Is yelling at/hitting someone the best way to teach them?

I personally don't think it's the best way. Hitting? No. Yelling? Could be used as an option, I suppose, after other options are used. But it depends on what you're yelling and what you're saying, and of course it can be damaging. You can tell someone off without shouting at them.

There are better ways to teach children and students. From my perspective, I'm not a big fan of it at all. It can very easily be harmful and affect people later in the future, especially young children.

However I'm sure other people have some articles/studies, and know some concrete evidence, that I don't have right now.

 

Hitting, no.
Yelling, yes

 

Abuse is never the answer.

 

You can discipline people without abuse. I got yelled at regularly as a kid and now I get really anxious when someone shouts at me. Due to my fibromyalgia I'm also ridiculously sensitive to noise :|

 

It is very misguided to think you can gain someone's admiration and respect by yelling at or hitting them. And how can you teach them without their respect? (admiration helps as well)

I wouldn't necessarily say that lots of people *think* this is a good way to teach...but manymany do it, regardless of what they think. Our skills for handling situations tend to be rather limited, outside of what we've experienced ourselves...when shit gets real, we tend to reach for how we were treated, even if we *hated* how we were treated and know it didn't work with us.

Also, humans tend to be lazy and incompetent, and it takes a hell of a lot less thought and effort to just freak out reactively when someone does something wrong than it does to actually foster good behavior/thinking from the start. So the entire human race could know they shouldn't yell and hit...and still would, because they themselves just aren't capable of doing better than that.

---------- Post added 12th Oct 2015 at 01:15 PM ----------

I will add that yelling is a good way of *getting someone's attention*. So if the infraction has life or death consequences in the moment, yelling is appropriate...if they don't respond to a yell, they may yet respond to a hit (another way to get attention).

But those are the only times I think it makes sense to do this to either a soldier *or* a child.

 

Growing up, spanking or yelling at me only encouraged me to be worse, or at least not get caught. I couldn't stand somebody getting one up on me, so no, in my case, it was a total failure.

As for why soldiers are yelled at, it's to get them outside of their comfort zone. It's a kind of training, basically. I could elaborate but, that's really all there is to it.

 

Sometimes.. but I try to avoid hitting people these days - I already have a police caution for that type of behaviour. They hit me first though!

But nah, I don't condone hitting children.. ever. Proven to be ineffective.

 

Hitting and yelling just are expressions of anger, they're not tactful for young people. Children aren't going to respond the same way soldiers do, but people will always deny facts if they don't correspond with their heretofore established worldview, so what difference would it make?

 

No, hardly ever, unless you're in a fight, perhaps, or if the other person is drunk and/or attacking you. But aside from that, no. And even in those cases, it's better to just leave the situation as soon as possible.

 

Mom of 4 humans and foster/real mom to dozens of dogs. Hitting and/or yelling does not teach anything other than fear and avoidance. MOST living things that are trainable respond best to respect, guidance and direction.

A lot of people believe that ebcause they were raised that way and are "fine" that it is acceptable. Every single person ive met with this thought process has somesortof psychological damage that affects their relationships in life. Some people dont think its fromthe way their were treated as a child. Mostof a childs brain is developed by like age 3, after a certain age it is VERY hardto reverse damage done in those early years, which is when the brunt of aggressive punishment is used.

There are dozens if not hundreds of studies PROVING the damagedone to children who are notonly hit or yelled atbut who are not shown respect orlove. Raising creatures that have the ability to feel is far more complicated than anyone cares tobelieve. Because people like to use force, fear and shame to gain compliance. Which is why kids grow up fucked up, and "beloved" pets attack.

Its not amatter of what peoplefeel is right orwrong or what works or doesntthere is overwhelming PROOF that hitting/yelling does no good in the long term.

no one is perfect mistakes willbe made, what you do withthosemistakes will ultimately decide what kind of being will come out like under your care.

 

I'd say probably not.

Yesterday my dad slapped me in the face for almost crashing the car into the neighbor's fence. I really don't think it helped the situation. o.o

 

You don't need to tolerate that kind of behaviour from your father.

 

No. Fucking. Way.

Abuse does not teach you to be a better person, it just teaches you that abuse is okay to do. Another point is that if all you do is punish someone, then they will not learn right from wrong, they will just learn how to not get caught.

Personally in my case, and probably many others too, abusive forms of punishment just make me even more rebellious and will not work on me at all. Go to hit me? My instinct will kick in to make sure you do not hit me, whether that means blocking or disabling you first. Shout at me? I will just laugh it off and tell you to shut up.

I repeat: abuse does not work in any way, shape, or form to teach someone. Anyone who believes it is an effective method, seriously needs to reconsider many things, especially having children/people to look after.

 

As far as service members areconcerned...that is not the same, IMO they are not learning how to be good people. Service members are essentially reprogrammed to accept killing/taking life while they are in, there is a lot ofstuff that goes into military training and the soldiers will suffer consequences regardless. The nature ofthe job, whetherthey are yelled at ornot it is a high stress environment and psychologically damaging. Its better suited that we concentrate on helping them regain their self when their service is over.

I explained that quite horribly soi hope it makes sense.

EDIT even in non combat rates they are still trained to accept what they are helping with what they are aiding is the loss of life in order toprotect freedoms. Ifthey trained with kidness/respect/love (essentially what is needed to raise a human from infancy) service members would fail attheir jobs.

 

Well, it's not something he usually does. Luckily the pain didn't last long, either. There's no mark from it, as far as I can tell.

He has a really bad temper. >.<

 

...i think 16 was about when i started hitting back...

 

Regardless, there is no excuse for hitting you across the face. If your father has a bad temper, it is his responsibility to seek help - you're not there to act as a lightning rod for his frustration.

 

I don't know how those article editors could say such a thing about teaching kids by shouting and yelling.This in my opinion is negative reinforcement and may be damagin for the child's future mental health.Thise editors need to be ashamed of themselves it is just not morally right.This I doubt will come into effect as no morally right parent would obviously allow this happen to their children.

If I was older and this was to happen I would campaign about it until it is changed.Thy is my opinion in the matter.Those articles might say it would help them learn but this isn't true.They would be going to school in fear that they would be yelled at.