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Why 'come out'?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by -Michael-, Jan 7, 2009.

  1. -Michael-

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    Personally I don't think we should have to come out.

    Lord knows my brother never as a straight person, or my father, or my friends....
    or anyone for that matter...


    So i say we all just do as we please.

    For example:
    If you like someone, GO FOR IT! Kiss them if the opportunity arrives.
    Be in a gay relationship.
    Then when you bring them home and your parents go "What's this?"
    you say "My boyfriend/girlfriend"
    Then when they say "What the hell!!! Why didn't you tell us?"
    you say "Didn't think it was that big a deal..."
    "I don't recall (older sibling) telling you they're straight"
    Then you go upstairs and have loud as hell sexy time!!!


    Just like all nomal relationships. :wink:

    haha

    WE SHOULDN'T NEED THIS FORUM!
    NIFTY THOUGH IT IS!!!
    I DON'T SEE A FORUM SUPPORTING PEOPLE FOR BEING STRAIGHT!!
     
  2. Mickey

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    People don't need support to be straight. That's what's "expected" of them.
     
  3. RaRa

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    Yeah, it's assumed that everyone is heterosexual, so unless you tell them that's what they think.
     
  4. James2612

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    It would be great if we lived in a world where gay was as "normal" as straight. For example people dont just assume your straight!!!!

    BUT unfortunatly people do assume your straight (unless your actions and personality clearly show other wise!!) - and so we gay people will allways need to "come out"!!! But like you say, we shouldnt have to - people shouldnt assume every one is straight unless told other wise!!!
     
  5. McBenz

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    I think that coming out should'nt be a big deal. like i don't think you should (for me anyways) come out and say "i'm gay" at the family christmas. i think we should have an open relationship with whoever you fancy and let people ask you. they'll figure it out.

    i don't like labels lol so kiss ur girlfriend/boyfriend in public. even if being gay isn't the "norm"
     
  6. thebikelady

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    I seriously may wind up just going this route. People have to be pretty suspect of me anyway. I kind of casually threw it up on myspace/facebook the people who noticed didn't even really bat an eye. I wussed out and didn't go the direct route, but people (even a surprised one) just took it as me being me.
     
  7. Amy

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    I've started just asuming people know and fucking with their minds. Certain people, that is. <.<

    But, you are expected to be straight and, to put it nicely, there are alot of negative attitudes towards those who are not.
     
  8. Bryan

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    I guess I am the only one here who feels this way, but I want to come out for more than a relationship. I just want to be honest with those around me and I want to be my self.

    Oh, and I don't think we make it a big deal. The Public makes it a big deal, so we have to treat it like one.
     
  9. George1

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    I see your point, but things probably won't be like what you envision for a LONG time.. If ever.
     
  10. Gerry

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    I see what you're saying and you're right we shouldn't have to come out for any reason. But that's the way society is. Everyone expects straight to be the norm and if you're not the "norm" you need to come out and say it I guess.
     
  11. Janvier

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    I still don't get the point, why is coming out bad in any way?
    Just because straight people don't have to?
    I still think it's a very important moment in a gay persons life.
     
  12. Amy

    Amy
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    I think straight people should come out.


    It totally makes us special...
     
  13. listen up world

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    Yes. That's the way the world should be. Eventually, it could be that way...probably not in our lifetime or anytime soon...
     
  14. starfish

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    I've been debating this a lot myself lately.

    I've come to the conclusion that I shouldn't have to and it is not fair, but alas that is the way the Mercedes Benz.
     
  15. waitingsucks

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    unfourtunately that sort of behavior could upset your parents if you were to do something like that. It's just not showing you trust them, even though society is illogical we still have to abide by the general rule that being gay is "different" and people need appropriate warning and time to come to terms with it, both for the gay person and their friends and family
     
  16. Janvier

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    Yeah, it's called disrepect :icon_wink

    Just to put things into perspective, here's the same situation but much more extreme:
    Some people think being gay is worse than being a drug addict.

    And it's not like coming out is a life changing event or anything, right? :rolleyes:
    'Coming out' is just basic communication really, letting someone know you like the same sex. There's no reason not to do it, and it's not a one time thing either, you 'come out' your whole life to many many people.
    If someone asks me if I have a girlfriend, I come out, the same as a vegeterian would do when someone asks him if he wants a steak. I never came out as a carnivore but vegeterians have to.
    They are different from the norm.
    WE are different from the norm.

    This is all just my opinion, of course.
     
  17. Gumtree

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    Every time a person thinks, talks, makes a judgment, recommendation or anything about you as a person it's based on what they know and assume.

    When you become a member of a minority, what they assume is suddenly wrong.

    That leads to all sort of problems.

    For one, when it comes to friends and family, they have the wrong expectations of you, believe you are comfortable around things you aren't and that mentality spreads to anyone they talk to you about.

    When it comes to other homosexuals+, it's a way of being identified. A LOT, I mean a LOT of people instinctively avoid people that they don't "KNOW" the orientation of. It saves a lot of potential heartache and rejection, being open shows other people an openness of mind, of acceptance and shows the potential friendships and even relationships possible.


    I agree that people shouldn't have to come out to avoid these situations, but until society stops "assuming" heterosexuality is the norm then yes, telling people is necessary.

    And of course you don't have to tell the world, you don't even need to tell your friends, but it is necessary to tell a potential partner.
     
  18. BitterEdge

    BitterEdge Guest

    I just told my friends so I wouldn't have to explain when I introduced them to my bf, etc. As for coming out normally, eventually people won't have to, but in this day in age we have to.

    Oh btw, I love the thing about running upstairs and have loud sexy time....rofl
     
  19. Peter

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    Because I want people to stop treating me like a ***** heterosexual!
     
  20. kramer362

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    I only come out to those I am close with who assume I'm heterosexual that I have never corrected on that fact before. I have enough respect for the people I'm close with to not let them find out through some stupid gossip. Everyone else can make their own assumptions I don't care.

    It'd be cool if as I get older though I wouldn't have to 'come out' anymore. If I become close with someone they should already know I'm gay because I would talk openly about it as much as straight people speak about the opposite sex. Ideally...