Do any other queer females get asked this question? It absolutely drives me crazy. I just don't feel like being with men at the moment. It just seems gross. Why would I want to try them out? I might fall in love with one in the future, doesn't mean I want to try both.
I'm still kinda in the questioning phase so that question pops up frequently. People tell me to try both and see which one I like best. I don't want to do that.
Yeah, some people just don't understand: you don't just go out looking for men in order to have sex with them. Well, some of us do, but many of us end up having sex with a man because he is someone we know, in our everyday lives, whom we trust and are able to share a part of ourselves with. Why sex with a man instead of a woman? Because, when I am having a long, meandering conversation with a woman while gazing over a sunset beach on a still evening, I don't go into a pheremone-induced funk and start babbling stupid nonsense. With a woman, a pheremone reaction doesn't make me so nervous that I drink eight shots of straight vodka without thinking about it. It is and always has been pheremones. But you can't just pick how you react to people.
The pheromones really throw things off for me. When I'm looking at pictures of males or talking to a guy I often think I could become attracted. When I smell their pheromones I get an "ew it's a man" reaction.
I'm a queer woman who has tried both. It is all about those pheromones as you all have been saying. If there is something disgusting about men to you, why should you have to try it out? I say these people who ask this just don't get it, they are ignorant.
I'm bisexual, so not the perspective you're looking for, but the thing is... it's not about "trying." That's what they have to understand. Even just the idea of "trying something out" makes me feel sick, when you're talking about actual people. But yes, the question is very common, and it's normal to be irritated by it.
When someone asks me that, it's usually a straight man, and I reply "Why don't YOU try both?" They usually shut the hell up after that.
Yeah, I already have. I would say, 'I have and obviously that sex did not measure up'. That usually shuts them down.
Same here. And I know that they mean well, but it doesn't exactly work that way (at least not for me). I kind of would like to develop a relationship with someone before, you know, sleeping with them. And just how many guys should I "try" before I determine whether I'm interested in men or not? How many women would I have to sleep with to be sure absolutely sure I like women?
I think it's silly people are told to "try" a gender out. Uhh, I didn't have to try out guys before I knew I liked guys. Years later when I was questioning whether I did in fact like girls more than the normal straight girl, my friend told me the only way to know was to experiment. A few weeks later I had concluded that I was into girls, and I didn't have to have meaningless sex with them to find out. Besides, sex is sex, it's probably going to be enjoyable for me. I was questioning whether I was romantically into girls. Most straight people that say this have never tried out the same sex just to be sure lol.
I am the same with women. Wow, women look great in well-made porn! Especially if they have the cute, innocent and genuine pin-up girl look, not the "slutty porn star" look. OMG, they're so hot! Woooooo! Put us close together? I'm like..."Oh, yeah...hi! Uh...okay. Philosophy. Yeah...okay..." What? No discussions on quasi-spirituality? No sense of beautiful sunsets? No poetry? What happened to the romantic fool who chases hot studs? Where is he? He's...chasing hot studs. That's where he is. But I can look at a picture of a pretty lady all day. Boobs! Yay!
