So I have been thinking a lot about if I am transgender or not. I'm biologically female. I feel masculine and have always felt masculine since I was a kid. To describe myself in percentages, I feel like I am 75% male and 25% female. I do not like to really look feminine at all, I try to wear guy clothes when I'm at college and when I'm at home I wear more neutral stuff to not piss off my parents too much. I absolutely HATE dresses and girl clothes, I feel so out of place. Although I feel that way, I still feel feminine in the aspect of "feelings" and "emotions." I don't want to sound like I'm sexist or like guys can't be emotional, but I am just very in tune to peoples feelings and I am very empathetic. I also like romantic movies and all that stuff. That's mostly the most "feminine" thing about me though. Also a reason I'm questioning it is that I don't really want to go on T, mostly because I'm scared of some effects of it (i.e clit enlargement, higher sex drive ect) so not wanting to be on T I'm not sure if that would be somewhat a "requirement" to being trans. I do however want to get top surgery or at least a very severe breast reduction to the smallest possible size I could go. I'm hoping to get a binder after winter break since money is tight and I can't wear it at home anyway. Another thing I am confused is my close friends asking what name or pronouns I prefer. I say I don't care because I don't in a way I think because I've been called by my birthname (which I don't care for and don't feel like it fits me) for nearly 23 years so I'm just used to it and I don't mind female pronouns because of that I'm used to it and also that I know biologically I am a female and I'm not going to get mad at someone for using female pronouns. I'm nervous for my friends to start calling me by my already thought of guy name and using male pronouns I'm not really sure why. I'm just so confused and I don't really have anyone to talk or help me through figuring it out. If anyone has any tips ideas opinions whatever please let me know. Thanks! (!) i like this emoji
Hi! You sound like a masculine female to me. Like a tomboy, maybe? It's so rude people haven't replied to you yet. Maybe it's because you posted your thread here and not in the Gender Identity and Expression forum. Gender is a f*cked up thing, so it's normal not to have all the answers. Nobody has it actually. However, if it's helpful to you, here is my advise(or call it whatever, it's not really an advice): I was in a situation like yours this year earlier. I didn't know if I was androgynous, female, trans, masculine, femenine... I really had no clue. People in this forum had suggested that I could be trans... Anyway, you know when I realised I was actually cis? It will sound weird, but... while masturbating. LET ME EXPLAIN. I realised that every single time I masturbated, I saw myself as a female. Every. Time. I guess guys see themselves as guys, right? So think about your feelings while masturbation(yes it only gets weirder as I try to rewrite it to make it sound less creepy) and... just rethink it.(?) Nobody here is able to tell you what you are or who you are, unfortunately.
