going happen? I don't want to be in for nasty surprise when I die. Anyway, I don't know. I just needed to get this off my chest.
First of all I'm deeply sorry to hear about what happened to your friend.. ;-; Death is inevitable but It's my belief that a problem you can't do anything to solve is even less worth worrying about than one you can. Enjoy life to it's fullest and live well while you're alive!~ Try not to waste any time thinking about death if you can avoid it.
Then get the stinking Republicans out of Congress. Do you realize how much money they have vampirically drained from medical research? The "sequestration" is effectively mass murder on a scale we haven't seen before in our lifetimes. If you have a desire to live, then do consider trying to help us who also have a desire to live get more money into fighting deadly diseases. It may be hard to grasp, but these diseases are actually going to kill you. These diseases are things that are going to cause you to die screaming in pain and puking up your feces because the opiates we give you to try to drown out part of the pain cause you massive, deadly constipation. It is actually what is going to happen to you. It is not a "sorta-kinda-maybe" kind of thing. Anyhow, if believing in an afterlife helps you sleep at night, then go right ahead, but believing in one isn't going to make one happen. For all that you know, believing in one without actual evidence could cause you to lose any right you might ever have had to one. Here is the best said perspective that I have seen on the matter, by Bo Burnham: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zxc20saM8DA Anyhow, the only really helpful thing that I can say to you, on the matter, is that the evidence available to us suggests that the actual event of death is vaguely pleasurable. Your neurons, as they die, release chemicals that confer a sort of euphoric sensation. There is nothing to fear about it. It is a very comfortable thing to happen to you. That said, though, there is a lot in this world to experience. That final "high" at the end will not be improved by being in a haste to see it, whereas there are many interesting things you can do with your life. Me? I want to be able to look back on my life and feel a sense of pride in my accomplishments. It's a little vain, but it's important to me. If you just spend a lot of time fearing death, though, then you ought to wonder: are you afraid of death, or are you afraid of life? Life is a much harder thing to face. It's also much more interesting, though.
You can't walk around being afraid of death. Some die young, some die old. You just have to make the best of what you have - because you don't know what's on the other side. NOBODY does... Regardless of what ANYONE believes in, there's no proof. I do, however, think that it's good to believe in something - it'll keep you sane. It's crazy to think about how we're alive for less than 100 years (maybe a tad more, if you're extremely lucky) and the universe will go on FOREVER. It gives me chills and anxiety to even discuss this, I have to stop now lol
(*hug*) <3 We can't live our lives fearing of the inevitable, or what is to come. We can hope things will be alright in the end as we want it, even if it doesn't alleviate the fear and anxiety. But there's many things in life that are worthy of feeling afraid, anxious, or upset over... That shouldn't stop us from whatever we do to live, it shouldn't stop us from doing what we want to be happy. I deeply empathize with the sentiments you hold her Madame, I really do. But letting the unknown and the inevitable get you down isn't going to make any light of your situation. (*hug*) Be the best you can be, and do all that you can to make the best of everything around you. I'm sorry for what happened with your friend. I hope you're feeling at least a little better hearing these posts. You don't need to be worrying about all of this, you have too many good things ahead of you, and too much great for you to do.
That's the curse of humanity; only we are cursed with the knowledge that death is inevitable and there comes a time in everybody's life where one faces that--your moment just arrived. Now is when you make a choice. You can either choose to be afraid and let it control you or you can realize that life is a gift and that each day is precious.
What you believe, isn't what I believe. I believe when I die I won't exist anymore. It's sad to think about really. But there is no solid reason to believe in fairy tales, and I won't believe in them just because they make me feel a little better. I would have to throw away logic at that point. I don't think I could even if I wanted to, I know to much about religion being a bunch of bullshit. So after I went through my atheistic phase, reading books by Richard Dawkins, and Christopher Hitchens, and watching God debates with those two and Lawrence Krauss, and other notable mind expanders like Neil Degrasse Tyson talking about the Universe, I've decided to sway away from thinking about religion and death, it's just depressing and a waste of time.
I'm actually an atheist, I don't really believe in an afterlife like heaven and hell. I do think there's something, I don't think we just stop existing. We're too complex for that in my opinion, and that contradicts or invalidates our lives and our purpose in the first place. But seem that's an opinion, I'm not sure if that really is what the end is like. I don't really want to die then see that there was a god and I'm going to hell for not believing, thinking about that gives me anxiety,
The fact is that we are "complex" specifically because our consciousness is composed of an ongoing conversation among several billion neurons. The number of neurons, of which your brain is composed--among severalfold more of your poor, underappreciated glial cells, which are every bit as important to the fullness of your character and identity--of exceeds, by leaps, bounds and multiples the entire human population of the Cosmos. You are a civilization of simple organisms, and each of those "simple" organisms are, in actuality, really inconceivably complex, intricate structures, each of which has a unique "personality" of its own. Each of those that you slaughter, through your bad habits and poorly controlled stress, is a unique and irreplaceable entity. And the thing is, there is always the possibility that the real deity of the universe would really send you to Hell for believing things without actually having evidence for that belief. You would therefore burn for hypocritical belief when you might have salvaged yourself by honest skepticism. I certainly wouldn't take a liar or a hypocrite into my presence if I were a deity, and I would not think very much of a deity who would. Any deity that were worthwhile would respect the honest skeptic over the hypocrite. If I am damned for that, then I could imagine no greater honor and no better dignity than to be damned by a deity that is really a worthless scoundrel who surrounds himself with beseeching hypocrites and false friends. My feeling is that, if you choose a religious faith, then it ought to be because you actually believe in the mission of that faith. It ought to be because you have been to a particular church and truly respect and honor what they are trying to do. Follow a deity, if you must follow one, out of sincere and honest faith, not because you are fearful of being damned by one that you don't truly believe in, honor or respect. The world is really very miserable because it is filled with Christians who are only really there because they expect something in return, and if I were the deity of the Cosmos, I would burn most of them before I would the average atheist, not that there aren't Christians, here and there, who are actually deserving. But I am pretty sure that the "end" is fairly pleasant. The only unpleasant aspects you will have to contend with are only there because our populace continues to drag their feet on allowing physicians to actually spare us from having to deal with them. If you are not interested in spending the last months of your life vomiting up your feces, which is a part of what a death from cancer involves, then I suggest getting the damn useless Republicans out of Congress as expeditiously as possible, so we can have a hope of arranging for a "death with dignity" law. And asking "What is the meaning of life?" is like inquiring into the number of corners on a circle. A circle that has neither four 90-degree corners nor four equal sides is not a defective square, and a life that has no particular use assigned to it is not a defective chattel. You are not a piece of equipment, but you are a person. You choose your own destiny, and your life's meaning must be of your own invention. Whether you like it or not, you are free.
I'm not really afraid of death. I think it's kinda dumb to be afraid of something that happens to everyone eventually. Personally, I don't really care if I die young or if I die when I'm older. (Though I don't want to live so long that I have to live in a nursing home or have memory loss or get any of my bones replaced or something. Ughhh)
OP, I feel ya. Sometimes I've wished that I could be immortal just to rid myself of the anxiety of death. Not only immortal, it'd be great if I stopped growing. Heck, I'd like to be younger. Kinda like the opposite of that movie, "Big."
