study: Children know who their parents favourite is

I know for sure with my parents that my eldest brother is the ultimate favourite child. Followed closely by my older sister. I'm third only because I kind of demand the attention, while my twin brother is sort of distant. I think that a lot of children pick up on this.

 

Sadly it is all too true, and almost unavoidable in some families.

No parent wants to be perceived as playing favourites, they (usually) think they are being equitable, until they realize the damage they do to the less favoured child. I don't know how this can be dealt with. I am almost certain however that calling them on it, or a confrontation will not work, it could be serious enough to require a qualified professional, a family therapist, to deal with it.

 

This kid seems to know :lol:

Luckily I have won't have that issue "who's your favourite?" "Dad", yay!

[YOUTUBE]KWFfDyupGpQ[/YOUTUBE]

 

Yes. It's kind of obvious. I'm the favorite, out of two children -- at least for my mother. She wanted a son, not a daughter, but she grew to love having a little girl she could dress beautifully and cuddle and hug and be girly with.
My father doesn't play favorites, but if he had to have one, it might very well be me, if only because I'm a girl and the younger one.

I wonder whether my parents knew whom we preferred, out of the two. I think it likely, too, and that puts things in perspective for me. It must sting that way around, too.

 

Sons really are their mother's favourites as 88 per cent admit treating boys differently | Daily Mail Online

 

I am not the favorite.
It is because I hate sports.

 

I am the favorite, but that's because I have no siblings haha

 

Let's see, it might have been me. My sister is always complaining about all the things I get that she never had. In my defense, I went through a lot of suffering she didn't have to.

 

Of course my parents favoured my younger sister over my older sister and me. I think that's kinda usual if one of their children is still a "baby" while the others are almost teens. But now that everyone one of us is an adult or almost an adult, they don't favourite anyone of us. At least, I didn't notice something like that in the last years.

 

My mum jokes that I'm her favourite, but my sister is 9 years older than me so it's not a fair comparison. I think it's obvious that she treated me and my sister differently given my sister was a teenager while I was just a child. I definitely received more presents than her at Christmas.

But by all accounts, she was just as spoilt, if not more so, than I was when she was a kid.

I have a cousin who is an only child - nobody else in our family is - and she was spoilt beyond all belief while we were growing up (she's 8 months younger than me). My mum is one of 6 siblings and she told me that her father had a favourite, and it definitely wasn't her, while her mum favoured her over the others.

 

My younger sister, hands down, is the favorite.

She's married, has two degrees, and has friends. But more importantly, she came into the world at a much better time than I did, and will always have that advantage. Though my parents have both admitted I'm a lot smarter than my sister, that is as far as it goes. In every other aspect she trumps me when it comes to our parents, and she likes to remind me of this sometimes, especially when she wants me to do her favors.

 

I know that I'm the favorite, my brother knows I'm the favorite, my sister knows I'm the favorite. Don't know why though.

 

I'm the least favorite of my siblings ^^"

 

My mother doesn't have an obvious favorite. She's more into having the whole family together as a unit. With my father it's obvious my youngest brother is his favorite. I'm not sure if I come in second or our other brother does. It may be a toss up, as neither of us get along particularly well with him.

 

It's interesting that you'd mention that. My parents always thought I'd be a boy, so they were surprised when they found out I was a girl. :lol: I don't know why, apparently they just "felt" it.

In terms of being the favourite, I think I used to be until I became a teenager. I get more stuff than my sister does because she has being living away from home until recently so I've been getting more attention than her. But now they just see me as a no good teenager, which I must admit to. :icon_bigg(!)

 

Everyone knows that parents play favorites. Often times they have aversion to the idea that they have a favorite because they are embarrassed of the idea that they don't treat their children equally. They want this illusion for the world to see that they are model parents with equally treated children. But why would they need to be ashamed? all families have "the favorite". And it's not like children don't play favorites as well. As children we have the favorite parent, the favorite sibling.

There are many factors to having a favorite.
(1) The age of the children. Yes often times the favorite are in favor of either the eldest or the youngest. With the youngest child the Theory of Succession comes into play, he/she naturally succeeds to the attention, care, etc offered by the parents to their elder children.
(2) The stereotypical--- mom is closer to boy, dad is closer to girl. Personally I believe this is a subconscious carry over of our Oedipus Complex and Electra Complex, which are completely natural things. Might also be a subconscious primitive instinct (from our ancestors)--- dads would view their male children as competition, moms would view their daughters as competition.
(3) A matter of whom child has more needs. Parents pay more attention and exert more effort towards the child who can less fend off for himself compared to his siblings. Such as the youngest child, a sickly child, a child with a medical condition.
(4) Sometimes the general nature of the child also plays a factor. One child may be easier to get along with, while the other is difficult. One child listens while the other one is stubborn. One excels at things while the other doesn't. Etc
(5) The relationship between Parent-Child can be comparable to friendships. We have friends, we have close friends and we have best friends. We just naturally get along with one friend better than the others. We may share the same interests and hobbies. Etc

I think the taboo lies when we confuse LOVE for FAVORITE. Parents love their children equally. As an example they'll grieve them equally when they die (a morbid example though), they equally send all of their children to school, equally provide for their needs (shelter, food, etc). But favoritism is another, it's natural and shouldn't be taboo.

As for my family I am the Favorite, everybody knows it. Much to the ire of my eldest brother and elder sister. Why? well these are just factors:
(1) I'm the youngest. It was but natural for me to inherit the attention, resources, etc offered by my parents to my siblings. Plus my age gap with my older siblings also factor in. My parents always tell me that I'll always be their "baby".
(2) I mentioned in my very first post here on EC that I have a condition that makes it common for me to be in the hospital. My parents always think of this and is one of the factors why they want me to marry. They worry of who would take care of me when they're gone.
(3) As the youngest I was mom's little helper. She brought me everywhere from shopping to visiting her sister (my aunt), etc We practically were always together when I was young. When I became an adult I just naturally connected with my dad, we are like minded in some aspects. We are like minded in certain issues and how we tend to approach things. During conversations we are the two who generally agree with each other.
(4) I just excelled at things growing up. I was an honor student during my younger years and would win competitions (writing, art, science). And I was a scholar during my undergraduate BSN and Medical School.

It's not one thing that makes one child the favorite, but several factors.

 

BIRTH ORDER
Me
My sister
My brother

FAVORITE ORDER
My sister
Me
My brother (He'll be higher than me as soon as I come out)

... I feel bad for my brother especially since he is basically the boy version of me. I just hope he doesn't grow up as sad and as lonely as me. We are both very misunderstood in our own special ways.

 

I'm obviously the favorite, and the oldest of 4. I think my parents like me more because the other sibs can be honestly spoiled and bratty, and since both of my parents have worked all summer, I've babysitted the younger ones and did most chores. They just know I'm the most responsible and best behaved.
Although to be honest I wish they were a little less obvious about it, I don't want my siblings feeling bad about it

 

as much as it pains me to say (or not) i;m the oldest and...i am my mothers favorite, after my dad left me and her became really close because i was the only other person in the the house old enough to understand why he left and how it was it happened. and then after having come out to her we became even closer. Although i am also the best behaved? and like someone else said they also did, i babysit all the time and am usually the one left to do and or assign the chores when my moms at school which is coming again soon but i tend not to argue with my mom so i think that;s why although she won;t admit it...i'm her favorite. but i tend to get along REALLY well with older women my middle aged+ female teachers LOVE me haha my friends notice, and so do other teachers it's nice though i like this "gift"