If you caught your lover cheating would you AUTOMATICALLY leave them?

I would give them a second chance, but not a third.

 

I wouldn't know what to do, most likely be hurt and go eat some icecream... So maybe?

 

I would tell them to gather their things and leave ASAP. I have zero tolerance for people who betray me.

 

I'm interpreting this in the context of my current partner. I have to say it would depend on the situation. Having been together 29 years, throwing away the relationship over a single incident of *any* kind is not something to do lightly. On the other hand, I have zero tolerance for abuse.

If my sense was that the violation constituted abuse, that would be it, I'm afraid...no room for that in any relationship. But I doubt that would be the case. More likely, it would be the kind of one-thing-leads-to-another mistake that I've nearly been swept up in multiple times in my life. Having nearly made that kind of mistake more than once, I would have to be at least somewhat understanding...although having specifically *not* made that mistake multiple times and having been very scrupulous and respectful about involving my partner in my entire evolution in the direction of polyamory (and hearing her repeated assertion that she does not need anyone but me), I would be rather hurt and put-off. But again, I cannot throw away 29 years of love, shared history, language, etc. easily.

 

I don't know. Part of me would want to give them a second chance, another would say "he cares more about his dick then he does about me- that's pretty much 'game over'".

 

Considering my love is a plush doll, it's physically impossible for her to cheat on me. One plus to being object sexual. :icon_wink

 

Yes I would.

 

I checked the wrong answer...

Ultimately, I would. The probability of me choosing to remain in that relationship would be as close to none as one could definitively say. The lone saving grace might be if they informed me immediately after before I would have been intimate with them again, but that nearly never happens and severe damage would already have been done.

 

If I ever do find my twin flame or whoever. I think they'd be rather confused thinking "Am I in trouble or no?".

If I caught him in bed with another man, I would introduce myself to the man my husband or boyfriend was cheating with at the time, then I'd ask for their name. Then I'd sit right in between them and start a counseling session for them. Afterward they'll leave being mentally mind fucked. Oh of course we'd still be friends though... Best friends.. XD Charlie and the chocolate factory reference lolz

 

I'd be really hurt, and feel betrayed, but I'd still give them a chance to explain themselves before making the ultimate decision. It's more the "why" rather than the "did", if that makes any sense.

 

If he made an account on a site like Ashley Maddison, then yeah, to the curb.

It's really difficult for me to fully trust people, so I think while I could forgive, I wouldn't forget. The trust would be ruined, so it would probably be te end of the relationship either way.

 

I said "depends on the person/situation," but I would most likely leave them. Trust if very important to me and cheating is a definite no-no. Something that I want any and all partners of mine to know is that if they are unhappy for whatever reason, they need to tell me. Please don't cheat or lie to me, tell me. If we can figure it out and make it work, we will. If not, we go our separate ways.

 

For sure. Sorry

 

I lean yes, but I can't say for sure; so I put depending on the situation/person.

 

Yes, but I would also automatically leave them if they were too unwilling to trust me (for example, by spying on me, trying to read my email or pick up my phone when I'm not looking).

 

By Theory it depends on the situation, I guess. Like the extent of the relationship between the two of them. How long it had been. How remorseful and willing to change he is. Etc.

By Practice Yes I'd leave him. Happened to me in the past. I found a lump on my guy's arm and diagnosed it as Lipoma, I told him it needed to be excised, a minor surgery. He consulted with a surgeon and he confirmed my diagnosis. I had a pre-scheduled site visit for a project our family business had. It was a big project, hence it was highly important I'd be there since I was in charge of setting the budget and financing the project. His surgery was scheduled the same day. I told him I couldn't back out of my engagement but would go straight to him afterwards. Due to unforeseen circumstances and needs I had to work for longer than expected.

After work I told him I was on my way. He said he was already with another person. The guy was the same guy he was dating the same time he dated me. I was shocked. How did this guy now of his surgery? Obviously they were in communication before that.

I broke it off by night. I value myself too much.

 

Same. I dont want to live or be in a relationship with a person I dont trust anymore

 

They would be out of my life before they could start formulating the first "I'm sorry."

It's not even a matter of trust for me, it's a matter of self-respect. More so than a betrayal, I see this as an insult. You were mocking my intelligence and my loyalty, you might as well have spat on my face and taunted me to do something about it. I hold myself in too high a regard to let that kind of shit slide, and ultimately I fail to see the point in staying with someone that doesn't respect you. G T F O