I'm sure everybody has those days when he/she feels ugly and uncomfortable in their own skin but in my case, I just can't stop thinking about my looks All my thoughts are about being "handsome" and "hot" even though everybody's got a different definition about those and I know that perfectly well. I am just... so desperate to look the way the hetero boys look that I've become much more narcissistic than I used to - their total masculinity and nice bodies (I know you can work hard and become muscular but I can never be as macho-acting as the others). Plus, I've never been like the typical dudes - I've always looked differently and had different interests yet I still want to act like they do with such ease. I also can't get over the fact I'm fat - so I started going to the gym, but I'm so impatient! My will is weak. I've been told I looked well and still, I wasn't satisfied. Perhaps I need an approval or a proof that I'm good-looking? Sometimes I even think about committing suicide rather than living with all those imperfections (ridiculous, I know!) I'm just incredibly confused. I need help, I'd be grateful if someone decides to give a hand. Thanks!
Hey, every one feels the same. Especially anyone our age. I'm from an all-girls school, and there are many types of girls. The bimbos, the bitches (scratch that, everyone's a bitch here), the stuckups, the clingy ones-but one thing in common in their body shape. It's the typical Singaporean shape-flat stomach, boobs and butt, nice legs, generally acne-free face. It's pressuring-I won't say sometimes, because it is all the time-to want to look like them, to fit in. I won't fan your ego and say how handsome you look (what I consider handsome is skewered, anyways) or try to comfort you on that, but seriously. It's something that you can only work towards. I used to be extremely uncomfortable in my own skin-I don't have very tame hair that looks good in most hairstyles, a good body shape, and a perfect face. I used to be very uncomfortable, and went through crazy lengths to hide myself. That period was painful, since I couldn't tell anyone at fear of being laughed at. But I realized that hiding made me look even more horrible. Now, all we can do is work towards 'looking good' and sucking it up. Seriously, suck up all your negative feelings. It makes you look even worse, trust me. In the end, we can't always look good. Being comfortable in your own skin is the best way to go. 'Sides, I'm not sure about you, but over here, some of them are really so ugly, but they can somehow get a boyfriend. (It's kinda puke-worthy, really. They're mostly the despo but in the popular clique ones.) No one can be perfect, no one can look perfect. In fact, from what I can see from your profile pic, you look perfectly fine with me. Least you don't have acne scars all over. (Scars of the war of puberty, I tell my overly-short friend.) Quit beating yourself up over something so trivial and focus on the bigger picture. A confident person is always much better then a pretty/handsome person but with 0 confidence. Cheer up, brother. Life can be much worse.
Thanks so much for that detailed reply! I absolutely agree, we just have to suck it up and accept ourselves no matter how we look. I'm sure there's much more important things to take care of rather than spending all of our time on the looks and the temporary. We should invest in your minds and intelligence because now THAT'S important. You can see pretty people everywhere you go but the ones possessing intelligence and common sense are needles in a haystack.
