Is anybody here a teacher?

Not just yet but studying to be one.
The Netherlands being very gay friendly, at least as far as public education is concerned, being gay doesn't really come up, unless students find out of course.
We certainly never treated the gay teachers we know about any different, except for making stupid jokes, the same way we made jokes about the fat teacher, or the smelly teacher etc, etc.

I don't think any of my students last year, during my first internship, realised I was LGBT, nor would they have cared much I'd think.

 

I am

 

I'm studying to be a teacher. I'm in my last semester, and will be student teaching this semester. As far as I know, Kasey, CJLiving (think that's it), and Jonathan (think that's his EC name or it used to be) are all teachers. I've been put in the classroom as apart of my field experience and I just sort of go about my business, the students that I taught for my field experience seem to have all liked me. Of course living in Texas, I would be treading water if I was out as a teacher.

 

I am.

 

Yes, I was. I grew up with multiple fairly openly gay teachers - English, Gym, Latin, Choir... there were plenty. It was not really a time or place to be out, but everybody knew, and they were mostly great teachers, so nobody cared.

I taught in a major city with a very large LGBTQ population. However, it was made very clear to me that being out was a threat to my job, because I worked in an area that was mostly recent immigrants whose cultures were extremely homophobic. I was not closeted, but I did not discuss my personal life at work. At that suited me just fine, because I don't like to discuss my personal life at work anyway. But, I would never have denied it if asked, and I openly supported gay rights and different-sexuality issues in front of the students all the time. The kids were in high school, and plenty were openly gay or figuring it out, so I tried to support them in that and foster a school and classroom community where they could be themselves. There were plenty of other gay/lesbian/bi teachers at school, and while we were all out to each other, no one was out to the parents or spoke about their own lives much in front of the kids. Our principal and assistant principal were also very homophobic, so we knew we didn't have any support there. It is a totally different thing, when you're working with kids. This was 10 years ago, anyway, so it was a bigger deal than it is now.

Now I teach college, and that is entirely different. Professors can do whatever the hell they want to a certain extent and call it "academic," and also I still never like to discuss my personal life at work so I would never bring it up to students because it is a much bigger risk with college kids that a social line cannot be crossed - we are not equals, we don't date each other or hit on anybody or anything like that. So me discussing my sexuality with them in any context outside of an academic one where it is relevant (which I'm fine to do where appropriate, because I'm not closeted) is going to seem like I'm coming onto a student or being inappropriate in some way. My home life is none of their business, unless we are illustrating a point for a class - and in very few classes would that even make any sense. I'm not afraid to be gay in front of them, but I am fairly young and I have had students hit on me before, so I like to keep the boundaries very clear that home is home and work is work. But I am involved in my university at an activist level for LGBTQ causes, so it's not exactly a secret, and I speak professionally on this subject from time to time at my university, like in lobbying for an LGBTQ minor at the school as an academic subject with its own governing program.

My personal feeling is, straight or gay, keep your attractions in your pants around students. You can be openly who you are, but never ever date or have relations or even a fuzzy line with a student, or you open yourself up to all kinds of drama, disciplinary actions, and possibly the ruining of your career. Plus doing so while teaching abroad in another country can open you up to legal problems or violence. You are there to teach, not to find dates. So being gay shouldn't be a problem in that context, because you are showing your employer, the students, and their parents if applicable, that it does not impact your work or your value to them as an educator. You can advocate for LGBTQ rights where appropriate, and support a student's coming out, but you have a clear professional line drawn so that people feel safe around you as a teacher, that you will never try to be anything more with anyone. And, a lot of times the people who you want to know you are gay know that already, they don't need you to shout it to non-gay people because they have some "gaydar" - so you don't need to risk your position, or your personal safety, if that is the case, by making a point to make it known to straight administrators and parents.

Some people will be loud and proud in those situations, and that is the right thing to do if you believe in the cause and are willing to risk everything for it. I personally found a more subtle approach to work well for me, since I was open in my support for the issues no matter where I worked, and I never ever denied who I was. Plus since I made my support of the issues clear in other ways by asking colleagues to participate with me as a school group in the AIDS Walk, or to discuss LGBTQ bullying at school, it didn't really matter whether I personally could be classified as gay or not. I was clearly a big ally, and not ashamed of that, and I know it changed the school culture of all of the places I have worked at to be so so openly. In fact, in the first school with the homophobic principal, the AIDS Walk became an annual school event that he himself marched in, even though the proceeds went to a gay men's group and there were many openly gay people and organizations marching every year. So that was a little bit of progress, without getting all political and up in people's faces about who I have sex with when I'm not at work. Because that remains none of their damn business.

---------- Post added 11th Aug 2015 at 11:59 PM ----------

As an additional thought which might be useful to you, one teacher I worked with, who was both an English and Music teacher (and also happened to be a really hot Asian gay guy) dealt with his sexuality this way: I overheard some students common to both of us at one point make a generalization about what he would be doing over the holiday break. They said something like "When you're home and celebrating with your girlfriend - wait, you're not married, right? - no, right, no ring, ok... so with your girlfriend... then you guys will probably have a nice dinner together, and see family, and..." they went on to describe the situation they envisioned, to make another point that I do not remember.

He stopped them gently, and corrected them. "I would be at home with my boyfriend, but yes, the rest of it is right, go on..." Now, he totally didn't have to say that, but that's one of those instances where not to say it would be to deny who he is. So the kids' eyes got really wide, and they said "Wait - really??" and then they were pretty surprised, and then one yelled down the hall to a friend "Yo, did you know Mr. XXXX is GAY?" and then said to him "I mean, it's cool, not that it's a big deal or anything." And the other kid down the hall said "Really? EW, that's gross!" And the other girl who was standing there said quietly "my cousin is gay. I don't think there's anything wrong with it." And so the teacher said "Well, I am at home with my loved one just like everyone else you know is doing, it's not any different, we're just normal people."

And I said, "Right. So? It's no big deal. We're all at home with whoever we're home with, and what matters is that we're family, they care about us and we care about them, right? There are lots of different kinds of families. Right, (girl YYYY)? You live at home with your grandmother, right? And you, (boy ZZZZ), you live at home with your mom and your 2 uncles, right? But they're all families. And that's got nothing to do with how good of a student you are, or how good of a teacher either of us is, right? You go home and you love the people you love, and then you come to school and you do your best to do your work. That's what the kids do, and that's what the teachers do."

And the kids seemed to feel relaxed about it, and although the rumor did spread through the whole class, it did not spread through the whole school, or to the parents that I know of, and nobody made a big deal out of it anymore. And initially, that kid down the hall who was homophobic mentioned it again the next day, and the kid I talked to said "Yeah, he's gay, but who cares? He's a good teacher. And he goes home and loves who he loves just like any of us. That's still a family. And then he comes here and he does his work. It's not a big deal." So I smiled at that. And the kid who felt creeped out shrugged his shoulders and was like, "Yeah, I guess he is nice, so I guess it's ok..." And that was that. Another girl overheard the conversation and said "But that's a sin." And the kids took care of it. One said to her, "No it's not." And another said, "Maybe it is, but that's between Mr. XXXX and God, it's not up to you to judge. He's never been anything but nice to any of us." And that was pretty much it. The girl fortunately was nice about it and agreed that was his own thing to deal with, and that she liked him, and they went back to focusing on school.

Not all situations work out this nicely. Some can be violent or dangerous, or way more unpleasant. But in a large city in the US, this is often how it will go, all the more so now. In other countries, and especially in rural areas, it might go very differently. You have to judge how you want to deal with each situation individually. But these kids seemed to learn a lesson out of it, and in fact one of the kids in the original crowd came out a year later, so you never know if that whole incident helped there or not. But it was great to see the other students shrug it off at that point as not a huge deal.

 

Yeah, go for it!

 

I am over here in Korea~ ^.^

People are getting a little more progressive here, but there are no anti-discrimination laws, so if they decide they want to fire you because you're gay, then they will do it with no recourse. My first place thought I was a lesbian and spread the rumour around that I was boinking another teacher... it was an awkward conversation and one I had to publicly dismiss... Another teacher had someone call his school and complain that he didn't want a gay guy teaching his kids because who knows what he might be teaching them/doing to them... luckily the principal loved him and was like, "I know you're not really a parent here, and he is a really good teacher so stop harassing him." I've also had to listen to anti-lgbt and racist diatribes and I can't do too much about it without fear of recourse... If you keep your private life at home, it would be for the best where I am. I'm not sure about other countries over here in Asia, but those have been my experiences here. T.T

 

I've done some TEFL work in both East and South Asia, and I have to second candyjiru's suggestion that discretion is generally the wisest policy for teachers (and especially foreign teachers) in much of that part of the world.

 

Yeah, CJliving is an EFL teacher in Japan.

 

I just got my teaching license this June