Self-harm thread

Fun fact: A lot of people that self-harm know all of this already, and it takes more than just willpower to stop. We know it's bad. We know it's not rational, and self-harm doesn't happen during rational thinking. And to some, it's more of an addiction and that's the kind of mindset that needs to be changed. Again, that's really not without professional help.

Now with all of that said, I'm glad that there's a thread about this to discuss and talk about it. It's an issue that does need to be discussed on a support forum, I think. And I think it would be very helpful to have members who've gone through self-harm as well as the process of getting out of it, so that others can do the same.

If anybody's interested, I'm willing to share my whole story on the matter.

 

Sums it up pretty well...I used to be there. This is pretty much exactly how I felt at the time. I haven't done it in years though now...

Edit: I am also willing to talk and help people out if they want it.

 

I second this.

As a former self-harmer, I understand the thought process. I know the feelings that leads to self harm and I know how hard it is to let go of that security blanket. It really is hard to quit without professional help and guidance, and the self harmer has got to want to stop. It takes a LOT of willpower and self control. I've been self-harm free for 4 years now and even though I haven't self-harmed in 4 years, the urge IS still there sometimes. Self harm is a coping mechanism. "We hurt ourselves on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside"

It's not easy for non-self harmers to grasp. We are often labelled "insane" "mentally unstable" "desperate for attention" "weak". But it's much more than that. There are certain feelings that cannot be put into words. And the only way we know to express it, is through self harm. When you're at that point, holding the blade in your hand, your mind pretty much goes blank and the only thing you can focus on is the intense emotions you feel and the urge to get rid of it. Be it anger, sadness, frustration, boredom, whatever. It is our way of dealing with intense emotions and like I mentioned in the previous paragraph, it's hard to let go of that security blanket.

I think you made a great thread, so that people who need to vent, can vent and get some support through other EC'ers. Thank you for starting this thread (*hug*)

 

I think it's important to understand that for many people who self harm (or self injure) it's a coping mechanism, albeit a destructive one, that helps to keep them safer. It's not a suicide attempt at all -- if someone self harms to cope, it's because they want to live, not because they want to die.

Before someone can begin to break the relationship with self harm, they need to find alternative coping strategies that work. There are distraction techniques (some already mentioned) that help people to surf the urge, but there are no quick fixes or solutions and that's why we shouldn't insist that someone just stops. It's not that simple. If good coping strategies have not been established first, you can make a 'self harmer' even more vulnerable. Alongside coping strategies and distraction techniques, it's very important to talk about it and all of the underlying feelings that trigger the urge to self harm and that's where professional help may be necessary.

Empty Closets - Self-Injury Behavior