I went to a Halloween party at the weekend - first Halloween party I've been to in years, and I got to dress up and I was really looking forward to it, but... Once the party was in full swing, I pretty much sat around listening to people talking crap. And talking more crap as they became more drink. I was drinking, but didn't get drunk, it got to the point where I didn't want to drink any more because I wasn't enjoying myself enough. But there was people talking about what drugs they'd taken and how many people they've shagged and what sort of fights they got into and I just didn't have anything to contribute to those kinds of conversations. I probably came across as an absolute prude, but I didn't really care. I don't have the energy to make up bullshit about myself just to make me sound more impressive. The other thing is, I was the only gay person there. Everyone woman at the party thought i was hot, and obviously none of the men were interested because they were the boyfriends of most of the girls that were there. And at one point the girls tried to get me into a conversation about blowjobs and I just stayed quiet and let the subject change. There was only a few people there that I knew already, and while I can relax and have a laugh with people, I kind of need to get to know people over time before I feel comfortable enough to show them my fun loving side. It's like when I get to know colleagues at work - at first I want to show them that I take the job seriously and then over time I start to reveal more of my cheeky and humorous side. I can't just bring out my sense of humor around a bunch of people I've never met before. So, there's my rant of the month. anybody had a disappointing experience with parties?
You are literally like me! I went to a party once (I was 15) and all the people there were getting drunk and acting like they were in a uni party or something. I just don't get why people my age get drunk and have sex at parties. It's really embarrassing, even more so when they unwelcomley crash parties specifically for UNIVERSITY STUDENTS :/ ugh it's awful I ended up having a lovely conversation with a friend who I kinda new. We sort of bonded during that party since we were talking for a couple of hours :lol:
I think that you're not rubbish at parties, but rather, that was a rubbish party, haha. I've been to several parties and they've been pretty tame, apart from the excessive drinking and 420. I never participated in it and was always in the corner doing nothing but eating the party food. I know I can be quite the friendly person, but when there's just too much people, I just can't get myself to open up. Interesting thing, though: if I'm at a club and there's a LOT of people, I can open up more. Maybe because the people kind of drown out themselves and I feel I'm not compelled to mingle. Side question: What did you dress up as this year?
I hate parties. Everything is so crowded and chaotic, plus I really don't like talking to people. I like people though, I'm just kinda shy.
You're definitely being too hard on yourself. I can assure you that not all parties are like this. Try partying with different crowds? Haha, I'm not the best one to give advice on partying, but I hope it helps in some way. I've never had any real bad experiences with parties. Though, for my 16th birthday, all I wanted to do was to go to the movies with my two friends and it turned out that my mom planned a surprise party. It wasn't exactly a joyful experience, because I've never done well with overwhelming crowds of people. Half way through my party, I started getting agitated and a little grouchy. It just wasn't a good overall experience.
There was only a couple of people that chatted to me about normal things like movies and TV shows and music, and they didn't stay very long. By the end of it, everyone was sitting around talking about sex and pointing out sexual innuendo at every opportunity, and it got boring. I don't like talking about my sex life with a group of strangers (ironic, since that's what I'm doing here, but this place provides discretion!) and as I've admitted on these forums, my sex life hasn't been very exciting, so it's not something I like to treat like a joke to provide amusement for a bunch of strangers who think they're impressive. It kind of frustrates me that I was looking forward to taking time off work to enjoy myself and relax at a party, and I ended up having less fun than I do at work when I'm chatting with my colleagues.
I hated social situations (for the most part) for a long time unless I was comfortable with the people there. I used to get drunk otherwise but still hated "oh I fucked her/him" blah blah blah. Or about sports that I didn't care about. There is also nothing wrong with not liking huge parties that are an indistinguishable mass of people you don't know. Stuff can be overwhelming. If you want to go to parties go to one's with people you know you share some commonality with.
This is me. Never been to one of those parties but I've been to a few get-together sort of things and all I did was eat food. I now just don't go, unless they're close friends of course. It also depends on if I have something to eat at home, if I don't I go for the free food >_>
I don't really like parties, but i go to some ocasionally because my boyfriend loves them. Meh, i don't really like leaving my "castle" (home)
I always used to feel insecure in social situations because I didn't have a decent job and felt embarrassed and awkward trying to talk to people because I didn't feel impressive. Now I do have a decent job and more confidence in myself but I still have difficulty connecting with people. I'm never gonna be someone who can keep a crowd of people amused.
I don't go to parties. They're not my scene. I think they can be incredibly fun if it's your thing, but if it's not...then fine. If you had a party at your level, don't you think people would be posting the same thing you did? I have learned to find friends that accept me for me and know my level of fun. I went to a little get together at a friends recently. It was so much fun - yes, we drank but it was people I care about and they love me (even when I vomited everywhere, haha). You don't have to do things you don't want to do. You don't NEED to party, have sex, do drugs - you NEED food and water.
Sounds like the kind of party I would always have hated (even when I was young) Now I hang around with a different crowd. - much better social gatherings!
I've been to parties I completely hated like Nice Dave described. I've also been to parties where I've had the time of my life. It usually depends on WHO is at the party. I was at a Halloween party Saturday night and had the time of my life. Most of the people there were kind of geeky and the conversation was light and fun. It gave me a lot to talk about and allowed me to meet new people easily. At the same time, I've been to parties like the original post where everyone talks about drugs and shagging girls, so I wind up sitting quietly. In the right circumstances and conversation, I can be very funny, outgoing, and charming. Give me topics I know little about and people I'm not crazy about, and I become very reserved.
That's my problem - there weren't enough geeky people there for me to relate to. If the subject did turn to anything remotely geeky, I'd start piping up and sharing my opinions, but others didn't have a clue what the topic was about, so it would turn back to sex and drugs and whatever, and I'd pipe down again and sit being quiet and boring. If the subject ever turned to music, it was normally about rock bands that I lost interest in ages ago. I can rarely have a meaningful conversation about my music tastes because I'm into alternative artists who are not well known, and they write about subjects that affect me deeply and personally, but its not the sort of stuff I can talk about with people who are getting drunk and mouthing off and trying to act hard.
I hate anyplace with a lot of people in a relatively small space, so parties are basically hell for me :lol:
Lol that sounds like me when I was 15 - but they weren't university students. A lot of the people I hung out with at that age were 18-19 (I'm reluctant to call them friends). Doing the stuff they did, made me feel older, but it was pretty stupid really. It's not hard to spot people that age at parties - they really can't handle their alcohol at all. Bear in mind though, that nearly all of the crap 15 year olds say about sex, or how much they've had, is exactly that - crap. Whenever I'm on the bus and see a bunch of high school kids talking about the antics they supposedly get up to, I just want to pat them on the head and say 'Bless'. I love parties, but I don't want to spend the entire night talking about sex or drugs - if they are the only two things a person does, they're not very well-rounded or interesting. You should find better people to party with.
